The Stokes Family Creed

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The Stokes Family Creed

We are not perfect, but we do improve through what we value.

  • We tell the truth, even when it’s inconvenient or stirs up fear within us.

  • We choose love and abundance over fear and scarcity.

  • We value personal responsibility and achievement as virtues we celebrate and work towards.

  • As an ideal we work towards, we value every thought and interaction as an opportunity to become a little more like the best version of ourselves.

  • We prioritize improving our relationships and resolving conflict.

  • We value the search for truthful understanding about our true nature and the nature of reality and how that expresses itself through our faith, personal worldview, theory of everything, etc., and we respect our different views, even if we don’t fully agree with each other.

  • We value each other’s spirituality and spiritual journeys and support each other as best we can, however that looks for each of us such as meditation, prayer, fasting, worship, plant medicine journeys, retreats, congregational fellowship, or scriptural study.

  • We value sustainability, health, wellbeing, harmony, and growth in key aspects of life including intellectual, spiritual, psychological, physical, and financial.

  • We work towards discussing our feelings with humility and vulnerability, seeking reconciliation and understanding while trying not to take on a victim mentality or sense of entitlement.

  • We work for what we want and understand we are owed nothing but the value we create for others through mutual, voluntary agreement.

  • We try to view any circumstance, good or bad, as an opportunity to improve ourselves.

  • We work to be aware of and informed by our unconscious, negative reactions to circumstances and work through any stories, avoidances, insecurities, or fears they highlight.

  • We chart our own path through life and do not accept common norms that don’t resonate with our understanding of truth and value which we’ve built through our own study of facts, data, logic, experience, and gnosis (examples include views on vaccine safety, the global fiat monetary system, growing lawns vs. food, GMOs and pharmaceuticals, models of education, sexual promiscuity before marriage, dogmatism, etc).

  • We celebrate life with gratitude and thanksgiving and try to see everything as a gift while taking nothing for granted.

  • We value our family, friends, and community and are intentional about spending quality time with them.

  • We are conscious of the quality of ingredients we consume as food and thus cook the majority of our meals at home, from scratch, and continue to learn about the latest, unbiased views on optimal healthy eating.

  • We value the importance of physical intimacy from erotic to platonic which shows up as consistent, prioritized hang out time as a married couple and regular sharing of hugs as a family.

  • We enjoy helping others without enabling avoidance within them as we try to honor the uniqueness of each individual journey.

  • We enjoy being useful to others and sharing our successes together.

  • We value being physically active through sports and exercise in order to challenge ourselves to improve, connect with others, and stay healthy.

  • We value art and creative expression as it manifests in each of us in our own unique ways.

  • We work to stay open to correction and improvement while not giving in to defensiveness and avoidance.

  • We strive to not interrupt each other and work to participate in active listening, choosing the best interpretation of intentions we hear.

  • We really don’t like waste and work to be efficient with our use of resources.

  • We value financial wisdom including budgeting, saving, investing, and giving.

  • We value quality sleep and reasonable use of technology and screens in healthy balance with an active life.

  • We try to learn from our mistakes and work to set up new stories, beliefs, actions, habits, and tools to change our behavior over time to be in greater alignment with our best self.

  • We enjoy treats, libations, and special experiences in moderation as part of the beautiful flavor of life.

  • In regards to injuries, we prioritize proper steps to restore health and optimal functioning.

  • While we value discipline as an important tool for achieving our goals, we try to approach life with an easy going attitude that is flexible and adaptable regarding ever-changing circumstances.

  • Though we work regularly to keep our living space clean and hospitable, we don’t live in a museum but instead prioritize convenience and enjoying our space as a comfort, not a burden.

  • We freely and regularly express our love and appreciation for each other through various love languages.

  • We use the Fruit of the Spirit (love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control) as a guide to right action we want to encourage, support, and maximize in our lives.

  • We try to speak to each other with kindness but also with conviction and clarity, not avoidance or passive aggression, and we try to incorporate non-violent communication to own our own experience and communicate our own needs, inviting others to meet them instead of casting judgment or blame.

  • We work to define success before we spend our lives chasing after it, and we regularly refine our definition of success through self-inquiry questions like “Who am I?”, “What do I want?”, “How can I serve those around me?”

Drafted and reviewed November, 2024, by Luke, Corinne, Devon, Aria, and Monet.

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We never had anything that formal, but the kids turned out okay anyway. There's a lot of selfishness and intolerance these days that the world could do without. Live well and do good.