My expectations were reduced to zero, Do not fear failure but rather fear not trying. The only problem is that the lives they make sense of are other people's lives, never your own. Everything since then has been a bonus. The one who falls and gets up is stronger than the one who never tried. I'm not surprised some people prefer books. I know it's not easy for you, living this life, Books make sense of life. you're not the only one with troubles. Beliefs are choices. First you choose your beliefs. Then your beliefs affect your choices. We all of us have our particular devil who rides us and torments us, and we must give battle in the end. We make all sorts of assumptions because we don't have the courage to ask questions. I suppose sooner or later in the life of everyone comes a moment of trial.
note.With respect,
Your lessons have been very insightful and fun!