Why Little Jimmy (6) Will Only Accept 💰Crypto💰 For His Birthday 🍰🎁🎂

in #funny7 years ago

THE BLOCKCHAIN BLOWTORCH - After a long, frustrating bear market winter, cryptocurrencies finally seem on the rise again. This has not gone unnoticed by the average investor, including little Jimmy Watson from Topeka, Kansas. This Sunday, Jimmy will be celebrating his 6th birthday with friends and family. He is now asking invitees to 'stop buying him crappy presents' and simply convert these into a cryptocurrency of their choice and transfer the amount straight into his digital wallet.

                          

'You've gotta be blind as a bat not to see the long-term investment potential of cryptocurrencies like Bitcoin and Ethereum,' Jimmy told our reporter. 'Don't get me wrong. I'm far from a professional swing trader or dedicated HODLer, and I still enjoy more conventional toys like fidget spinners or my Xbox or whatever, but at my age you simply have to start thinking about the future. If I'd put that fifty bucks grandma gave me last year straight into Stellar or Cardano, I would have made a killing by now. Just saying.'

Still, Jimmy's parents are quick to temper their son's bullish sentiment and advise him to only invest what he is prepared to lose, and diversify his financial portfolio. 'Yeah duh,' the boy immediately snapped, 'Diversification is key. Every noob knows that. I'm looking at traditional commodities like oil and gold as well, by the way. But let me make you a solid prediction for the coming years. Crypto is the future. I even heard Ripple is about to partner with the Tooth Fairy. Massive moonshot incoming.'


The Blockchain Blowtorch does not provide financial advice in any way. Then again, if you were to believe anything we write, you've probably lost all your money on Bitconnect anyway.

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Coins mentioned in post:

CoinPrice (USD)📈 24h📈 7d
ADACardano0.212$19.49%46.9%
BTCBitcoin8081.450$17.17%21.32%
ETHEthereum513.476$20.27%38.32%
XLMStellar0.244$15.83%26.14%
XRPRipple0.633$22.89%32.92%

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