A lot of people like to pretend that science is a good thing. Well it isn't. I'll admit it does a few good things, but these are far outweighed by the the evil things it does. Especially in the movies. We know from them that the majority of scientists are mad and evil. Either bent on enslaving mankind or wiping it from the face the earth. For this irrational diatribe I'm going to take a look at one innovation and show how awful it really is. That's mainly because it's the only example I could think of. Also due to the fact it adversely affects me. That's always bad and evil in my book. I'm talking about DNA obviously. Life was so much easier before DNA. Its discovery and use has complicated my life no end. Back a few decades ago I could go about pursuing my hobbies very easily. Now, thanks to the discovery of DNA, this is no longer the case. Have you any idea how much bleach I have to bring along with me to remove the DNA evidence? It's a lot I'll tell you. Then there's all the plastic sheeting for the blood splatter. I've also got to wear disposable overalls, shoe coverings and rubber gloves. Preparation time has increased exponentially. The clean up time even more so. Sometimes a crime scene needs more than a raging inferno to remove all traces. Those rubber gloves make my hands sweat and give me a rash. That bleach affects my lungs for days after every atrocity. I've made up a list anyway. Mostly scientists. Hopefully I'll get around to all of them eventually. Unfortunately, due to DNA evidence, my work rate has slowed right down so I can't guarantee anything. I'm already having to cut down drastically on the time spent torturing them, to fit more in. That's taking cutting corners a bit too far. Slowly, but surely, science is taking all the joy out of serial murdering. That's why science is evil.
(The copyright to this image is the property of SciJinks.)
The day went pretty much as predicted. The first team arriving at the summit of the hill at exactly an hour after daylight. Jake took out both of them in that small break in the cover. The second round on its way before the first target's brain violently exited his skull. It was quite satisfying in so many ways. The second man not even noticing when his companion fell dead behind him. As he'd suspected that caused a lot of movement down at the foot of the hill. The spares hastily heading up that slope as though they had an urgent appointment to keep. There he picked off four, with three rounds. The double kill particularly pleasing, because it was unintended. Another couple tried to rush the gap and failed miserably. After which the Galakhandians changed tactics. They brought up an armored vehicle. Four or five of Poppy's specials turned that into a burning wreck. No survivors. Not as pleasing though. Now they'd be forced to use counter sniper methods themselves.
To be fair they were quite good. It didn't take them that long to work out where Jake was and they only lost two more men finding out. All of the advantages were with him though. They could tell he was shooting from within the ship. They couldn't tell exactly where he was within the ship. Especially given he moved after each kill. Changing portholes randomly and moving around inside. They did get three rounds inside the ship. All of them way to high and fired in hope more than expectation. Only for the shooter to die shortly afterwards. There was a danger here that they'd run out of potential snipers long before he ran out of bullets. Made more so by him constantly trying to repeat the feat of two with one round. He never did manage that again. There was always tomorrow.
Although the people of this place viewed death and murder as part and parcel of their daily lives, they did have rules. One of which seemed to be no knives. According to Hermes at least. They didn't bring up any heavy weapons either. Chain guns were out. peppering the Harlot with a few hundred rounds wasn't within the spirit of their regulations. Towards the end of the day, the pickings were slim to none. He waited for an hour and a half. No visible movement from up there. He'd call it a day. Jake picked up his gear and urine bottle, before heading back to his cabin. After dropping his kit off he went up on deck. The crew were moving about cautiously. Jake had inadvertently disturbed the equilibrium of the situation he thought. With him slaughtering the speculative assassins the hour after dawn, and the hour before dusk, might not be as safe as they once were.
Pip was at the lookout station, situated at the base of the main mast. The lookouts carefully examining the surroundings. She acknowledged him while talking to them. Then came over to where he was. Leaning against the entrance to below decks.
"How did you do today then?" She asked casually, casting her eyes about the main deck.
"Seventeen in total. There were a few in an armored vehicle, but I'm not counting them. That's 25 in total." He stated with a considerable amount of self satisfaction.
"That's barely a blip on the homicide rate in this town. It's an average afternoon on some streets."
"I'm looking at the bigger picture though." He countered.
"Which is?"
"I'm enjoying myself and I don't give a shit about anything else. They started it."
"You said that before." Morag had come on deck. "Did you do something to upset her?" Pip inquired nodding towards the copper curled engineer. While trying not to laugh.
Jake spotted Morag in close conversation with Pengelly. Both of them gave him hostile looks.
"Balls." Jake exploded. "Has she told everyone?"
"I don't know what you mean." The boatswains mate declared, unconvincingly.
"You know. About me being a necrophiliac, rapist with designs on Scarlet's comatose body."
"Now you come to mention it she may have said something along those lines. Suggested that you not be allowed to visit her alone. Tamsin's keeping watch now. In case you sneaked away for a quick fumble during your counter sniper operation."
"What? Now she's told everybody I suppose." He whined, disconsolately.
"No just the officers and Tamsin. They thought it best not to cause a panic among the crew. Render them too frightened to sleep, because you might sneak up on them."
"Oh come on. How could anyone think that of me? They know me quite well now. Surely they must know I wouldn't do anything like that. I haven't even got form. Nobody's woken up with me rummaging around their nether regions."
Pip was enjoying this enormously.
"True. But they've also seen you fight your way through the entire ships company and annihilate the artificers guild in Palamar. They know you wouldn't do any such thing. What they don't know is whether anything you brought back with you has the same moral compass. Your activities today have hardly helped."
"Son of a bitch." He cursed. "The only hope I've got is that Scarlet explains the misunderstanding when she regains consciousness."
Pip gave him her most incredulous look.
"Are we talking about the same Scarlet here? If so, that's a slim hope."
"I know. She's going to make capital out of this. Given her devious mind, I'm inclined to think that she planned this all along. Now I won't even be able to see her."
Pip clapped him on the back.
"Of course they'll let you see her. They won't let you touch her though." She gestured suggestively with her hands. "Your mitts might go a wandering. The temptation too much for you to resist."
Jake gave her a suspicious look.
"That's pretty much what Scarlet said. Are you in on this with her?" Given pause for thought, Jake thought for once. "That would require a degree of knowledge that I don't think even she has. I'm still not sure though. Anything's possible where she's concerned. You believe me though don't you?" He concluded desperately.
"I'm not so sure. Who knows what horror you've returned as? We could all be molested in our sleep." Seeing his face she took mercy upon him. "Of course I do. Remember I've gone through the whole rigmarole of getting into bed with you. I'm also fairly sure I can tell you from whatever you might become. I've known you a bit longer though."
"Thanks. Have they told Daisy yet?"
"Not that I know of. She'd take it with a pinch of salt. You having known her for even longer. Than anyone else in fact. Besides if you tried anything like that with her she'd the beat the shit out of you."
"As would Scarlet. Although she doesn't need an excuse. I'm going to eat in my cabin I think. I don't think I could stand company right now. Not while I'm under suspicion."
"Is that wise? They might think you're aiming to creep into the sickbay."
"I'm going there now. You said Tamsin is keeping watch. I'll check on Scarlet and then head for my bunk. I don't think I need to be in the same room as her."
The youngster gave him a questioning look.
"To do what?"
"Enter her memory palace."
Pip giggled.
"That's the first time I've ever heard it called that." She joked.
"We've both got memory palaces. Hers is nicer than mine and that's a fact. It's where we store memories we wish to keep. From previous lives. That's where I was last night." That brought a smile back to his face. One Pip recognized instantly.
"I bet you were in her memory palace, all night long."
"Well I don't like to brag but it must have been at least 5 minutes." He sobered instantly. "Do I need to call ahead or ask permission or anything?"
"No. I'm sure Tamsin will recognize you. For the disgusting pervert you are."
She did to. Eyeing Jake suspiciously as soon as he knocked politely on the door. Not a cursory look. The head to toe minute examination. None of which looked good. She didn't even speak to him. Simply nodding curtly as she held the door open. Then sticking to his side like glue. It didn't help that she deliberately signaled she had her eye on him. There was no need for that. The room wasn't that big.
He was there to see Scarlet. Though he'd also be seeing her that night in a more conscious form . There he'd be allowed to touch her. He assumed so anyway. The color was returning to her face which looked a lot better. Rather than desperately ill she appeared restful. This was a difficult situation. Knowing that any move he made towards that body, it would be assumed suspicious. Yet, in a sense, if he didn't at least attempt to lay hands on her that would make him even more suspicious. If he were innocent, which he definitely was, he wouldn't be holding his arms so stiffly at his sides. In the end he cast caution to the winds and carefully brushed a lock of hair from Scarlet's face before stroking her cheek and hair. The gentlest of touches, for a lady who was as tough as nails.
"What are you doing?" Tamsin demanded. her attention had wandered and then suddenly been brought back. He hadn't really moved.
"I'm checking her for head lice. What do you think I'm doing?"
She didn't even acknowledge his sarcasm.
"Keep your hands where I can see them."
"Well if you loose sight of them the first place you should look is on the end of my arms. If they aren't there then we've both got problems. How is she?"
Tamsin's face indicated this might be far too personal a question, coming from him.
"She should be conscious tomorrow. All being well." That last part aimed at him. "As long as nobody interferes."
"Oh dear. Has somebody been touching your stuff? I'll be off then." He edged past her.
Tamsin moved into his way.
"Where are you going?" She challenged.
"Anywhere the secret password will allow me."
Again, due to her distrust of him and his motives, the sarcasm eluded her.
"What secret password?"
He was willing to go along with it.
"You mean they didn't tell you? Well there must have been a reason I suppose. Never mind. Maybe they'll let you in on it later. Only the trusted few are permitted to know it. No idea why they don't trust you."
"Who are they?"
"I couldn't possibly reveal that. I've been sworn to secrecy. If you'll step aside, I'll take my leave."
With the utmost reluctance she sidestepped out of his way. Jake exited the sickbay. Pengelly and Morag were standing there. Both of them looking wary and nonchalant at the same time. He smiled at them. They frowned back before nodding. As soon as he set off he heard them behind him as they entered the sick bay.
He wasn't annoyed. These people loved Scarlet as much as he did in their own way. They were looking out for her. And, as Pip had stated, he did have a tendency to go feral all over people. Though he was no such thing, they must feel like they were dealing with an unexploded bomb. He had threatened them before that code phrase had rendered him harmless. That wasn't good. he should really apologize at some convenient point. They were doing what was best.he was being an asshole. His current situation was what he deserved. Jake got some grub and ate it in his room. Against all his late mothers advice he lay down on his bunk. Closed his eyes and spoke that random phrase Scarlet had used on him. Lucifer's kittens, crazily cavorting among onions. The first time it had taken a while before it was effective. He wondered how long he'd have to wait. The sunshine beating down on his head indicated it wasn't long.
He was standing on a beach. One he recognized. This was the Gold Coast of Australia. They'd stopped off here a few times in their multiple lives. Damn it was hot. The sweat was already streaming down his body. Scarlet raced past him. This time in a red bikini. She splashed into the sea up to her knees before turning around and calling to him.
"Come on then. Get into the water."
He didn't have to, but he looked down over himself.
"I'm sorry? May I ask why, yet again, you're in a bathing costume and I'm in the all wool Mad Hatters suit."
"I told. That's my fetish. Play your cards right and that suit will be all over me."
He started trudging towards the ocean waves.
"I'm going to tell you something now, in the hope that you won't use it against me and in the knowledge that you will. I've got to get it off my chest. In the interests of full disclosure."
This was going to make her day.