Yeah, my life has been a bit tough, but I have learned and seen so much. I wouldn't change a thing, except the mindset of our society.
I love your retreat idea and Earthships are wonderful structures. I have been to the Earthship Biotecture Museum in Taos, NM and am a huge proponent for natural building and off grid living. I currently live 80% off grid and have had the pleasure of building with Cob.
Your aspirations are commendable and I hope you obtain your vision and are able to build your retreat.