Filipino Jokes Translated for Western Tastes Part 63 (My Entry for Comedy Open Mic - Round 22)

in #funny6 years ago

Giphy

Good day, my fellow Steemers and Whalesharers! This is the 63rd part of my series post about local Filipino jokes which I have translated for people of the English language. Please read and pick the ones you like best from this post series. Tell me in the comments section on why you liked it.

I think nobody in Steemit and Whaleshares has done this kind of post series before. So I took it upon myself to do it even if you think it might not be popular or profitable. I just wanted to be the first to do this kind of thing. It would be up to you to decide, my fellow readers, if I was successful or not.

There are still a lot more Filipino local jokes that we need to be translating. These jokes are the products of the Filipinos' creativity, ingenuity, and love of social drinking.

Read and enjoy!



The mosquito

James was shocked to see John letting a mosquito land on his wrist.

JAMES: Why are you letting that damn mosquito suck out your blood?!?
JOHN: Oh, I am going to make it full and satisfied so I could chase it away long enough to make it get appendicitis!


Late reason

TEACHER: Why are you late?
JOHN: A neighbor lost his 500 Pesos bill on the street...
TEACHER: You helped him look for it?
JOHN: No, I stepped on it and waited for him to go away looking for it!


Rolex watch

Giphy

PETER: Wow, your new Rolex watch is beautiful!
JIM: Oh, this? I won it in a race at a beach resort.
PETER: How many of you participated in that race?
JIM: There were only three of us. The owner of the watch, the security guard and me!


The steak

Meanwhile at a fancy restaurant.

CUSTOMER: Waiter! This steak is so dry and hard to chew!
WAITER: Really, sir? Here, I'll try it. (Eats a piece of the steak) Sir, but it is soft, chewy and juicy!
CUSTOMER: Of course! I have been chewing that meat for 3 minutes!


The medication

Giphy

NURSE: Sir, wake up! It is time for you to take your medicine!
PATIENT:(Waking up slowly) Oh, nurse...what kind of medicine is it?
NURSE: Sleeping pills!



Translated from Source: My old classmates. XUHS Class of 1992


Follow me as @darthnava: "So many times, it happens too fast...You trade your passion for glory.."

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Hi sir,, love those jokes!! Especially the steak and the late joke.. really fun. Thanks for the share and God bless

Thank you for enjoying my post! God Bless you.

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Great post dear @darthnava