Oh shit, one last thing. If you are jerking off to porn STOP THE PRESSES. Stop jerking off to porn for a week and I BET you that you are becoming the fucking Einstein of how to make your wife love you and fuck you. This isn't about morality or any of that shit. If you're watching porn there's almost nothing else we have to talk about. Your BRAIN doesn't know it's watching porn. It thinks you're having sex with 10s and then it looks at your wife and sees a 6. Quitting porn should be step #1. In fact, if you are a porn watcher, that is probably doing you more harm than weed. At least weed is giving you and your wife something to bond over.
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@andarchy Well thank you for the feedback I'm not sure my relationship is really that bad and I may have made out to seem like its worse then it is so I apologize if I have. We'll definitely look into our options because so far you've been spot on so maybe there are things there we just don't see and couples therapy has never hurt anything. The porn thing isn't really a issue we have a very active sex life so no time for porn lol. Again thank you for the feedback!
Oh well that's good! About the sex that is. Unfortunately what that means is that the source of your problem is something other than porn. One of the problems people have is that they think that if they're "managing" something, it's fine. You are looking at your relationship and going, "Well the relationship is fine, therefore, it's not a big deal." First of all, your relationship will be "fine" right up until the moment it is "not fine." So the fact that it is fine is totally irrelevant. The titanic was fine right up until the moment it struck the iceberg. I am not looking at your relationship to determine whether your relationship is ok, I'm looking at your substance abuse (BTW I smoke weed about every other day, so I actually have personal knowledge of the substance and using it habitually). That's how I was able to know so much about your relationship without knowing anything about you. Once you stop feeling the need to stop smoking weed, then I'll believe you when you say your relationship is fine. But right now, I'm sorry to say, you are certainly in no position to evaluate your own relationship. Now, I'm not saying your relationship is "awful" or "doomed" that's the whole point. You want to turn the ship around before it gets to that point. Your weed consumption is a symptom. It's a signal. It's telling you, "Hey, something is not right in your life." Everyone who has commented on this thread talking about tricks they used to stop consuming a substance have not solved their real problems. That's why many of them talk about their continued struggle. They haven't solved the problem obviously. I'm telling you that the weed is a signal that you are heading toward an iceberg and you're going, yeah but we're still going forward. Um, yeah. Congrats. There's a reason why the divorce rate is so high and that is exemplified by many of the responses in this post. Most people still do not understand the real sources of substance abuse and how to maintain healthy relationships. Instead, as always, they look for cheap tricks and quick fixes. The fix is actually quite easy though, you just have to abandon your ego, seek professional help and guidance and open yourself up to your mate. My guess is that right now you are primarily governed by fear. You're afraid to see a therapist. You're afraid to go out and meet new people. You're afraid that if you and your wife separate it will be bad for your kids (it will be). What you need to understand is that these fears will create a self-fulfilling prophecy if you don't conquer them ASAP. You will not receive the help you need. You will not meet new people. Your children will be raised in an unhealthy environment. There is no chance I'm wrong. Humans aren't that hard to predict. That's how I make money actually (investing).