Hey hey, Mister. I have a very special something for you!
Said Blathers, a java developer as he approached my desk.
I looked up, painting a pleasant smile on my face to mask the curdling hatred I have of software developers, Java ones in particular, who in my opinion all smell a bit feety.
Oh yes, what would that be then?
I said as if this was the kind of world in which men like he and I exchanged gifts all the time.
Blathers had his hands behind his back and was grinning like a loon. I hoped he didn't have a gun.
Well, BoomDawg. I know you like beer, so, you were forefront in my mind when I was brewing my latest batch. Tada!
He pulled his hands out from behind his back, in them was a dark brown bottle. Something within it rolled about like a snake.
I studied the bottle and then him somewhat suspiciously. We had never really gotten on well. In fact I could remember about four occasions lately where we had had some spectacular shouty shouty disagreements in meetings.
What is it?
I said. Narrowing my eyes in an attempt to force the contents of the bottle to leap out and reveal themselves.
It's beer of course!
Blathers exclaimed.
He held the bottle out to me.
Reluctantly I took it from him. It felt oily. I hoped it hadn't been wrapped in his underpants or anything more dubious.
He grinned whilst I held it up to the light.
From what I could see through the glass it certainly looked like it could be beer. I have learned through bitter experience though to never trust my eyes. They have betrayed me on more than one occasion.
Did you... Make this?
I ventured.
The bottle was warming in my hands and I swear I could smell a certain mustiness emanating from it.
I did!! I made it! Home brew, it tastes excellent if I do say so myself. I heard that you review beers for a website?
I made a cat chewing a shoe face.
Yes, I do do... reviews...
Well, if you could give me your honest opinion I would love to hear it!
He smiled treacherously at me like a snake in a bag.
I smiled back. It was a false smile. I knew what this was. I had seen enough of the Game of Thrones to recognise this game. It was quite clearly and blatantly poison.
He was obviously intending to remove me and claim my seat or my shoes or something. Perhaps he wanted to sleep with my wife?
The villain.
Well, he would have no luck with me. I could see right through him.
I would be glad to taste it and let you know what I thought!
I exclaimed as if we were hand in hand in the queue to see Taylor Swift in concert.
Excellent!
He said, no doubt already wondering if the shirts in my wardrobe would fit me.
He toddled off. Very carefully, I placed the bottle of poison beer in my bag.
Later at home I opened it.
A dank smell of corruption and sweetness wafted forth. I waved it in the direction of one of my cats. It ran away. I nodded grimly.
Aye, 'Game of Thrones' me would you?
I scoffed to myself as I poured it down the sink.
The next day at work, Blathers approached. He looked both disappointed and nervous to see me.
How was it, did you like it?
It was magnificent. I drank it all down and then took the good lady to bed!
I announced triumphantly.
Oh. Right, it was that good then? As long as it didn't send you to the toilet...
He looked both hopeful and unsure. As if he knew that I knew that he knew I knew he was a villain.
No toilet, just sweet sweet joy. Mmm, yummy. Thank you.
Blathers paced away, shoulders slumped in defeat.
I put my feet up on the desk.
This King ain't for moving.
What about you? Do you work in a place where they conspire to poison you via the medium of free gifts and kindness? Or was I just being a bit melodramatic!
Tell us your best tales in the comments. I will be there to listen!
Authored by @meesterboom
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Thank you!
Very well told that bad game, @meesterboom; heavy game, I would say, typical of people who weave rarefied, toxic relationships with their peers (co-workers or classmates, especially). I think you solved this situation of deception and mockery well, appealing to the wisdom and intelligence of the character who narrates, who turns to previous knowledge establishing the analogy with "Game of Thrones".
It's a kind of harassment (bullying) and very bad taste. I haven't experienced it in myself, but I have observed it in others. I have always rejected, condemned, that kind of "games", because they are one disrespect to the other.
Thank you for your story, as well as @adsactly for spreading it. Greetings.
lmao! @Meesterboom today you're sounding like they all want to kill you in your work place. Well the world is evil these days and such one has to be extremely careful in their dealings with colleagues you have had a fight or exchanged words with at the office, they may not mean well. I would just say you are being careful regardless of whether it was poisoned or not.
Well i have also had such experience but not at work place at me apartment and it was neighbor who we don't move on well with but will always bring food for me to eat and once i collect i pour them imside the toilet and then return the plates neat and with a smile on my face, ah madam your food taste delicious just to turn her mind away.
That's the best tactic to adopt, stay safe!! :0)
This is another funny story of @meesterboom, who with his particular style brings us a smile. From the first lines I knew it was you. Blathers wanted to make a joke, but the intelligence and suspicion of our protagonist discovered it, it is not so easy to joke with someone who makes jokes and knows them all hahaha. Anyway, if the fears he had were valid, he came out safe and sound, he continued in his job and Blathers was disappointed. Grateful for this reading and @adsactly for sharing it.
And I thank you for reading! They always say, you can't joke a Joker!
Hahahaha. Man warned, it's worth two! In my case I'm a teacher and it's the students who are always trying to get me out of the game or to be my allies! Once a student brought a piece of cake and asked me to try it in my office. I told her I didn't eat candy before lunch. I saw his disappointed face! When I got home I gave the cake to the neighbor. The neighbor grabbed the cake with a surprised face. Then I found out that she gave it to the gardener. I don't know if the gardener gave it to someone else and this one ate it or if the cake is still spinning from hand to hand in the neighborhood. I wouldn't be surprised if I suddenly returned to my hands as a Christmas present! hahahahaha. It's always a pleasure to read to you, @meesterboom
Cheers! It sounds life you are well versed in the game of survival!!
This post has received a 20.00% upvote from @jmiller05!
Jmiller05 for president!
great the game my friend,i like it game,@adsactly
Play the game, be the game!
its amazing games and very interesting
The best games are amazing games and interesting ;0)
I love playing games a lot especially football games