A few weeks ago I wrote a post talking about several things I don’t understand about musicals. As you might know, I hate musicals, so writing that post was a lot of fun for me. The rant comes naturally, you know!
Today however, I am going to talk about a few things about action movies that make no sense at all. I know this is a recurring theme in movies in general, but action movies manage to take it up a notch, or a few notches for that matter!
You see, there is ‘breaking the laws of physics’ and then there is ‘completely obliterating them and coming up with your own’. If it was the former, I would take no issue at all, but action movies always try and go the latter route and that’s where I draw the line!
So, without further adieu, let me share with you all, a few things about these movies, that make me want to roll my eyes and ‘get to the chopper’ just so I could escape the movie theatre.
1. Cool Guys Don’t Look At Explosions
This has to be one of everyone’s favourite action movie cliches because who doesn’t love a big explosion in the background while the hero walks towards the camera in slow motion right?
The problem is that every other movie is doing it right now but that’s not even the part to fuss about. Do you know how dangerous it would be to do that in real life?
If you have ever been anywhere near to even a mid-sized fire, you would know that the amount of heat is just unbearable. So, walking just a few feet away from major explosions is a sure shot way to book a ride to the hospital if not the afterlife!
2. Bullets Don’t Touch The Hero
Somehow every hero in an action movie comes equipped with an ever lasting luck, or maybe it’s just a bullet diverting technology that they don’t show explicitly and believe viewers will just assume the same.
We have all seen a single hero take down dozens of highly armed bad guys as if it was just a walk in the park. The absolute eye roller is when the bad guys shoot a gazillion bullets at the good guy and he never gets hit once!
Add to this the fact that every shot of his is bang on target and the frustration quickly becomes real. In real life, the good guy wouldn’t even be able to get past 1 machine gun let alone 10.
3. Cheesy One Liners
This cliche is shared by both the hero and the villain. You might have seen a million times when the hero is about to put the villain out of his misery or vice-versa, that they have to say something cheesy and it has to be a one liner!
Don’t get me wrong, some of these one liners are my favourite, like “Hast-la-vista baby”, “I’ll be back”, ”Yippee Ki Yay” or even “This is Sparta”, but a lot of the times they are just plain unnecessary, especially when used by the bad guy.
I mean, if you want to kill the hero, just do it. Don’t waste your time coming up with the best comebacks in the form of one liners and give the hero the opportunity to escape! Come on man, you’re supposed to be a mastermind!!
4. Car Chases
This one is another favourite one of mine and if you have seen any of the last few Fast and Furious movies, you know what I am going to say. Car chases are just beyond any applicable laws of physics known to man.
First of all, what in the heck are those cars in movies made of? Vibranium? No matter how many things they crash into, they still keep going, at full speed! Also, bullets conveniently don’t seem to have their effect here too! The hero just won’t get shot, people!
In one of the Fast and Furious movies, they literally had cars jump off from one skyscraper to the other and they were still functional! Be it driving down the hills, on roads, on boats, inside buildings, or anywhere else, your basic rules just don’t apply to car chases!!
LOL this a nice article. All points are valid and really funny of you think about it :)
Thank you :)
haha liner. i don't understand when there is long plan and villain starts to explain to hero during pointing gun to hero's face :D and then hero will untied himself and go against :D
haha exactly. Why is there a need to explain the plan when you are going to shoot him anyways!! lol
Ha ha, good post. Have you seen the die hard movie where they went to Chernobyl. Epic.
Yeah I did! LOL
LOL
Best one was one liner
Thanks!
Interesting post! Thanks! In many respects agrees with you. There are certain cliche, which almost all adhere to.
Yeah, a lot of these cliches are starting to get overused now.
Well nobody is perfect so is more easy to destroy than to do a movie :D Just a thought. Of course the regizor was sleeping when he shot Matrix bubbles or the director made a silly jock that only make sense to him, but the general idea somehow remains. Like American Beauty - There is so much beauty in the world :) Let's not forget this and the fun of course
Yeah, just for fun buddy :)
I think my favorite action movie cliché is when a car drives off a cliff and for some inexplicable reason it busts into flames before it hits the ground.
It is as if cars have some sort of exploder built into them so that if you happen to go sailing off a cliff they will kindly blow you up before you hit the bottom.
haha! I know right. Cars behave according to the director's whims. They can be either too indestructible or downright tissue paper like which crumbles on the slightest touch. Also, cars explode in movies as if they were not cars but explosives! lol
Interesting article, movies at times made me wonder how do producers come up with all this film track script on it....respect to movie producers..
Yeah, it must be a really difficult process to make a movie and respect to them for it.
Drive in theaters still exist and that is where I have seen several action packed movies. I tend to think all the car chases and excess action is just filler for a lack of scripted plot. I do not mind the one liners generally however it is unrealistic to see heroes not die from countless bullets, bombs or explosives. The fact they survive unharmed makes them appear supernatural and rival God himself. The immortal principle of characters in movies I find offensive to my biblical beliefs. What do you do? It is almost every movie out there from adult to children movies. By the way the last drive in movies I saw were Wonder Woman, Spiderman and Dispicable Me 3. We have a double feature option at our drive in theater. Thanks for sharing. - Troy
Yeah, they are all somehow immortal or at least presented that way. I know it's just movies but still some realism would do great.
I know right :D They just don't change.. Nowadays I think we can literally predict an entire action movie haha!
haha we sure can!! I have done it quite too often :D
You seem pretty cool! We should engage with each other more often. I gave you a follow :) Talk soon.
You're not alone, i never liked action movies too!
Now i'm interested to read your blog abut musicals, because i never like it as well!
We a lot in common about movies, good to know!
Cheers!
Well actually, I still like action movies to be honest but I still hate musicals! hehe
In your article doesn't look like that, me to i like action movie to have fun of It!
About musicals you're not alone!ahahahah!
Cheers!
Where does a punch in the face not equal getting knocked out? It just never happens they get up and continue fighting. Ugh
haha yeah, because they are humans 2.0. Too badass to get knocked out by a punch! lol
Bad guys fight you one at a time.
haha yeah, that one too. Only if they had some unity among them ;)
OMG You are so right... especially the about the first one... they always walk away so casually with the backs turned.
haha I know right! In some cases, they act as if they didn't even notice the explosion in the first place!
Maybe they just thought they farted 😂😂😂
LOL That would be one epic fart!!! LOL
hahha or maybe it's explosive diarrhea. hahah Okay okay. Sorry just had to say that... probably ruined all action movies for you. :)
hahahahaha!!!!! As they do often in the action movies, "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!" LOL
he he he (evil laugh)
Ever since I watched Jack Reacher every time I watch an action movie all I can think is, "Holy shit. This dude is totally a serial killer."
There's always that one movie which ruins the rest. haha
The one that always got me was in the old westerns of the 1960's when the six shooters had like hundreds of shots!
Haha!
Me, I am a stickler for accuracy!
LOL I know right!!! Self-recharging guns ;)
Haha! Yeah, I guess reloading would have slowed down the story line!
hhahhaha...you are acting here oo
I gotta say,you nailed it!
Thanks :)
Action movies and super-hero movies are really just modern-day interpretations of mythology. The ancient Greeks had their Apollo and Odysseus, while we've got Indiana Jones and whoever Liam Neeson is supposed to be. The audience really doesn't expect the same rules to apply to gods as apply to men.
That being said, I'm with you on disliking these movies. I find it too difficult to identify with characters that don't face the same consequences for their actions as we do. If I wanted to hear stories about gods and magical creatures, I'd go to church!
That is an interesting thought!!
Nice post and loved the facts
things that are being done in today's movies
I love this man....!!!
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https://steemit.com/movies/@dell95/which-is-your-favorite-scene-from-guardians-of-the-galaxy-vol-2-2017