Although you may have heard someone tell you that you're unique and no one else is like you, this statement is only partially true.
You see, we all think differently from one another but there are many of us in this world that are dealing with the same problems. I for one struggled with depression and anxiety for 2.5 years and I thought I was alone. I thought no one else was going through what I'm going through and no one understood me. But because we are all different and yet our problems are similar in nature, I understand what other people are feeling and what it's like to experience their symptoms.
I know what it's like to turn down fun plans just so I could stay in bed and try to deal with the thoughts in my head. Or to have someone's words just break you down in an instant. Even when people think it's hard to hide your depression it actually becomes quite of a natural state. I used to go to school with a fake smile on my face only to come back home and mope in my bed.
Maybe you've experienced things differently then I have, and that's okay because the underlying problem will always be the same in people who are depressed. The reason one has become depressed might differentiate but the root of the problem and how it affects each of us is always the same.
Having said all of this, I know what it's like to be in your shoes. I know what it's like to experience traumatic events and live through them without telling anyone. I know most of it but I might not know it all. For that reason, I write this post. I want to use my knowledge and first-hand experiences to help you deal with what I had to go through.
Continue to read to find out how I dealt with my problems and how you can too.
I tried everything, and maybe you have too or your friend who's depressed has. 10 different pills, talking to someone, seeing a therapist, nothing is working. And chances are, none of that will work. You see, how I conquered my depression and anxiety was by myself. I didn't take any pills, or went to talk to a professional, I completely changed my life by myself.
So you're thinking how did I do it? How can you replicate what I did for your benefit?
It's quite easy to explain and talk about however the hard part is the initiative you must take in order to get better. (This was my biggest struggle) I was so unmotivated that I didn't even bother to try helping myself. I knew that hanging out with friends and being social always helps but I refused to even go out and ask someone to hangout.
It took me 2 years to figure this out and it took me half of a year to help heal myself. IMPORTANT: You see, depression and other problematic states will not and can not be cured/healed in a matter of days or even weeks.
Sidenote* Depression controls the way you think and therefore to change the way you think, takes time and routine conditioning.
I didn't know this at first, which was why I was struggling. You have to be able to endure through the healthy conditioning of your mind in order to see results.
So everyday, I meditated. And WAIT before you skip over this, I highly recommend you read this because it's truly what helped me. And no its not this kind of meditating...
The kind of meditating I did was solely for the intention of self-healing. You HAVE to, HAVE to be 100% ready to change your life and if you don't want that or you don't want your depression or mental states to go away then this will not work for you.
Anyway, I sat down everyday in my desk chair and stared out the window at the trees at my house and I just thought. I didn't think about my current state or my current well-being, I thought about my childhood and memories from it. In doing this we are trying to connect your mental state back to when you were depression free. Overtime these mediation sessions lead me to pull-out old photos from my childhood and listen to old songs. This soon turned my mind into thinking back to when I was worry free. In time I came to this conclusion: I started to realize that my depression was actually a gift. YES you heard me right, A GIFT! :)
You see, in the years I spent in that mental state, it gave me a whole new outlook on life, and for those views on things I'm grateful. I'm grateful I can see the positives in everything, just like I did when I was a child. Depression and Anxiety are states, let me remind you. Let's look at the word state. (I'm from Iowa by the way Go hawks!) Not that state though :). The state I'm talking about is having to do with a certain point on a timeline. i.e. "You're at the adulthood state of your life." See what kind of state I'm referring to?
Adding on to this, these are just states, points of time in your whole lifetime. They will pass trust me, you will change for the better because of it. Like I said I'm blessed to have been depressed. I should use that as a slogan. "Blessed to have been depressed." The outcome is so much greater than you can imagine. I use to think my life was forever ruined by all those bad days and bad times but those were what opened my eyes up to see how much the good times are actually valued at. And that right there, those words I just said are why I'm blessed.
I'm blessed because I experienced the bad and now I get to appreciate the good. "Normal People," those I consider to always have been in a good mental state, don't get the experience you do. They've never been through what you've been through and they don't get to see the good life as great as you will. If you've made it past those bad years then you will know what I mean.
It's worth the time and energy to help yourself get better, you just have to try and see what works for you.
This post was short and too condensed for my liking. Also I apologize about the poor structure, I was in a rush to get this out. I have more tips for you if you want to hear them or I could talk more about my experiences. Nevertheless, I'm here for anyone who wants to talk, feel free to comment below and I'll reply to everyone as best as I can!
I will make another post about this topic so comment suggestions for things you'd like to hear me talk about.
I hope this helped you in some way or form. I'd appreciate the support on this post so those affected by these states can have easier access to it.
Remember that to change you must first change your attitude. Talk to me and tell me what's going on.
Until the next post, thanks for the read, and have an awesome day!
Good work and nice to meet you! I too have experiences with a mood related disorder (BPD).
I have some mixed feelings about this post. On the one hand, I fully appreciate it when anyone speaks out about these kinds of struggles and puts those experiences out there for others who are nervous and feel like they are the only ones going through it. Better to talk about your depression than to let it fester and build into the anxiety of getting nowhere. I also want to congratulate you on having found a solution that works for you.
In fact, this is an impressive feat on your part. When we deal with depression we seek solutions to it, often times turning up empty. Many of the behaviors that are exhibited turn out to be coping mechanisms which in psychological research have been proven to help to a degree. For example, if you feel extreme pain in one part of your body you can lower the overall pain sensation by causing another part of your body to experience pain. In the case of extreme depression where some sufferers turn to cutting, this uses the same mechanism to offset psychological pain with the pain of being cut. That's not a recommendation for cutting AT ALL. I think in most cases pinching should work just as well as an alternative.
In a similar fashion, you independently discovered mindfulness meditation, which is a therapy that's been proven to work. Your therapist should know it as Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT). I was always skeptical and confused about the concept of meditation until I learned mindfulness training in group therapy. I could never get past a sentiment like "try not to think." Luckily, it's way less complicated than that. What you end up doing is focusing on something, like biofeedback or a sensation and spend some time in a third-person point of view thinking about your own thoughts. Sensations, including depression, come and go and are then followed by further sensations. It's been an amazing technique for me to get through the hardest of times. Despite having found it independently, I recommend you mention CBT to your therapist if you can to make sure you have the full backing of what has been proven to work.
The downside to this post I inferred earlier is that along with your personal growth, there is this self-help semi-magical thinking process attached to how you came to find it. When you are the only data point to consider, it's impossible to know with certainty if the cause of your relief from depression is the technique you discovered or if it was some other cause such as human development, hormones, or a new diet. Don't let this criticism discourage you at all from working hard and searching for answers, I'm just advising that you maintain good skepticism and that you clarify that what worked for you will not necessarily work for everyone else.
I personally turn to The Twelve Virtues Of Rationality to inspire critical thinking and reason in everything I do. Thanks for the post! It was a good read.
Thanks for your reply! Just to note, I probably did not make this clear but I myself, did not see a therapist, I was only listing solutions that many of those who are diagnosed might have tried. My fault for bad wording on that but I do agree that it was some form of self-meditation that helped me. Outside variables such as diet, hormones, and development I know were not a factor. (Believe I looked into everything) Anyway to go along with the process and technique I used, it was a meditation I did where I kept asking myself in-depth questions or deep thoughts on the subject matter of why I am depressed. I learned that it's because of my fixed mindset that was causing my depression and since then I have become open minded and free from constraints on subjects. One example is that I was so opinionated and biased on a political issue(I won't name) and I've realized the other side of the spectrum and in doing that I realized the balance in everything and the benefits to being open to anything. I will do another post in the future about this. :) Thanks for reply again!
This is true for many of us thanks for sharing
I'm glad you can relate. It can be hard sometimes and I just want to help everyone who is going through tough times. Thanks for your response :)
Awesome! It's great to see others on this journey through depression. I wrote an article dealing with the same subject. Dopamine receptors are our friends. Welcome to steemit. upvoted, and I'll follow you too.
Thanks! I'll check out that article!