I always have a problem starting a post. For example I started this post by saying just that not knowing where the next line would lead me. Usually I pick a random topic and a random celebrity and talk about one while throwing random jabs at the other. But this time is different, although Drake has become such a hypocritical dick lately.
I live currently with roommates and one of them shares the room with me. Which is why I’m writing this at the break of dawn as I can’t sleep even though I’m tired as this is where the guy is sleeping.
Now you might be thinking “okay, why don’t you just sleeping on his bed” well mainly because this is his bed.
I’m not used to sleeping on other people’s bed and I wasn’t going to start on one with a cover that looks like this
You’d think you’ve seen it all then a cover that’s turning into a mold comes your way.
I’m not exactly having the most fun couple of weeks. For starter, the skin on my cheeks are starting to weirdly develop on my face
At first I thought it was punishment for not committing to the no nut November, and I figured it will wear off eventually. I mean how bad can it be really? I did end up checking it out eventually, and after paying around 30$ to have it checked out and spending around 5 hours waiting the best Iraqi doctor told me “it’s a lack of blood, probably..... maybe” he did the “diagnosing” while staring at some papers he was holding in his hands, which is weird because I hadn’t fill out any. I asked him if that was the only option but he said it could also be a tumor developing but it was, again, probably lack of blood. Which is really why someone would go to a doctor, to get that “probably” from them in a non-caring tone. Anyway I left the hospital with what I estimate to be 20-25% chance of having a deadly disease. Actually comes to think about it, I probably got this purple skin because of whatever that is on that cover, I mean look at this.
I took public transportation in my way back home and usually those don’t really fully stop for you to hop on into them. While I was hopping in my left shoe slipped out and I couldn’t pick it up before the bus moved and the driver wouldn’t stop. I remembered an old thing I heard and decided to throw out the other shoe so at least someone would have the pair, it felt good doing that. Well, until it turned out that some good person picked the first shoe and caught up to the bus and threw it through the window to render me throwing the other shoe useless and hit me right in the face. Which I guess is a lesson of sort, or not. I’m dying soon probably so it doesn’t really matter.
My roommate is one crazy person, you see the whole mess in the pictures above. Those are all his clothes. The worst part is that’s he’s a sleepwalker and talker and sometimes puncher. Which is anothe possibility to add to what caused the purple color on my skin. The thing about the guy in general is that he’s the definition of lazy, like lazy with a purpose of being lazy. When we were in school before he used to spend every single class drawing on his notebook. However, during art class which is when he’s supposed to draw he’d spend it writing on the notebook instead. He’s also a bit unlucky to be fair. Few weeks ago we had the water motor, which is a device we use when the water is low. Anyway while almost everyone in the building was checking the security footage, we came across footage of him masturbating under the stairs. Which is a habit he gained due to the fact that it’s almost impossible to do that while living with so many flat mates. Unlucky for him we weren’t sure which day it was stolen so we watched him masturbate several times while he was sitting next to us.
I nominate @belemo and @anouk.nox so they stop nominating me.
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man, that almost made me throw up fuck .. just throw it away and let him sleep on that bed and under the blanket without a cover.. jezus christ how can you even let that "thing" enter your room? It looks like it's going to attack you any moment .. Thanks for the nomination, I may have just gotten some nasty inspiration from looking at these pictures.. hopefully you aren't dying though ;)
When an alt replies by mistake haha
Lol, no pasa nada!
I'm not as used to this as @doomsdaychassis :)
That's what she said
And that is how you end up with a bunch of orphans.
A little bit of orphan parenting advice.
You will make a great mom
I have great birthing hips.
That is disgusting. I have had some horrible filthy roommates like that. It sucks. I got on one roommate's ass because he was a lazy slob and he told me to "fuck off, you aren't my mom" So I open hand bitch slapped him and told him that if I was his mother I would have aborted him with a coathanger now clean your shit up. Amazingly, his slobbish habits changed overnight. Something his real mother could not accomplish in 19 years. I got an amazing laugh about the Fapper under the stairs. That is dedication right there.
lmao I'd pay you to be my life coach.
Geez. Real pictures?
Probably photoshopped.
They were worse before.
Yup. All uploaded right from the phone.
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Did you guys lost the water motor or something?
Start a new trend, attach a bicycle to a pump, and tell your friends to take turn jerking off while riding in privacy to pump the water.