Well yesterday I had a pop at the Krauts. Right now I expect they're polishing up the Panzers ready to invade me. They've been quiet for too long. Something's going on. You can't trust them. You can't go wrong when you open with industrial strength xenophobia can you. I'm a bit worried I've upset them of course. After all they aren't the French are they. What are the Frogs going to do if they take offense? Go on strike? The Germans can be a bit nasty though. They tend not to lay down their weapons at the first sign of danger. I really must stop attacking these easy targets. What's happened to me? I used to be bad and now I'm abysmal. Knob gags, toilet humor, insulting the French and Germans. Soft targets all of them. I think I need to get back to my roots and go on repetitively about the Good Old Days. Only thanks to early onset senility I've forgotten most of them. I'm old enough to remember when The Simpsons were funny you know. When TV produced a few good programs. Personally I think entertainment went to shit when high definition came in. Now we've got 4K and 8K is on the way. It's like they lost all direction when they could go, look at these stunning pictures, fuck a decent narrative and a good plot. Movies have gone the same way. It's all style and zero content these days.
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But it's not all bad. Thanks to the dearth of any real creativity any prick with a laptop can write a script. A rotting fence post can get its own series on Hulu, Amazon or Netflix. You don't need talent when any old shit will do and no one has an attention span that lasts more than 15 seconds. Oh damn now I can't remember if I've had a shit today. I'll have to go back over the toilet tapes. I know I had a shower first thing, but after that it gets fuzzy.
That's one of the few problems with the Good Old Days. You reach a point in your life when you're too old to remember them. Until a reminder comes along like the coronavirus. Then I can think back to polio epidemics and measles killing thousands of children every year. You knew where you were with pandemics back then. Generally you were either dead or permanently disabled.
With the benefit of age it's possible to look back. At all those different people you voted for in elections. That's when you suddenly realize that every single one of them provided solutions that were worse than the problems. That's Democracy for you. You get to decide which prick fucks everything up for you. Be grateful. There are people who have no say in the matter. They don't get to choose who ruins their lives.
Way back then, when TV and movies were made by people with an imagination, the candy was a lot bigger. Babies were to. When I was a lad they were the size of hot air balloons. They didn't float though. Ego's were huge as well. Not like the ones they've got today. In the 1960's if you came across an ego you had to make a detour to get round it. Often involving weeks of travel, oxygen and sherpas.
Well the Grim Reaper has just tapped me on the shoulder. Reminding me that we're going out tonight, collecting souls. I kill them, he collects them. I don't know what he does with them. Best not to ask really. Why spoil something so perfect? Our relationship that is. He's been my constant companion since my very first drug fuelled killing spree.