Three Dollars

in #funny4 years ago

I spent $3. I forget on what, but I know I left with a smile on my face and a hole large enough for a gofer. That's gofer, not a golfer or a Topher (which is totally a made up name... hehehehe Topher the gofer).

It was a long 3 hours, now you might be thinking $3 for 3 hours is great deal (or you might be not thinking anything seeing as your name is Topher and I just blew your mind about it being a made up name and now all you think about is how your parents lied to you for 15 years about Santa Claus), but you see it entirely depends on what you paid for an if you actually like it. I'll give you an example

  • I spent $3 on a used condom... It took me 3 hours to get it on because it was slippery, but boy was it fun.
  • I spend $3 on a bucket of horse pheromones, I then spent 3 hours running away from a stallion after accidentally spilling it on myself.

See... It can easily be that I spent $3 and arguably over paid, but still had a smile on my face. Now welcome back to all the Tophers, if you're just joining us, please just read forward and ignore the imagery of a grown man buying a used condom off facebook marketplace in a shady backroom deal that went south and resulted in the hospitalization of 3 cats, 2 dogs and a goat.

It wasn't anything that exciting though, I actually bought a cappuccino and forgot to drink it for 2 hours so my co-workers slipped some kind of drug into my coffee which made me nauseously happy.

So now I'm suing them.

Alls well that ends well.

Sort:  

Idipussy is back

I see you're now old enough to grow a beard. congrats.

Thanks, it took long hours of editing.