Guidance on Communicating Wisely

in #blog6 months ago

Good day Teacher David,

I would like some guidance.

I have this opportunity to be an independent care giver, apart from an agency. There are some benefits to this position. Same client, consistent work schedule, allows more time for personal and education, and increase in pay. The changes would be an increase in travel time, ware and take on 14 year old car, gas, client vacations a month in October, going from a weekly pay period to monthly.

I have calculated a certain monetary value of what it would cost me to make this change. Client had offered a certain dollar amount and schedule. I concluded that what the client offered was enough to cover the changing cost and a little more. Since this acceptance the client has requested reduced hours, change in shift hours, change in days and I have accommodated all of them. Now the client is requesting a reduction in hours and a shift change again.

If I accept at the reduction I’ll maybe break even for the change cost and reduce personal and educational time. I would like to advise the client that accepting another change would not be beneficially wise for me, and maybe she might be better off finding someone closer to her.

I enjoy caring for this client and I know it’s difficult to find caregivers but I don’t think those are valid reasons to accept.

Thank you, Teacher David.


Teacher David replies.

Hello Marci…sure, I will help you.

Yes, you could choose to do that and using Right Intention, Right Speech, and Right Action will surely help you.

There is no harm in communicating these kinds of things. You will just need to be sure to practice well, and even with that, remember that the client could potentially still become upset.

If their mind has craving/desire/attachment, they could become angry, frustrated, agitated, irritated, annoyed, etc. But, you are not causing that. You cannot control whether someone else becomes discontent or not. But, you can practice in a way that they are less likely to become discontent.

Practicing Right Intention and Right Speech in this situation, and all others, will provide an individual’s mind less opportunity to become discontent but, they might still become discontent if they have craving/desire/attachment in the mind.

You will need to look at each situation closely, take your time, gather your thoughts, and communicate what you need to communicate in a wise way.

Sometimes in situations like this, it can be better to communicate in writing as it will take some of the potential emotion out of it and give the individual time to think it over outside of direct contact with you. This can help their mind to acclimate to the impermanence they are experiencing.

With the unEnlightened mind craving permanence, they will potentially need time to adjust to the impermanence they are experiencing. Having the opportunity to do that outside of contact with you, will oftentimes help them tremendously. And, it can also help you to communicate more clearly, concisely, and precisely, thus, producing the best results.

Also, by doing it in writing, you could share it with someone you trust and have confidence in who knows Right Speech that could provide you guidance in whether or not you are fully practicing Right Speech (i.e. Right Communication) in the written communication.

That way, you have the best opportunity for the communication to produce wholesome results (i.e. wholesome Kamma).

Then, once you put something like this out into the world, observe the results coming back to you. The Natural Law of Kamma is going to be the very best and most unbiased Teacher. If there are areas for improvement or, even if things went well, learn from that and cultivate the needed wisdom for future situations that are similar.

In this way, you are making gradual progress through the continuous cultivation of wisdom in each situation and experiences you are having.

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