In England we often quote a line from Mark Twain, “If you don't like the weather, wait a few minutes. It was actually written about New England, a different continent entirely. I've since discovered that weather is contrary the world over and England doesn't have the sole claim to it. Last Friday, here in South Australia, we were given a teaser of spring weather, with temperatures reaching 27°C (80.5°F). The following day it not only rained, it hailed! The first time I was told that we'd had hail here in SA, I didn't believe them, because it was well above freezing point. I soon learnt that 8°C (46.5°F) is plenty cold enough for hail. South Australian weather was quick to teach me,
“Your weather ain't special Pom!”
I lived in England until ten years ago when we first set foot in South Australia. We arrived at the start of winter and everything was green and wet, just like England. It wasn't anything like I'd imagined after watching Crocodile Dundee. The grass was growing, there were flowers everywhere. This climate wasn't so tough! Winter turned to spring and in September we got a 30°C (86°F). Now that was finally something to talk about. Still, we didn't really get any scorching days as we headed into summer, like the locals kept promising. The second to last month of summer was coming to a close and finally, on Australia day, we got warm enough for a water fight! Our excitement lasted until the following day, the first day back at school after the summer holidays. Adelaide hit a temperature record of 47.5°C,(117.5°F) meaning further north, where we were, it hit 49°C (120°F). Where we live now would have been 50°C (122°F)! That taught us cocky Poms!
I started volunteering at the school shortly after, because their air-conditioning was better than ours.
Our dry climate means that you can supposedly knock about 10°C off the temperature to get an idea of the heat feel for humid Old Blighty. England's record top temperature was 37.5°C (99.5°F) and that was a population reducer! People were keeling over everywhere. Imagine 40°C (104°F) there; that would be total annihilation!
Arriving in winter, it didn't occur to me why the most popular car colour here was white or silver. So we bought a sleek black car. In summer it doubles up as a bbq and we can cook on the bonnet (that's the hood for any American speakers). I'm thinking of naming it Barbie, then we can say, “Chuck another shrimp on the barbie!”
I've since learnt a bit more about Aussies. First off, most of them aren't Mick (Crocodile) Dundee, because they mostly live in cities. Country Aussies are tough, they have to be, but city Aussies are generally as soft as all city slickers. Some of them wear shorts all year round, because they are so used to air conditioning winter actually feels warm to them. They're scared of pretty much all animals, because it's common knowledge that everything's trying to kill you here. Hubby, @realtreebivvy, caught a stingray at the beach one Christmas and the young lifeguards were enthusiastically warning the curious kids to stay away, because it could bite them and kill them like Steve Irwin!
Country Aussies are a different breed. They all live in tin sheds to toughen them up. It's a fridge in winter and a furnace in summer. When they have exams, not only do they have to pass them, they have to try not to pass out in the furnaces they sit them in. I think it's an initiation trial as they reach adulthood. If you can survive the exams you can survive the outback.
Driving is completely different in Aussie culture too. In England if you want to change lanes you check for a gap, then indicate to let the car in the other lane know that you plan to change lanes. They respond to this signal by easing off to let you move safely into that lane. In Australia indicating is a signal to the car in the other lane that you think they need to close the gap between themselves and the car in front. They are always quick oblige. If you actually want to change lanes you should check for a safe gap, match your speed to the cars in that lane, then indicate and swiftly pull into that space, both at the same time.
I nominate @galenkp again, because I just can't resist, and @nonsowrites, when he gets a bit of time.
The driving scenario is looking the same in England now. I think they removed the indicators from all the cars too.
They probably don't work, but they can't risk using them and the police seeing, because they can't afford to get them fixed. ;)
this is all so true XD country aussie is different to city aussie
as a city aussie i have to say that your description is 100% accurate of city aussies
XD
really nice post, @minismallholding <3
I'm a small town girl, so halfway between the two!
It's funny for me that you live in Adelaide since most of what I know about Australia comes from reading the comic satirical work of Adelaide ex-pat David Thorne who has a direct link to my funny bone.
http://www.27bslash6.com/
(his work is also published in print)
So, hearing you talk about it in a similar manner to the way that he does just makes me think that Australia is even more of a hilarious place than it probably is. I'm pretty sure that it is most likely just a difficult place to live and there are some people that can turn that into comedy gold =D
And just so you know, the method of turn signal use you describe is exactly how it is done in the states. In the most aggressive driving zones (inner cities) turn signals are used to notify the person that like it or not, you are pulling over so they had better move.
I hadn't heard of David Thorne before. Thanks for the link. The disclaimer already had me giggling.
The Aussie sense of humour can be pretty rough around the edges. I like it! It does run along the lines of, "you've got to laugh or you'll cry" though. I watched a zombie movie made here recently and it had me in stitches when an aboriginal guy accidentally kills a none zombie.
Driving is every man for himself in some places! I can't believe how many accidents I've seen since moving here. Fatals are commonplace, yet I never personally encountered one in the UK. At 14 or 15 my eldest ended up seeing her first mangled body, which was a first for me too, at that time.
Hi minismallholding,
Thank you for your entry in to #comedyopenmic comedy contest. We have asked the judges below to review your entry and give it a funny rating. (They generally have no sense of humor, as the saying goes, those that can't do, start contests and judge).
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Thank you to @matytan for the great banner
I lost it on this line hahaha.
Seems Australia has some similarities with Nigeria. Lol.
Thanks for the nomination. I will give it a try. Is there a theme I can follow?
No theme. The entry rules are here.
https://steemit.com/comedyopenmic/@comedyopenmic/4pmdkb-comedy-open-mic-round-rules
They'll be starting round 32 soon.
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STOPI remember being a little kid and my uncle going to the outback to meet a bunch of people from an archery magazine he used to submit stories to.
When he brought back photos of a bunch of dudes drinking beer in their underwear on their porch, I thought they were a bunch of weirdos but he said it was so hot in their shack it was cooler to sit under an awning outside.
This was in the late 70s or early 80s so I don't imagine there was a lot of AC anywhere.
No, not much aircon then; certainly not in the country. Sleeping under wet towels in summer was a good tip I got from a country raised gal.
Haha, outside in their undies! All I can think of is mozzie bait!!