emmistilton (50)in #satire • 6 years agoAustralia will never be safe until the government has the power to do as it pleasesAustralia will never be safe until the government has the power to do as it the pleases, the Australian government has confirmed today. The news comes after parliament pushed…emmistilton (50)in #travel • 6 years ago6 Things I Learnt After Spending The Past 3 Months in North Korea, Iran and Iraq(1) It is very easy to get swept up in something evil In North Korea I attended a performance called the mass games. It is a huge spectacle and entirely dedicated to the…emmistilton (50)in #sex • 6 years agoEmmis uncensored: “My bumble date said 3 words to me that made my balls explode”Every week I'm treated to a story on my apple news app by Nadia Bokody. She's a writer for Mama Mia and the stories revolve around her sexual adventures. It is brave (fierce…emmistilton (50)in #satire • 6 years ago"Stop sensationalising the news" says man who compares anyone who disagrees with him to hitlerThe Nazi's are everywhere. That's according to 28 year old perpetual student Thomas Creedence and it's only a matter of time before we're over run. “It is obvious we are…emmistilton (50)in #satire • 6 years ago#MeToo founder set to receive fair trial and due process after having sex with underage boyLeaders of the #MeToo movement have called for calm and due process after leader Asia Argento was accused of having sex with an underage child actor. Ms Argento, who was one of…emmistilton (50)in #satire • 6 years agoInterview With A White KnightThe name in this article has been changed because the last thing this man wants is attention. It didn't take much congratulations for Nate Smith's progressive views before he…emmistilton (50)in #trans • 6 years agoTrans woman dies of cancer after failing to tell Dr she identified with having a prostateA trans woman, otherwise known as a biological man, has died from prostate cancer after her doctor saw no reason for an examination because she identified as a typical woman.…emmistilton (50)in #satire • 7 years agoWild celebrations as Ireland votes yes to the killing of unborn babiesThe people of Ireland have burst out in wild celebrations overnight after a referendum passed allowing pregnant women to terminate unwanted pregnancies. Feminists have long…emmistilton (50)in #satire • 7 years agoAfricans accuse black Americans of cultural appropriationA group of Kenyan men have told black Americans to stop appropriating African culture after a series of high profile black entertainment being released by the movie and music…emmistilton (50)in #sex • 7 years agoStudies reveal "A Real Man" isn't afraid to cuckEvery few years society comes up with a definition of what it means to be a “real man” and those among us who believe in such things quickly adapt. For years men believed they…emmistilton (50)in #bitcoin • 7 years agoConfessions of a Dark Net Drug Dealer Part 1The following story was told to me by someone who wished to remain anonymous. I first got into drug dealing not long after my sister killed herself. It was early 2016 and i was…emmistilton (50)in #introduceyourself • 7 years agoHi, I write satire and I post it hereHi everyone, My name is Emmis Tilton and i write satire. I live in Australia. My website is www.thestocktontimes.com if you feel like checking it out. Cheersemmistilton (50)in #satire • 7 years agoStudies show alcohol in moderation is healthy due to everyday life being far more harmfulResearch from the USA has proven that moderate alcohol use is beneficial to health simply because nothing is more harmful to health than everyday life. Dr Claudia Kawas from…emmistilton (50)in #writing • 7 years agoLocal man forced back to porn after housemate breaks up with girlfriendA Sydney man has been forced back into the perverse world of online pornography after his housemates broke up and robbed him of the sounds he used to masturbate to. Brendan…emmistilton (50)in #bitcoin • 7 years agoOld man with no understanding of bitcoin convinced it’s a bubble54 year old Brendan Lucas will be the first person to tell you he knows a thing or 2 about money. After all, he’s spent nearly 8 years investing in the stock exchange and has…emmistilton (50)in #satire • 7 years agoMale feminist wondering how long does he have to agree with women until he gets laidFor the past 6 months Davey Thompson has attended every meeting of his local feminist group. With passionate speeches he has denounced the evils of the male gender and held…