I was never into the idea of having children. Too many things I wanted to do, too many humans already destroying this beautiful planet. A confrontable bummer with my partners if they had ideas about that.
A few events blew in the sail of change. I met the most amazing woman of my life on a free party in the South of Spain. I left my country and went together with her on a wild adventure driving an old 7-ton army truck from Belgium to India.
Most psychological schools say that the choice of a partner has a lot to do with seeing him/her as a good mother/father. My partner was a child therapist and a total anarchist, I felt really confident talking about anything.
I had lots of questions on the topic of children. How can you raise children freely in this ever-imposing society? What defines the generation we desperately need to change the current state of affairs? What values to give?
Very difficult questions… Most beautiful answers… I was ready…
The universe has always listened to my intentions. Never before was I ready. My previous girl-friend lied to me about anti-conception for five years but didn’t get pregnant, phew. She got pregnant soon after we split up, i surely was the one unable to make children.
Here comes the beautiful part. It was in Dubai, Middle East, middle of our way to India. I declared my readiness. My girlfriend had a coil as anti-conception. We decided to remove the coil. Dubai was a bit more medically advanced then India, better to do it there.
Making love with nature’s intention of what love-making is all about, has something out-of-this-world, very powerful. And powerful it was, she got pregnant on that very first night, tell me about the power of intentions!
Our 1st child was born 3 months after we arrived in India on off the Southern beaches of hippie Goa in a place called Agonda. She was given the name of Ula, meaning “Jewel of the Ocean”.
Three years later, in the Himalaya mountains of India, our 2nd child was born. We had an 86-year old local midwife assisting us. She is a story on herself, did more than a 1000 births, knew how to turn our baby by hand etc. It was the last birth she ever assisted and died soon after, another treasure of information lost.
There are different regulations for determining the citizenship of a child. Some countries have “Citizenship by birth”, others have “Citizenship by descent”. India has both and doesn’t allow dual citizenship. We decided to register them with the Belgian Embassy and they both have Belgian passports. The chance of getting stuck on borders, e.g. Pakistan, with Indian passports was too high and Belgium is very relaxed on the schooling level. They have a “learning obligation”, not a “schooling obligation”.
India is such that you could bribe around to get a second certificate with a different name and give your children a second passport from a different country, i.c. India or their mother’s country. The though played in my mind, it would have been a nice present to my children but I didn’t do it, just sharing some ideas…
When children are really small, the only thing you need is time, love and devotion. For them, there is no difference between an old 1967 truck or a king’s palace. We travelled with them to the most beautiful jungles and beaches of India, a beautiful connected experience.
We have been very aware of the ongoing process of our children. Evolving with them, my girlfriend did a kindergarten project in Goa and later a toddler school in Gokarna. Our children developed freely in a safe environment always surrounded by nature.
Children grow fast and our truck soon became too small to host a family of 4 with 2 dogs.
We moved to Karuna Farm, a paradise in the mountains of South-India, on top of the list of the most biodiverse places on Earth. We made ourselves a beautiful cozy home and planned to homeschool our children.
That sounded all wonderful but we had many issues. We raised our children in English but it was not our mother language. After a year or so, the reading/writing progress of our oldest child was very low, a lot of doubts arised whether we were actually capable of getting them to read and write in English.
Being a parent takes up all your time and energy. Nothing wrong with that. I think time and energy are the most valuable things you can give to someone.
Maybe teaching was just too much for us. I could not devote myself full-time. I didn’t like the different kind of parent-child interaction. Homeschooling would take away much of my other parenting role which I valued more. Maybe teaching was just not our thing…
Once again, the universe answered. The most amazing school was a 90 minute astonishing forest walk away from our house. A school based on J Krishnamurti’s principles, http://www.sholaicloaat.org
Krishnamurti stresses values of awareness and nature-bound education. Environmental Studies, Social Studies, Wood work, Mechanics, Gardening, Music, what an amazing topics they had. Math’s and English were also on the program as they were connected to Cambridge in England.
The teachers were mostly very young dynamic super enthusiastic people from Bangalore, the most funky city from India where the green movement Is very big. The classes were small. The school had 2 big holidays in summer and winter which would allow us to make some amazing travels.
The decision was made. Our children were very happy to leave the mountain top and step into this new adventure. Our intention was to pick up homeschooling again as soon as they would master the basics of reading and writing.
Our children joined school after the age of 7. The school was actually a boarding school, they were the only day-schoolers. We started with 3 days a week which soon became 4 upon their own requests. The school has been a very positive experience for our children.
Now our children want to widen their horizon by being more free to move out in the world by themselves. They want more things to do. They want to have neighbors with children to invite over. They want a different experience.
We take it as a compliment for us as parents. The final goal of parenting is to have independent young adults. Very often you see children taking the opposite direction of their parents. That exploring part is what makes man’s evolution.
It is not easy for us to leave the paradise we have found but we will. We will start exploring South Europe next summer. We will do it all over again. Get a new house on wheels and find the next paradise.
Life is change by definition. If you want to live your life, change has to be a part of it.
I am 2 months on Steemit now. I have encountered many passionate, similar-minded brothers and sisters from all over the world and I expect to meet many more. A social platform was never my thing but the universe (read: @eco-alex) clearly presented me Steemit and I do wonder where it will lead to. I am putting my intentions out for the following:
If you live in a nice place in South Europe where nature is not absent and were our children might find what they are looking for, please let us know. We would love to check it out on our coming South-Europe trip.
Maybe you are interested in an off-grid nature experience? We have a most beautiful house in a most beautiful environment with some very beautiful people. What about a house swap?
Take care,
Love
For the most recent ecoTrain Highlights, click this link.
https://steemit.com/nature/@eco-alex/the-best-of-the-ecotrain-highlights-of-the-week-19th-24th-august-more-amazing-posts-brought-together-for-you
Beautiful! :-)
made me almost cry, i have no doubt that you are great parents! I am very lucky knowing you, and i am sorry for not knowing a place for you in south europe. But, i am very confident you will find the right place!
Thanks beautiful one!
I really enjoyed this! You and your family are blessed, and I will follow your adventures with interest. I also can't homeschool due to a lack of patience, but I find many opportunities for learning and discussion can come about in the the situations they find themselves in, in the real world.
Yes @onetree, thank you for commenting, i can't agree more with you. Parenting in the sense of being there and guiding through life experiences is most important. Together learning and discussing real-world situations is the best homeschooling. Another sister found, worth the post :-)
That's beautiful Bub @bubke - I mean - really beautiful !! I also recognize the sweet child in the blue wellingtons :) My goodness, so cute.
Beautiful post! Happily ReSteemed with Gusto! I hope you find paradise wherever you are and that more adventures and new abodes come to your feet! Will do what I can to keep an eye out for such possible exchanges. There is a fellow who is working to make Steemit a viable currency for guesthouses around the world. House swapping is even better!!! let's do it! Dream the Dreams, they will wake in Reality if you shake them hard enough!
I start to have the feeling that all these promises of altcoins are simply being executed on the Steem blockchain, one-by-one. I just can not follow all new stuff and changes anymore, will just get myself some more Steem i guess, HF20 is also super promising! Thanks for the comment ecoknowyou
that the way!!!! fun and easy here!
my pleasure, bubcake
Great story! Happy to have come by. Following you X much love to you and your family! Karuna farm sounds amazing. Would love to visit one day.
What a wonderful story @bubke, it's amazing that your power of intention worked after the first try ;) and that you were blessed with a child. It funny how life turns out, I think we know when we meet the One.
Your journey is filled with adventures and life lessons, I am so glad you found such a wonderful school for you children so they could flourish.
I have met a lot of parents who live like us and they all say that when the children get to around 12 that they start to tell us want they really want.
Thank you for sharing this wonderful story with us, it makes us happy to see that it works :)
Bless.
Yes @markwhittam, there is a change at +10, better get ready :-) I love following your posts doing the big family on wheels thing, brings back sweet memories and at the same time future visions :-) I think the most important reason my children want change is because there are no other children around our house. We had another beautiful family with 3 children living with us in Karuna Farm and they moved to Goa where there is a lot more action. We might just move there next year as well, children need children!
@bubke I am so sorry I never went to check on your blog. Now that I have, I'm deeply touched by your wonderful post on your children. You are such an amazing man, husband and father! You really allowed the Universe to help you on your life journey. Having children because you want to is the greatest joy one can have. Children have a way of making one even more real. They are loved and give the love back ten fold. What an amazing feeling.
I am so glad you found a wonderful school for the children. Experiencing nature is a fantastic experience for them. I am so happy for you Bubke. Wishing you and your family much love and happiness!!! :D
@cabbagepatch, you surprise me every time with your uplifting positivity. It is a general trend on Steemit but many times it has to do with building out the personal profile, making new followers etc. I know this is absolutely not true for your comments and I truly appreciate that. I am glad to have met you here on Steemit, much love and light.
@bubke I always gravitate to certain types of people who are truly real, grounded and not afraid to be who they are. You are one of them and I honor your friendship, honesty & spirit. You really do things with good intentions which I love. I also love that you can sense what is true and what is not. I really am happy that you found someone who is special to share your life with and start a loving family. It warms my heart deeply. Thank-you! :D
@bubke
There are posts that are good, some are great and some that I try my best to give it a chance, but alas cannot finish.
There are few posts that capture my attention and keep me on my toes, so to say. I don't know if it's the way you write or that the question you have asked yourself I did so myself, but I loved every part of it.
I do not have a tip but I will follow/upvote and resteem and send you some good vibes.
So happy to read your comment @szuri. I would post everyday if i was out on tips and lifting myself on Steemit. I am sharing some experiences on Steemit because there are a lot of cool different thinking people out here and i see a beautiful community helping each other on the less travelled path. Much love and thanks for the resteem.
Hello - thanks so much for sharing your story. I don't ave kids but would like them and am already mentally juggling how I would prefer to go about the raising and education process. Travelling in a campervan and doing at least some home schooling seems like a very interesting (albeit challenging) option. It's very interesting to hear how your own story turned out. I don't have a house in the south of Europe but I do have a base in Ireland if you pass by there :) Happy travels! (ps: followed)
Hi @kate-m, thanks for your comment, nice to meet you. You can juggle as much as you want, kids will defiitely throw your life over :-) As i said in my post, whether it is a campervan or a castle, home or normal schooling, they just need (all) your love and attention. And that comes very naturally, the rest is irrelevant and dependant on what comes on your path. Just be careful not to fall in the Italian lover trap after seeing this Brooklyn movie or you can do it all by yourself :-) Love
Ha. the Italian love trap - I shall try my best to avoid that one!
I was delighted to read this story and see that so many of dreams were able to come true in this heavenly abode of ours. It sadden me to no end to think that someday you and your lovely family might not be here.... but Life has a funny way of working out. As John Lennon once said "Life is what happens when you are busy making other plans"
Know you are a dream manifester! never stop believing in the power of intention!
Har Har MahaDev!
@tilak
......I mean, Karuna Farm, lovely day ;)
@Tilak, you surprise me with your beautiful English :-) We follow the children and will come back when ready, that is if you are still around there off course :-)
'When children are really small, the only thing you need is time, love and devotion. For them, there is no difference between an old 1967 truck or a king’s palace.' ......now that is the truth my friend. I don't have children but I babysit a lot and....you are correct. It's refreshing to hear your story about giving your children a great life. All these sad stories coming out of Sweden and Europe of children being taken away from their parents because they want to home school are mind boggling. I wish your family the best as you move towards southern Europe.
The number of beautiful souls here on Steemit seems unendless, thanks for your nice comment, i see i might have given you some inspiration for your 'don't care how big your house is' post which is absolutely stunningly nice by the way, nice to meet you @josephmcconnell
Yes, for sure you did. All the best @bubke
I finally remembered to come back and read this! So glad I did. These wandering lifestyles amaze me. And I envy you but at the same time am fully aware it's not exactly the choice for me. I commend you for paying attention to your children's needs and realizing you had your limits as teachers. I completely agree with what you said about the different dynamics involved while playing teacher vs parent. Good luck to you in your search. I bet some Boulder people would swap with you, (not that I know of any) but residency would be tough in the U.S. right now...
It's a pretty far out feeling being on this train with such different people. I Ike it.
Thank you so much for reading it fully @icmultitudes. My pleasure in writing a post is that some people not only vote but also read it, slowly building out a network of similar-minded or interested brothers and sisters on Steemit. Hopefully not choking but the last place in the world i want to go is the U.S. :-)
Love
I completely understand your feelings about this country. I don't really want to be here now either!
This is a very powerful post sharing a consciously empowered life adventure!
I resonate with much of it and share many similarities. I never wanted children for the same reasons as you. Though once I changed my mind we have been had children on the way ever since haha
I also have two children with dual passports born in different countries and have done lots of traveling.
Never used a doctor, midwife or anything. Living the super self reliant and free life. We are together as a family every day and love it.
A consciously family in love is the greatest thing I have found as a human so far.
Thanks for sharing.
Blessings~*~
Thanks @quinneaker, i have been following your posts for a while now and it looks like our lifestyles have indeed a lot in common. Family, love, sustainability as ingredients to a fullfilling live, happy to meet another beautiful soul, big hug
Yes it is quite rare this day in age yet there are some of us all over the world. Every where I go including here on Steemit there are some of us.
I honestly do with there were more but I let go of attachment a while back and rather than try and change everyone or judge I simply live my life according to my ideals so as living my be continually more fulfilling and alive than ever.
Hope to get to know you better, seems like you have a lot of valuable stories/perspective to share.
∞§∞Blessings∞§∞
Great family you have there. I'm all for homeschooling, but I think you did the right thing sending them to a school they love. I'd consider such a thing, if I had such an option! But you cannot find such a school in the urban jungle..
Glad to hear that @ladyrebecca, thanks. I have noticed your never-to-forget name before and had a look at your blog. Another beautiful soul, happy to connect!
meep
SUCH a story you have.. and many more on top! AMazing how you live and how you re-discover!
I really hope u find what you are looking for.. and when you do.. be sure to let me know!!! ;-)
Thank you @abigail-dantes. You took the 1 phrase out that came from my partner, she will be happy to hear that :-) Don't have any psychology in my feed yet, your posts look excellent, will follow, happy to connect, big hug.
I love reading about free spirited parents. I have wanted to take that step for so long, but am only moderately off-grid at the moment. My kids and I have quite a bit of unlearning to do =P
You are teaching your children something much more valuable than they could have experienced in the 'traditional' setting. I applaud you and your partner. (and) thank you for deciding to have children.. if there's going to be more people, let's aim for the conscientious ones who could actually save us in the end.
Hey @jenmariewrites, nice to meet you. Finally somebody who mentions my partner in the applauding, she is the true heart in the proces and the reason for the decision of going for it. Thanks for the nice comment.
Another amazing story. Your live is such an adventure, I'm surprised that in Belgium there's a “learning obligation”, not a “schooling obligation”. I wonder how long that will last if it hasn't changed already. Good luck with your adventure and thank you.
Ha, you are right, that was at least 10 years ago, will check it :-)
Verified, it is still like that, Belgium has a "learning obligation", no "school obligation"
That's good to know when you're moving to Europe. You don't want social services coming after you. I talked to quite a lot of people in the UK who had their children stolen by the state. It's horrible.
Amazing story and amazing experience.
I feel like I am reading a beautiful story that I was dreaming to live for a long time.
I really love and believe in what you said
Another thing I find amazing is how generous the universe is in answering our smallest requests with so much readiness and love. Yet we mainly refrain from asking out of fear (either fear of not being worthy or not being answered which tells us we are not worthy)
Loving and depending on the Universe is something new to me that I learned lately and I am happy to have found it. Unlike my past that was difficult (which I believe was meant to teach me many things for a better me), I am planning to have, and actually having, a full and beautiful life now and future.
Many thanks for sharing your beautiful experience. I am even more excited now to have mine :D
Love and peace :)
Thank you for this beautiful comment @theleapingkoala. Let me put in the universe that everything you put in the universe will be answered :-)
Many thanks @bubke for your sweet intentions and support. Now I feel that I am going to get even better than what I asked for :D
Bless you and your family :D
Another great story @bubke . Thanks for sharing. It's always inspiring to hear of a life lived to the full. Sounds like you realised that life itself is the greatest gift and you really make the best of it.
Great post really inspiring stuff. As we grow as a Steemit community we can attempt to chip away at the socio-economic political paradigms.
Count on me @stickchumpion :-) Good times to come for sure, i am glad i will be around for what's coming thanks to blockchain.
What a great family story. And how amazing that you can give your children this time and attention. I don't know any spots in South of Europe but I'm sure you will find your next paradise
So much faith sin life peaks from this story, wonderful to read.
I am Cornholio! You will co-operate with my bunghole!
Sorry, I'm not a nerd, I don't get these kind of jokes.
Español? Es bunghole! Habla, blah habla, habla habla, habla bunghole...
Beautiful. How it should be done :)
@azziz
我会支持你，上帝保佑你，我学中文，所以如果我犯了一些错误，那么我道歉并保持
非常感谢你
I will support you, God bless you, I learn chinese, so if I made some mistakes, then I apologize and keep it
thank you very much
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STOPIt seems I will never run out of fascinating people to run into on steemit. I feel similarly to you about having children. Hoping for the opportunity, slowly getting closer to it, but not there yet.
It's really amazing that you are able to continue living free and also giving that gift to a new human.
I'll be following you, upvoted your latest post since this post was too old.
Nice to meet you, will follow you too...xxx
thank you @bubke