Welcome to Beastly Tales. Each has a message, a moral. All are meant to have an element of humour. Naturally, any names included do not depict real folk but are included as part of the joke.
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(As with Beastly Banter Beastly Tales is written and illustrated by Richard Hersel.)
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Richard Hersel
BEASTLY TALES
THE CAMPANOLOGIST
The sound of ringing bells was music to Millie’s ears,
Every time she heard them, they brought her cheers.
She had to walk past the bell tower, into town,
So one day she stopped, with a quizzical frown.
“I should go inside this campanile to see,”
“What the inside story of bell ringing might be.”
And so that is indeed what she did.
Taking those stairs to where the bell ringers hid.
There were four of them, looking with hope,
Towards their respective bell pull rope.
She asked the older gent, in a tremulous voice,
If she could have a try, if there was a choice.
“So would you like to be a campanologist, my dear?”
“We can surely instruct you, never you fear.”
“Come in and stand just in front of me,”
“And we’ll have you bell ringing before time for tea.”
So Millie stood with her back to the wall,
And the long bell rope, before her, did fall.
The older gent, whose name was Pervice,
Stood closely behind her, making her nervous.
In fact, he stood so very, very close,
That the proximity seemed to be gross.
He seemed to be both excitable and frisky,
And he emitted a strong aroma of whiskey.
“My dear,” said he as he covered her hands,
“I’ll help you, initially, to pull the bell bands.”
“You’ll soon ‘get to know the ropes’ so to speak.”
“And then my hands may go elsewhere to seek.”
With that he guided her hands to tug very hard,
And the bell rope flopped against it’s guard.
“As a campanologist, you’re a natural, my dear,”
“Although you require much more practice with me near.”
“If you would care to come back tonight,”
“I’ll see to your training, see you all right.”
Now Millie was thinking, “He has been drinking,”
“Of whiskey or Gin, he was stinking.”
There was no way she was coming back,
Pervice was so grubby, full of tack.
“Tonight I’m travelling to see grand mother,”
“But, another time I could return with my big brother.”
“He is most protective of me, and I’ve a hunch,”
“He may well decide to give you a punch!”
Now Pervice said, “Really my dear,”
“Of me you should have no fear.”
“You are undoubtedly a beautiful belle,”
“And I have so many things, to you, I could tell.”
“But it seems that our dalliance is not to be.”
“Undoubtedly, I must have Bats in my Belfry!”
“Although I’m partial to cute little dolls,”
“I seem to be the one for whom The Bell Tolls!”
this your poem is the demonstration that it is always better to hear two bells than one! And to play them in two we need to have a good agreement ....
Great painting of yours. Thank you.
What a mischievous Pervice, hope you didn't coin the name from pelvis, thinking out loud, welldone
I love it!. Great tale.
Verry funny and clever,
and pervice seemed a perverted fellow,
covered in wisky and a stench to frown on
the rope was his life, this is all he new off,
since 7 he trained and forewent,
his childhood he did lament,
his passion for the rope, had lost all hope,
he desired a family and to open a shop,
but each day and year passed
And he turned to his bottle and flask,
a sacrifice was made, and went unnoticed,
until millie showed, and his enthusiasm blossomed.
Reading your poems is quite the education! Firstly I had to google what campanology is, so I just learned something new. Secondly Pervice was such a creep, I kind of wish the bell swung back and knocked him out. It would have been the perfect ending.😁
Sounds good to me, I should rewrite it.
Read it over and over. This mastery of the pen. I duff my hat. Great work.
Pervice tgough..