For many, Father's Day is one of the least significant "holidays" of the year. It pales in comparison to Mother's Day (and I am totally fine with that).
When I sat down, I was going to write a funny piece busting on how little fan-fare there is for Father's Day compared to its counterpart... but then I would be perpetuating the "problem". (It's really not that serious. We can all relax).
I might still attempt to write a funny post... but this is not that post.
I am lucky enough to have a father figure in my life worthy of praising. Thirty years ago, I would have never imagined I'd be typing that about this particular man. Fortunately, 46 year olds are much wiser than 16 year olds (and hopefully say fewer stupid things to police officers).
So this one is for you George!
When I was three years old, my mother and father got divorced. I spent the next six years visiting my father every Wednesday afternoon... with a few weekends sprinkled in here or there. When I was nine, he died.
Happy Father's Day everyone! Thanks for reading!
Kidding.
This is not a sad story. When I was seven my mother married a man named George.
George looked a lot like Neil Sedaka when he met my mom. I know none of you young people know who he is. Google him.
George happens to be the quietest person I have ever met in my life. He is basically silent. Recently I told my daughter that Grandpa had said that he wanted to hear her and her brother play their musical instruments. She looked at me like I had just grown a second head. She cocked her single head and said, "That's impossible. Grandpa never talks." She wasn't kidding... and she was right.
To further illustrate this point, my daughter likes to do impersonations of people in the family. When I ask her to imitate my Mom, her eyes get wide, she changes her voice to sound very excited and slightly more mature and says, "Oh my lovely grandchildren. Just look at them. Everything they do is just so wonderful. Here have a toy!"
When I ask her to imitate George, she gets a blank look on her face and stares ahead.
Both are spot on impersonations.
I met George when I was 6. I lived with him from the time I was 7 until I turned 21 (with some time away at colleges sprinkled in there). During those nearly 14 years, I probably had five conversations with George ... and that is on the high end. We didn't go to baseball games. We didn't play catch. We didn't go to the movies or dinner or watch TV together. It is important to note that for much of that time, George worked the night shift as a security guard. That made it even more difficult to connect.
So how are you doing George? Nice talk. Try again in 15 years?
On top of that, George is not good with kids. He simply doesn't know what to say to them. He is so naturally quiet and introverted that he struggles with adults. So trying to figure out how to communicate with kids was torture for him.
And yet, when I was 7 and my sister was 10, this man who was so uncomfortable around kids, chose to add two of them to his life.
Why? He loved my mom... and my sister and I. I wrote that George had trouble interacting with us as kids. He never had trouble loving us as kids. He just had his own way of showing it.
George showed love by pulling my mom and her two kids out of poverty and giving them a chance at a happy life. He welcomed me into a house. Not a cockroach filled, rat infested apartment... a real house like I had seen on the Brady Bunch.
He made sure we were able to go to the doctor and the dentist. And I mean a real dentist. Not the 75 year old guy who treated us for free... while his hands shook the entire time.
We ate healthy food every evening and slept in our own warm bedrooms every night. Every year we got brand new school clothes and shoes. We did not need my aunts' and uncles' hand-me-downs anymore. When we were sick we had the proper medicine. When it came time for high school, he paid to ensure that we didn't get stuck at a failing public school. He took us to Six Flags and Disney World.
He gave us a childhood.
I will. Thanks George!
I did not know it at the time, but his providing us with these things came at great sacrifice. You see, George was working extra shifts to give all of this to two kids he met when they were 6 and 9 years old.
George was a provider. He provided us with everything we needed to meet our physical and educational needs. He provided my mom with the freedom and the time to attempt to meet our emotional needs.
Then he provided me with my twin "little brothers". Although they are 38 now, they will always be my "little brothers". They are my best friends in the world. Thanks for providing them for me George (oh and Mom)!
As I have become older, George and I have had more and more conversations. He isn't great with kids... luckily I didn't stay a kid forever.
Things really changed when I foolishly bought a fixer-upper house when I was 30. George happens to know how to fix or build everything in a house. I truly believe he could build a house from scratch all by himself.
On the other hand, I know nothing. I can swing a hammer (if you point me at the right nail). But that is about it. For one entire summer, George and I worked side by side remodeling every room of that house. As we worked, we talked and joked. I had discovered George had a sense of humor.
George's sense of humor is slightly better than this.
I hated working on the house. In fact, I have decided that if there is indeed a Hell and I end up there, my job will be to remodel Hell. Then every day the devil will burn down my work so I have to do it again... for all eternity. (But that is a different story for a post all its own).
I despised the work, but I loved spending time with my step father.
I finally had the amazing father-son moment I had always wanted.
After that shared common experience, we talk a lot more now. We even joke.
Better late than never.
But now I need to go. My kids bought me the Lego Batman Movie for Father's Day.
Wait. Maybe George is good with kids... considering I am obviously still a child.
Nothing memorable to me about a father, because he is too busy. I will take this to be a lesson, for my child will pay more attention to it.
That is the best thing you can do. Take the situation and learn what not to do.
Don't over compensate though, just posted on the effect that is having. Be there without over bearing.
Good point.
Working on the engine of a 65 mustang as a kid
Playing in the rain and washing our hair in beer
Listening to Aretha Franklin, Chuck Berry and Ray Stevens.
Listening to him play guitar
Listening to his words of advice on life
But most impressive was his advice to all three of us girls on auto repair, you need to know how to do this so you don't have to rely on a man to do it.
He is a great guy, raised in a broken household, with the work ethic of a horse. Love you Dad!
That is awesome! Sounds like a great guy.
Father of my first love, I'm looking for a figure that affectionately seems. He always protects me, never gives freedom like the other child, and now I just feel it is useful for my good life. Thanks for my dad
That is very nice.
I did not have a great childhood in some respects, or good family times most of the time, TBH.
I actually touched on that today when I wrote this post today and named you as a good dad type.
Came to find you to let you know about this and here is your post already on the same topic LOL.
I would normally drop this link on an older post of yours where the action has died down as you know but this is topical and maybe someone else or a even a single mom or single parent needs to see this today.
Have a great week my friend.
https://steemit.com/life/@barrydutton/happy-father-s-day-everyone-and-to-the-single-parents-moms-too-pulling-double-duty-duly-noted-and-appreciated-some-shout-outs
Thanks man!
NP my friend, I hope you have a nice week.
I think of you lots when I am able to get out of the house and I see Star Wars stuff
lol
VERY NICE POST..... ^^^UPVOTE^^
I guess one of my favourite memories was when I did a bit of travelling with my dad to Poland. It was just him and me and it was a good time!
That sounds like a great experience!
I love fathers day so much that i cant wait to be one myself. I mean the joy of being a mentor to someone you helped create i believe is overwhelming.
I salute all RESPONSIBLE fathers out there who are out there struggling to do something worthwhile not just for themselves but for their families as well. All i can say is keep on grinding and your hustle will pay off soon
Great sentiments! I hope you are lucky enough to experience it one day.
My dad dropping me off at college, tearing up a bit and shaking my hand. He's a great man.
That is simple yet beautiful.
First comment and I'm already teary eyed.
That's kind of beautiful actually @nepd.
My dad loves playing guitar and entertaining crowds, especially at cookouts or large gatherings.
It never fails, when someone new is in the crowd -- a friend, girlfriend, or new acquaintance, he finds a way to play "My Ding-A-Ling" and start a singalong.
I used to be super embarrassed when he did this, but over the years it has grown on me!
That is awesome! Your dad's "thing' is to play My Ding-A-Ling! That is amazing. I am jealous. I want my kids to have to say something like that!
I never met my dad. Every upvote $ will go towards the child support my mother never received :)
I'm sorry to hear that. I hope you have some supportive people in your life now.
It all worked out in the end. I'm now I'm married with 2 beautiful children of my own! lucky for them they get to see me daily :) whether they feel the same or not is another story lol.
Thanks for all the support. Some may say.. hey it's only $0.25 well it's $0.25 more than he gave us :)
Lost my dad 6 months ago to cancer. Happy Father's Day to all the dads, and best of thoughts to all the sons and daughters to have lost a father. ❤️
I am sorry for your loss. I hope your good memories of your father give you strength.
Thank you. Much appreciated.
Great read. I guess my favourite moment with him was him just sitting down in the car with him, asking me how is everything, a very general question. But at least I knew someone cared at the very least when life feels so lonely. It always ends up with him stuffing me some money and saying, you got to eat more.
Its been 7 years, since he left us for the lord, but to me it feels like yesterday.
I have been working my very hard at my craft, hoping to provide more for my family as I had promised on his last breath.
Been a trader since about 8years now, he's the one that taught me my craft at the beginning of my journey, and I have never looked back since.
Thanks for the read, triggered some memories, good memories.
It makes me so happy that you are thinking about happy memories of your father. I am sorry for your loss. I hope those happy memories bring you strength.
The first time I got really drunk, at 15, I drank a handle of Bacardi with 3 other friends. Ended up in the back of a cop car, in a hospital, and eventually back at my mom's house, where we'd began this stupid experience. I remember the next day still being drunk and having the spins in my bed. My dad came to visit me. He wasn't angry, more worried about my health. That's a time when I was reminded he really cared about me. (I had always thought he was really uptight my whole life).
Sometimes it takes a major event like that to get you to notice who really cares. Kids make mistakes. Parents need to help their kids learn from them.
Great story!
Had a similar experience with Tequila. Can't drink it to this day.
I can't either but for a different reason: I think I may be allergic to agave... My lungs can't handle it and I begin wheezing like crazy!
Happy Father´s Day!!
Lol!
My father is the person who really supports me in every positive thing that I do and he always advise me if I make a mistake, happy father's day...
That's great! Happy Father's Day!
Happy Father's Day to all fathers
yes Happy Father's Day!!!
My dad would emphasize in education so much in our childhood... I can't really recall any fun memorable time that I would say he was funny or silly or made us laugh and do crazy amazing things...but he tried. Happy Father's Day to you all.
sounds like he face good advice about education.
spending father's day taking care of the children. That's a real father's day.
Very true.
Great piece, bro. Thanks for sharing. What a life-changer George was for you mom and her two children. I hope they add to each others' happiness.
My dad was a provider, but not much in the way of relationships. He had his friends, but neglected his family. Most of our time together when I was young seemed to involve some sort of discipline. We did have a few moments, but they were few and far between.
When we provided grandkids, he started coming around. And his best friend was an awesome dad, so he would be challenged and started realizing what he'd missed as a dad. This resulted in him calling me just to talk.
This built for a couple of years. I was a bit standoffish and perhaps bitter, though I started to come around. But I remember distinctly when my attitude abruptly changed... a lot of things changed.
He called me on a Thursday and we chatted for quite awhile. When we had to get off the phone, I remember that I distinctly felt regret that the conversation was over. I was enjoying talking to dad. It struck me at that moment, right there.
As it turned out, that was an incredible gift from God. I never spoke to dad again. He didn't make it through Friday. Almost 23 years later I can still feel both the joy of that phone call and the incredible loss that followed.
Wow. I have chills. No exaggeration. "Better late than never" for sure. I am so happy that your dad was able to build a relationship with you before it was too late.
You know me. I am hardly ever at a loss for words.... but this is too powerful. I need to quietly sit in awe for a minute.
I'll probably share the story a year from now, but maybe the following fall on the anniversary of his death. I'll be the same age he was when he died, so it really provokes a lot of thought.
Wow. It sure does. I remember when I hit 33 (That is when my dad died). I couldn't get over thinking how young 33 was. My life had barely started.
I look forward to reading your story when the time is right.
Luckily I still get to see my father almost daily. Family is very important to me and being there for each other. Happy fathers day to all the dads out there!
That is great! I'm glad you have that. You are very lucky.
My favourite memory is probably us going on a hike together.
It was great
Happy Fathers Day!
That's cool that you share an interest like that.
However old I get, as long as I have my father around, I always feel protected. Good write-up !
Well that is beautiful and powerful!
Nice post.
I never knew my dad, but I dreamed of the day all my life.
He was brave, compassionate and taught me sports and was my best friend.
This was a fantastic story. I am glad you have such a great role model in your life that you can still look up to and appreciate.
I would say my dad "moment" came when I was first heading to university and I was sitting in the back of my parents' car. We came to the city limits of my new home and I said, "ok, I'm ready to go home now." My dad, without missing a beat, shifted in his seat, turned to me and said "This is your home now."
I was upset and terrified.
We got to my residence, set up my room and made sure I had everything I needed to get through the year. When it came time for my parents to leave, mom and I were hugging and crying when my dad came up to me. He pulled me into a big hug and told me how proud he was that I was facing my fears and going to school so far away from home. He had tears in hia eyes. That is when I realised this was as hard for him as it was for me.
My dad has been my champion all through my life and i am so fortunate to have him.
That's beautiful!
Thanks. My dad is a pretty awesome guy. I am a bit spoiled in that respect.
Just make sure you tell him!
I always do.
Step fathers can be great fathers; I had one too. We never used the word "step" in our family because we cared about each other.
Very true!
Aw, this is a beautiful tribute. It's cool to grow up as see your parents as real people, and appreciate them for who they are. My dad raised us as a single parent for the majority of my childhood; as a single parent myself I can appreciate the challenges he faced. My best memories are just hanging out together watching goofy sitcoms. We still do that together. Good times.
That is awesome! I am so happy you have that relationship with your dad!
That was a beautiful story so well written and I was captivated.. Happy father's day to you Hans and happy father's day to George .. Yes always better late than never 🕊
Thanks! Happy Father's Day tool of the fathers in your life!
Thank you! My father and mother had twenty kind and we were poor but us children didn't know it. My dad paid attn to all his children and always made sure we had fun. I was blessed to have parents like mine. My adulthood though that's another story lol happy father's day again enjoy your whole day I hope you will get very spoiled today!🌹🍻
First of all, this post NEEDS to be shared/resteemed, because fathers are being treated as an anathema in our society, especially how they are portrayed in the entertainment industry.
My dad was likewise a provider. He was a heavy-equipment mechanic. Most mechanics have half their body in an engine all day. My dad (and I know this because I worked one summer at the steel mill where he worked) would often crawl up into the belly of a diesel beast, with many thousands of dollars at stake hinging on him fixing the problem.
He used to come home clean (showered at work) and we three kids, I and my two sisters would yell "Daddy's home!" and we would attack him in a wrestling match. I remember I would almost panic being at the bottom of the pile sometimes, but that at the same time feeling very safe. Yes, dads are the backbone of society, and we MUST honor them!
What a great memory! And just think how physically exhausted he probably was from work. yet he mustered up the strength and energy to play with his kids.
That is awesome!!!
Exactly! I am going out to eat with my mom & dad soon, which I try to do every weekend, but I plan on doing some Father's Day post later today. Thanks for the post!
Please drop a link here so I and others can read it.
going to the festival in the summer was always a good memory :)
great post
Very cool. Especially since it sounds like that was an annual thing. Hope you have some cool pictures that show the changes from year to year.
He always pat me on my shoulder and say I'm here don't worry....just those words from his mouth are enough for me to stay motivated
Wow. Again. Simple and beautiful. Thank you for sharing that.
welcome
I'm in the passenger seat of my '87 Camaro, my dad is driving. He catches a flashback and tries to burnout on a residential street. I give him "the dad" look and he starts laughing.
LOL. Sounds like a fun guy!
Haven't got any, my father was and is a dick havent spoke to him for nearly 20 years. Sounds like you had a good role model to look up to :)
I hope there is someone else that fills that role for you... even if just a little.
Unfortunately not, never had a father figure
My father done his best... now it's up to me to do the rest. Thanks for sharing.
Cool motto!
Thank you :)
I only saw mine 3-4 times and not for very long, but he gave me a set of encyclopedia with which I taught myself to read.
I'm sorry you didn't see him more but it is really cool that you learned to read using encyclopedias. We had a set in the 1970s. I don't even think my kids know what they are.
In the late 40's... They were the internet!
I hate that we are being the slaves of the modern world... chasing things we don't want too, just because of our padron (money) says so. I am not able to see my parents in months and every time i go, that smile in their face is incomparable to anything and yet everytime, i feel so sad that i cannot give them more often that smile just because i want to chase my material dreams :(.
Thank you for this amazing post :)
But no one can take that smile away!
True at least that :(
My dad was a great man. Being a Police Officer he can still discipline us to be a good person. Thanks Dad.
That is awesome. I like how you added the "thanks".
Wow thanks for the appreciation. :)
One of my favorite memories is when I was I child almost every Sunday morning I would drive with my dad to an Italian bakery in Portland, Maine, abut 30 minutes away from where we lived to buy fresh-baked Italian bread to bring home. Our drives were quiet and peaceful. We enjoyed each other's company. This memory has always stayed with me.
That is fantastic! Thank you for sharing that. It made me smile.
My favourite memory of my dad is when I had basketball camp in the states. Instead of flying me there we took a road trip, he drive a whole 20hrs just to watch me play basketball.
That is so cool!
He gave us a childhood.
That was so touching and shows what kind of a person he is.
My dad was my everything. He passed on leaving a huge void in my life.
My dad traveled a lot for his work and at every airport, he would buy me a book, and the books were related to life, success and successful entrepreneurs.
He then wrote me a small note while he waited to board the flight. The notes are mostly meant as motivation. I have all those books with the notes still in them.
Your post brought back so many memories of my dad. Thank you!
I am so happy you have those notes. That is so cool. I am sorry for your loss but happy you have those memories.
When he arranged to have a baby tiger waiting for me so I could hug him!
Really?! That's amazing!
Yes! My dad is truly the worlds most interesting man haha I wrote about him on my last post, take a peek!
https://steemit.com/photography/@artedellavita/today-we-celebrate
Cool. I will.
Thank you, enjoy your Sunday!
My favorite memory was my dad teaching me how to shoot the basketball when I was young. I had dreams of becoming an NBA star after he taught me
That's cool. I guess you didn't make the NBA but you always have those memories.
Exactly, I played in high school but didn't make it any farther
When he used to carry me on his shoulders and make me feel like I had to worries while he walked barefoot on the steaming hot floor but would work hard to put shoes on my feet . Love you dad
Wow very powerful image!
My Dad was a quiet man and, within the home, I felt my Mom called the shots as to discipline. When Mom and I would "get into it" Dad was my counsel as to the resolution. An example of this counsel was when I got my engagement ring while still in college and wanted to get married before finishing school. Mom was not for that plan. After long discussions my Dad said, "when dealing with your Mother just respect her opinion and be sure you are doing as near right as you can understand and then do what you think is best". That was my most memorable advice from him and it still applies dealing with others on many varying subjects. They are both gone now but their sweet memories go with me.
I am sorry for your loss. It I'm happy you have those memories and received some excellent advice,
Hum, I wonder what my son's best memory of me thus far?
You should ask him!
Just for being my best friend <3
Sounds good.
Happy Father's Day - we had ours some weeks ago - i lost my dad last year and favourite memories are still in a shadow a bit - some of the work we did together are worth to mention. he was not a Sports guy so no memory hear - I certainly miss him a lot.
Sorry for your loss. I hope the fond memories of him give you strength,
Not be able to explain in words..
I understand.
Going out on weekends with dad to the gardens and playing are my favourite memories of childhood :)
That sounds very nice.
My father is a very good friend of mine.. he has supported me even when I was thinking that he will never support me again. And he was doing it again and again... I want to make him feel proud of me... I am very close to it.. happy Father's Day to fathers around the world!!!
That is cool. I am sure you make your father proud!