I'm so sorry but this story is terrible on so many levels for so many reasons. The tenses are so mixed and erratic, the mechanism is all wrong, some syntax errors. And what's up with the first part about teachers name, so irrelevant and incongruous.
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@rasamuel, I understand that constructive feedback does not need to be a positive one. It would have helped if you had picked out the part with wrong syntax and bad tenses. I appreciate all constructive feedback as most of us are learning. I am not a professional author with loads of editors on my payroll.
FYI: the story contains some humor and as most things in life do not come all packaged to perfection.
Regards,
@greenrun
(author)
Yes, there are errors in the story. I hope it did not completely obliterate the moral of the story from your view. Were you able to finish reading it? These would have to be corrected in another post. All the best.