Dear Feminists..

in #mgtow7 years ago

I'm gonna switch gears and talk some issues that have been on my mind lately..

We do not live in a patriarchy

Domestic Violence

According to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence(NCADV), 1 in 3 women, and 1 in 4 men have been victims of some form of domestic violence in their lifetime.. It's much more reciprocal than any feminist will ever admit.. If the rates are actually so close, why is it that there are next to no shelters for men, and thousands for women? For Decades feminists have touted Domestic Violence as simply "wife beating" when from the very beginning, one of the first women to ever create a domestic abuse shelter.. Erin Pizzey, has said the women she took in were just as violent, if not more violent than the men they were trying to escape. She was run out of her own shelters by feminists for suggesting this. Would a patriarchal society have no resources to help a man who is being abused? My tax dollars pay for women's shelters, and i believe that the number of shelters and who they provide services to should be based on the resources available and the need. So when there's a man who needs to escape a violent woman, he has options.

Paternity Fraud

There are laws in place that force a man who was lied to about being the father of a child, to continue to support the woman who lied about it.. It is legalized theft.. in which the victim can be sent to prison.. If you want gender equality, then you'd want women to be punished when they lie about who the father of their child is in order to get money from him. Would a patriarchal society allow this to happen to men?

Selective Service

The privelidge of being a citizen comes with the responsibility of protecting the country when necessary.. In a patriarchal society, where men exploit women for their own personal gain, and are advantaged above women.. why would men be the only ones who have to sacrifice their own life? In a patriarchal society, women would be used as human shields in combat, not exempt from combat.. that is more indicative of a gynocentric society where women are valued above men.

Reproductive rights

When a child is conceived.. what options does a woman have?
a. She can carry it to term
b. She can carry it to term and adopt it out
c. She can abort it..

No matter what she does, the system is designed to protect her rights.. and support her until the child can function on it's own.

What are men's options once a child is concieved?
a. Do what the woman wants, or go to jail.

A man can be forced into fatherhood before he is ready, but a woman can kill a chlid if she is forced into motherhood before she is ready. In a patriarchal society, women would be forced into motherhood, or forced to abort with no options once the baby is concieved.. it would be up to the man who knocked her up.. in our society it is absolutely the opposite.
Nobody is saying that a woman should not have control over her reproduction, but what we are saying is that a man should be able to have more control over his. All a woman has to do is sleep with a man, and she gets a free ride for at least 20 years.. at his expense.

Criminal court bias

"Men receive 63% longer sentences on average than women do," and "[w]omen are…twice as likely to avoid incarceration if convicted." This gender gap is about six times as large as the racial disparity that Prof. Starr found in another recent paper.

There is no excuse for men being sentenced to more time for the same crimes as women.. over time, it allows women to expect to have no consequences for criminal behavior, and it's the most blatant encouragement for criminal behavior.. and it is also not indicative of a patriarchal society when a man is sentenced to 63% more time than a woman.. just one more way in which the patriarchy theory is garbage.

Sexual assault/rape

"The CDC study goes much further in asking about specific unwanted acts. But there are other important differences. For one, CDC survey respondents are not asked whether anyone has used physical force or threats to make them engage in a sexual activity, but “how many” people have done this (in their lifetime and in the past year). This wording removes the extra hurdle of admitting that such a violation has happened, and thus encourages more reporting. But could it also create “false positives” by nudging people toward the assumption that the default answer is affirmative—especially when preceded by a battery of other questions and statements about sexually coercive behavior?"

Like I said before, they are expanding the definition of rape to make it look as though there is a "rape culture" of which men are the perpetrators and women the victims.. Not to mention, up until recently the definition of rape, excluded "rape by envelopement" which denied any time a woman forced a man to have sex.. thereby skewing the numbers in favor of only male perpetrators and female victims.. which is hardly reality.. in a rape culture within a patriarchal society, women would be raped all the time and nobody would care.. but in reality, nobody cares when a man is raped, and people actually think it's funny.. society is outraged when a woman is raped, because we value female life more than we value male life.

The definition of rape has been either "The carnal knowledge of a female forcibly and against her will" or "The penetration, no matter how slight, of the vagina or anus with any body part or object, or oral penetration by a sex organ of another person, without the consent of the victim." Which means that women cannot rape men.. in a rape culture within a patriarchal society, why would it be that men could not be the victims of rape?

Here's the ultimate difference in what I'm saying, and what feminists have been saying.. I'm not blaming all women for this. I'm blaming feminism for some of it because they have supported laws that make it more difficult for men to obtain even visitation of their children, they have used their influence to support primitive laws that make it impossible for a man to be raped. They have supported laws that make it impossible for a woman to receive consequences for crimes.. whether they are victimless crimes, or crimes against men.

They came up with ludicrous ideas like the patriarchy and rape culture.. using manipulated statistics, and men's biological desire to appease women to gain support. So while feminists are bitching about women getting cat-called by a small portion of the male population, there is man somewhere spending the rest of his life in and out of prison, and homeless because he got behind on child support payments on a child that isn't even his.. men have suffered in silence for long enough.. there are massive problems on the male side of the coin, and to deny that is reprehensible. We have dehumanized half of our population and then labeled them as sole perpetrators of every crime and every problem our society faces.

A big portion of the blame, however, goes onto men.. men refuse to speak about their problems, and because society for thousands of years has relied on men's willingness to die in war or work to keep society functioning.. we are immune to the suffering of men. Our survival used to be dependant on men sacrificing themselves in order to protect our society from threats and to do the jobs that maintain it. Nobody wants to watch how the sausage is made, but they're happy to eat it when they consciously or subconsciously ignore the suffering of the animal. It's a huge slap in the face to label all men as "toxic" or to label all men as "potential rapists" because of the behavior of a few men, especially considering how many hundreds of thousands of good men have DIED to bring us to this point, and continue to do so.. not because it gives them power over women.. but because they love women, and want to please them.

This is why feminism sickens me to the core, and my own personal experience with women, and the experience of other men I've met in my 37 years on this planet, reinforces every one of those statistics and stories I've attached above. Most men are invisible, and I guarantee you that if every working man in our country just decided to stop doing their part in keeping our society functioning, it would fall apart in a week. Men do the majority of utility work.. so no electricity, water, or sewer. Men are the majority of mechanics, and engineers.. so no transportation.. Men have created, maintain, and continue to innovate the majority of our technology.. so no more computers, cell phones, or any other form of communication.. the more dangerous and vital the job is to our society, the more people close their eyes to the suffering of the people performing it.. they don't want to see how they benefit from the risks those people take on a daily basis.

The biggest point I'm making here is that the evidence DOES NOT support the idea that we live in a patriarchy. The issues I mentioned above are more than enough evidence to destroy the idea that all men are oppressing all women in some male-dominated society.. there are places where women are at a disadvantage, but there are just as many if not more places where men are disadvantaged and suffer as a result.. this would not be the case in a patriarchal society.

Sort:  

"According to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence(NCADV), 1 in 3 women, and 1 in 4 men have been victims of some form of domestic violence in their lifetime.." Well, yes, thats skewed tbh. For one thing, if you ask about the past year instead of lifetime, it is much closer to parity.
The reality i would suggest looks much more grim. Likely for both parties.
This study specificly trying to investigate Reciprocal vs Nonreciprocal IPV found that nearly a quarter of all relationships involve intimate partner violence. Half (49.7%) of those reciprocal, the rest primarily(over 70%) perpetrated exclusivly by the female partner.

Now, if 24% of the 18761 heterosexual relationships surveyed involved IPV, the lower limit of how many people will have experienced IPV will be at least 24% of all people - assuming everyone only has one relationship in his lifetime.

Interrestingly enough though, in genral if you ask for lifetime, women report a higher rate, if you ask about the last year, however, you tend to find parity at least... A difference that isnt surprising if you consider how unreliable our memory is and how much our brain tends to rewrite our memories to conform to societal norms...
You know, if you ask people after an accident what role the man in the red jacket played, many will say he caused the accident - even though there was nobody in a red jacket.

Seems about right, 100% of my relationships involved a violent female partner. Well, in one case physicly violent, in the other "im crazy and if you dont do X ill hurt myself" (well, she was crazy or more precisly i think it would be shizophrenia... wasnt very long, that THAT wasnt a good idea was pretty damn clear).

The other somehow managed to convince me that she was my only option - sure, she was also physicly violent but a few scratches, not a big deal - even as countless other girls propositioned me. Some even knowing that she exists.
In the end, what i told her might happen did happen - i suffered another depressive episode - now that isnt related to anything going on in my life, thats biochemical. By now, its not a big deal for me anymore as i can live with that when it happens and smoke some weed to normalise my brainchemistry - but back then... Well, it was only my second episode so i wasnt yet used to it to the degree i am now. And while i tried to make sure early on that that wouldnt be a problem, it did lead to the end of the relationship.

By now i decided to do what feminists according to their words want: Not interacting with women, staying at home, living from feminists taxes through welfare and therby combatting the wage gap (well, yes, i am legitimatly disabled, multiple sclerosis among other things, but we dont have to tell them about that, do we?).

Somehow i doubt theyll hold me up as a feminist icon, despite this being what they according to their own words would logicly want.

Sorry it's taken me so long to reply to your comment.. been very busy in my personal life.

I do agree however that the rates of violence are much higher than anyone would admit. My personal opinion is that women are more often violent than men, but men cause more damage when they are violent. Then there's the fact that men don't want to report violence for fear of looking weak, or they just don't even consider it abuse.

To the delight of feminists, I think men's silence, and/or lack of care about violence perpetrated against them in their own personal relationships, causes the numbers to seem as though women are always the victim in domestic violence cases, and men are always the perpetrator. This has been shown to me in my own personal relationships.. one in particular where a girl attacked me during a fight, caught me off guard and shoved me into a wall. I'm twice her size, so it didn't hurt me.. I'm also a very easy going person, so I wasn't about to let it escalate from there. However, she had told me about how violent her ex-husband was and knowing that many men don't have as much patience as I do, I could see her provoking a short-tempered person into becoming violent by attacking him over and over again. If a woman hits, shoves, verbally abuses or otherwise mistreats a man over and over again, I have a hard time feeling sympathy for her when he knocks her ass out.

Well, you are not incorrect, but you are not right.

As many people have said, MGTOW isn't a way of living, its a survival mechanism.

Patriarchy exists in women's heads.
Women come up with all kinds of ideas, and then they run the past a man, who puts tons of holes in them (because, reasons) and so it is men who are the kill joys, who are the blockages of everything.

Such as, a woman wants to open a pretty cup-cake store. And then when she asks a man about it, he says, ok, it will cost $1,000/mo to rent the building, which equals you have to sell thousands of cup cakes, do you think you can sell that many? PATRIARCHY! Stop trying to weigh me down with all of your man bullshit.

It is just so easy to blame the ones who have given you everything, instead of looking inside. And so, it will always be patriarchy.


And really, men love women. Women... based on which way her emotions are blowing, hate/love men. So, in a patriarchy, the women are put on a pedestal. There are laws specially for women. There are shelters to protect women. Women just do not realize how nice it is to live in a patriarchy.

Now, a matriarchy, ... You know, the signs women carry, "my body, my choice"? Well, if women were in charge, it really becomes "your body, my choice". The women in charge decide who gets to breed. Who gets to have children. Of course its all for reasons, like not enough food...


Yes, women don't realize how good they got it.
The real thing is they are probably board.
All of the automated appliances have made women's lives too easy.
So, they bitch, because their life isn't fulfilling anymore.

Sorry it's taken me so long to respond.. been very very busy..

Men do love women, and it's kinda sad when you think about it.. considering how ambivalent most women are to that adoration.. they take if for granted that men should love them.. and it's not reciprocal. Whenever there is some kind of case where a women is assaulted.. like take that Brock Turner case.. where the drunken girl left a frat party with some kid, and he did stuff to her in an alley.. it was 2 other men who stopped him from going any further.. but they only briefly mention that in every article about the case. They'll go on and on about rape, toxic masculinity and patriarchy.. but forget to mention that there are good men out there, and 2 of them saved that stupid girl from being assaulted any further.

Also, they never mention for a second that women should maybe make better decisions in order to not find themselves in a situation where they COULD get assaulted. Why is nobody saying "if you don't wanna get raped, maybe you shouldn't be out getting blackout drunk with a bunch of horny college boys."

Maybe it's cold, and maybe it's a little bit of victim blaming, but we have choices.. and we are responsible for the decisions we make and responsible for protecting ourselves. It's nobodies else's job to be constantly vigilant of assault, each individual has to do that themselves.. it's never okay to assault a woman.. but women need to know that there are people out there who do not feel the same way, and if you're not careful you will fall victim to them. So why not do everything in your power to protect yourself from that? Which would include not getting so wasted that you end up unconscious for hours, allowing a pervert to violate you.

You rarely ever hear about all the great men who have protected and saved women from those perverts, it doesn't fit the patriarchal narrative.. men rescuing women from assault.. but when a woman is saved from being assaulted.. it's almost always a man who does it, and they'll never ever bring that up.. because a patriarchal society wouldn't save a woman from rape.. they'd just rape her again.

Right on! I'm in church and waiting for the next sermon, preacher. Nice article - direct, to the point, and filled with facts - all the stuff we're no longer allowed to say right here.

Thanks, I appreciate the feedback!

As soon as I have time I've got some other similarly themed pieces to put out there.. So there is more to come, my life has just been insanely busy for the last few weeks.. but as soon as I have time, there will be much more to come..

Thanks for reading!