@rascalblack - don't beat yourself up. Everything starts with a thought in our minds, then we need the courage to act on it.
The fact that you are ONLY 25 & have already questioned the world we live in AND you once worked for the gov't, speaks volumes.
I'm proud of you for having your eyes WIDE open despite having been in the Air Force, so kudos to you.
Have you already joined a lot of homesteading groups & channels on FB & YT?
While I don't recommend FB or YT, b/c they have the largest community/following, it's a good idea to start there & try to move them over to steemit or search for them on here once you know their username.
Be well.