Breaking news ! .. Pretend President Biden says 'There’s no federal solution'...

in #funny3 years ago

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Many people thought that the statement was referring to the ultra deadly disease that's sweeping across the country at the moment, leaving behind in it's wake , people just as healthy as they were, prior to catching it.
(scientific name COLe D, or ‘the cold’,)

That was not the case, however.

It seems his statement was actually referring to his upcoming break at his Delaware beach home.

“Have you seen the fucking state of the economy ?” He said, “This government ain’t doing shit, and did you know that they even have a woman as vice president ?....you can’t depend on that lot for anything... I’m off ! ”.

With that, he picked up a few of his favorite coloring books and set off on foot, to Delaware, muttering "If Washington can cross the river, I can cross , you know...the thing.."

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Pretend president sets off for Delaware...

The security services and his personal body guards were sent into an immediate panic .

He’d completely forgotten about his box of crayons!

The pretend president -without any crayons - automatically triggered off a def crayon1 situation - and so they quickly dispatched his helicopter to intercept the roving Pretend President.

23 U.S. civilians , who were still trapped in Afghanistan were killed unfortunately - due to the lack of gasoline for the helicopter that was scheduled to rescue them ( it had been diverted for use in the pretend presidents helicopter) , but the pretend president DID get all his crayons... so it all turned out for the best.

The president was startled with the sudden appearance of - to quote ‘ the big whirly thing in the sky’, but he soon regained his composure, if not his clean underwear, and promptly headed over to pick up his crayons from ‘the whirly thing ’.

The Pilot later told reporters that there was no need to hand over the crayons as they had no intention of letting him off the helicopter again until he was secured safely in Delaware, with lots of cushions.

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Rumors of him boarding the helicopter, and asking the pilot “are we there yet ?” are totally unfounded, (according to the Pilot ).*

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*The pilot has since announced his early retirement, stating "I've just won 6 million dollars on the lottery - and I didn't even buy a ticket !"

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Coming up!....

The story of a person who spent their entire life 'getting it wrong'.

(it's not the pretend president, it's someone else entirely)....

A comedy of tragic errors..... That's a comedy..... And a tragedy .....
(It really depends on where we are in the story - it kinda shifts from one to the other.....).
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Oh, and....

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.....If anyone knows how to stop me from finding this zombie so incredibly hot, please let me know...It's getting kinda disturbing...

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Well , i did a deep dive for you ,.. and yes , you might be barking up the wrong tree ,. hmm , oh' wait , that must be , .. humping the wrong leg ,. sorry , i was a bit confused there . The Zombie drummer girl is a visual part of a Swedish band . And i found some ,.. to me ,disturbing things about them . First this i saw ,..https://kent.nu/latar/elite/ , where they have all there text's written out . Linked one is about a song called Elite . You might wanna use translation on it .
The flag's and banners in the Zombie vid made me start to have doubt's , blue cross rising , while the Red crossed flag carriers leave the battlefield , unharmed .
Further more , those lyrics connect to hidden knowledge ,..

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They praise the christian monarchy's , and fuck it ,... they know , adding 1 to 56 won't fool me .

But he' don't let me spoil your fun . Then As Now Forever,... Fucking Anunaki inbreed offspring keeping their grasp on power , showing it of true that shit . Damn i almost fell for it . Fooled by their wicked tricks . I can imagine those "Elite" seeing @lucylin his post's and grin and smile on it .

Well might i have cured your mentioned field disturbance , i did it free of charge , always good to save a fellow human from the fires of hell . ;-)

Disclaimer :
I do not claim anything communicated true this post to be the truth ,.. it's just one of a million vision's i daily get to consume with my mind ,.. and for real , i do not give a fuck ,.. it's not where i am heading , so i truly don't give a fuck . Find your own bone(s) , while digging i say , :-)

I appreciate the effort- but it really didn't help any....

You made the schoolboy error - of trying to talk sense to the second brain - that's always doomed to fail - ask the dude who went looking for Helen at Troy...

I just think that zombie chick will rip it right off at the worst moment....it is not worth it today for never again, ever....perhaps that helps.

That kind of commons sense never helps in these matters...but thanks...

Primal kind of common sense....sorta !PIZZA

!LOL

How often should you tell chemistry jokes?
Periodically.

@lucylin, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @marshmellowman
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (4/6)

PIZZA!

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