... I'll tread twice cautiously.
My emotions were rumbling....
This tingling feeling that settles at your belly that makes you yearn for more despite the discomfort.
Could this be love? I doubt.
I had had this same feeling when Jackie and I were close friends, when John told me he loved me, and also when I had those late night calls with Stephen.
I, most definitely, cannot be going around bearing love for everyone.
So, what could this feeling be?
Whatever it may be, I am well aware that this feeling comes right before the breakdown in mental health. The struggle between fanning emotions to flame and being a normal, productive teenager.
I stood up from the stump where I sat beside him. Experience has taught me to be wiser, I thought.
"I'll be taking my leave now" I muttered defiantly.
"Already?" His voice betrayed a muffled surprised.
"Yeah! Already" I said, with a bright smile that, I believe, hid my nervousness.
So we sauntered along, out of the clearing. It wasn't a field or anything, it was just a clearing nearby with a few trees scattered here and there. People had for long deserted this place. Probably because they had more important things to occupy themselves with.
I suppose this was why he called this his 'hideout'.
I'd say, for someone who loves nature, this wasn't too bad a choice of a hideout.
"Uhmm.... So we see on Monday?" There was this longing in his eyes that made me want to say 'yes'. He obviously wanted us to hangout more, but I'd had my lessons.
"Oh no. I'll be very busy on Monday and probably most of the week. How about we say, later?"
I knew there was no later, but I hoped he agreed. Leaving with clean slates were more of 'my thing'.
I waved him bye as I rushed home. Hopefully I'd get home before my heart decides to do rebel.