cartoon-off contest, of which I am his resident stick-figure artist and also COM, because who doesn't love efficient multi-tasking?This is a mish-mash of comedy. Mostly it's my entry into both @corpsvalues very fun
A Cartoon
Let's take an informal poll down in the comments... how long do you save your cards? I slowly built up a huge pile of them until one day I just decided to throw them out after reading them. Callous? I don't care. But apparently my wife does. So we compromised and now we keep all our cards forever.
A Caption
The excellent and aforementioned @corpsvalues provides an image each week for his contest, and has everyone come up with a caption. Here's this week's, which is actually courtesy of @lildebbiecakes
Source
When she accidentally threw away her social security check, Mrs. Goldstein was forced to turn to E-Sports in a desperate attempt at earning some extra money.
A Meme
Those all actually belonged to a roommate I used to live with. This happened each week.
A Story
Once when I was working at a restaurant, I accidentally threw away something pretty important, though now I can't remember what it was, exactly. I had taken the trash out to the huge dumpster out back when I saw whatever this important object was tumble in as I was emptying a huge garbage can. I had to jump into the dumpster and look around, and I remember being terrified the entire time because there was a compactor built into the dumpster. I was afraid it would spontaneously turn on with me inside. But it would have been kind cool to re-enact a scene from Star Wars in my final moments I guess.
This was my entry for Round 36 of the Comedy Open Mic contest. I nominate @fromage and @blanchy.
@DollarsAndSense is a father, veteran, participant in the rat race, freelance writer, and volunteer EMT. He also tries to be funny sometimes. Hey, want to play Cards Against Humanity on Steemit?
Cryptos Against Humanity - Week 8
Unless otherwise noted, all text and pictures in this post are my own and may not be reused without my permission.
Animation By @zord189, Dividers By @jaynie Join us @steemitbloggers
Hi dollarsandsense,
This will determine your ultimate position when the results are tallied. (That being said, you are free to adopt any position you wish - we can recommend pantsless with beer in hand.)Thank you for your entry in to #comedyopenmic comedy contest. We have asked the judges below to review your entry and give it a funny rating. (They generally have no sense of humor, as the saying goes, those that can't do, start contests and judge).
Judges:
If you have any questions or queries please feel free to contact one of the judges or come say hi in discord: Click Here
Thank you to @matytan for the great banner @ComedyOpenMic For Witness And Disrupt The Steem Blockchain With Laughter!
Had a compactor when I worked at a grocery store. Was terrified of losing a hand in the thing. Had to pry boxes out of the top of it when they got stuck by standing in it...
Baler? I hardly know her!
Quite...and the wires...ugh.
HAHA, both your cartoon and caption made me LOL. For me I have a one month window where a card from someone no matter how dear gets to live on the refrigerator. After that, if the baby hasn't gotten ahold of it or it hasn't been turned into a shopping list, then to the trash it goes. If you spent more than 2.00 on it.... well why would you do that.
I'm still lol'ing over the look of dismay on your stick figure's face and granny esports....
:D glad I can still get laughs even with stick figures :P
The "month" policy is pretty sound. Maybe I'll try and convince her to change.
Yeah, I keep old cards in a side drawer in the kitchen, pretty much only opened to put in more cards. We also keep various invitations in there.
There are thousands at this point
10/10 would buy home with physics-bending kitchen drawer again.
Oh, most definitely. Still, it appears to have limits, especially considering the fact that it's almost full right now, might have to go to the back and toss out a couple old ones.
I definitely keep my cards forever especially the ones that have such a special message and from special friends lol memories :) hahah this is funny.
LOL! "We compromised and now we keep all our cards forever"!!! I tend to throw as soon as I can get away with it. My wife is a forever card keeper. Love the cartoon and memes!
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Now I open the card, read, take a picture of it and then throw it away. For the same reason, of course, my wife treats them as though they’re a set of car keys.
Hey now, the picture idea is interesting!
Hey I didn’t mean to be such a butthole and leave out the part about I was laughing the whole way through! “Great entry / good luck” is definitely what I meant to say but I was probably laughing too much because I’ve walked the exact same steps over the same lame birthday, anniversary, johnny’s 1st birthday party, someone’s wedding who I don’t even know, and... and...
Haha no worries, thanks for the clarification though 🙂
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haha! very funny sir dollarsandsense! My wife throws all cards away almost immediately and I keep them forever unless she finds them and throws them away!
Haha great cartoon. I am a little guilty of collecting things myself and then not clearing anything away for a long time! Interesting compromise you have there, I guess that can be considered a "good deal" from your wife's point of view 😉
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Forever doesn't sound like a compromise to me lol
Keeping cards, such as gift cards, is always a dilemma. I used to hang on to them, only to throw them away after they piled up. Now I almost always just toss them since there is no reason to store them for ultimate disposal.
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Duh.
Send those cards to someone else.
$$ prawfeet baby cha ching $$
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