As a parent we think we know what's best for our kids, after all we have many years of living on this planet and our experience shows us the truth about things, right?
Well, I like to challenge that idea, as I believe it is just an idea. Our minds and actions have been limited greatly by conditioning and our perspectives, and though our experience may show us things that have proven to be true in our own experience, that doesn't mean it is necessarily so for anyone else!!
Gaming is one of those things that many parents seem to have a lot of worry and frustration about. Sitting in front of a computer all day is not what we have believed to be a healthful reality, especially for our children, even though MANY adults do it all day long, even here on Steemit. I wrote about my experience with my son Carlos, who was a gamer as a teenager, and the fears I had to face to actually support his passion.
You can read about it in Part I of Parent of a Gamer.
Now I'd like to share with you about another gamer I know, and a bit from my perspective in witnessing his engagement of the game World of Warcraft.
@quinneaker was raised in an unschooling environment -- which means ideally learning his own way, in his own time, with his own interests, to be the person he came on this planet to be. He therefore has had some incredible experiences that most people have never had, delving deep into his passions and getting the most out of every moment through the life of his own design.
I have known Quinn's family since Quinn was a teenager. His mother was an icon in the unschooling community as she ran an International Conference bringing people from all over the world and all walks of life together to explore freedom in education and to rethink everything with some of the most influential cutting-edge speakers on education.
The watchful eyes of this entire expansive unschooling community were on Quinn and his siblings, to see what would become of children if we truly honored their path and allowed them freedom. Quinn, being one of the oldest unschoolers most of us have ever known, was constantly in the limelight, as the examples of raising children in such a manner were few. I too watched Quinn, as he was older than my children, and I wanted to see what could become of my own choices of unschooling, a lifestyle that was very much against the grain of "normal" living.
What I witnessed was quite astounding as he empowered himself to experience life to the fullest.
Here are a few of my observations of @quinneaker's choices
as a teenager and young man in his 20s:
- A self-motivated body builder, nutrition specialist, and health expert
- Up and coming high fashion model in LA
- Lived homeless by choice to experience life on the streets
- Lived in the woods in Alaska by his own choosing with only a knife
- Traveled (mostly backpacking and hitch hiking) extensively throughout the U.S. and abroad
- Sat in meditation for 4 years, attaining his full-life awakening and becoming an enlightened master
Quinn, having achieved and experienced so many profound realities, continued on his path of discovery. He prayed to the Universe to show him true passion. He had no idea that what would be presented to him would be a video game!! Though it didn't seem likely that gaming would be an empowered choice or a revolutionary experience, Quinn followed his interest and delved deeply into the computer gaming world for a good solid 16 hours a day, uninterrupted, full force.
Now it was no wonder that when the unschooling community heard Quinn was playing a video game there was LOTS of judgment. How can a young man with such potential be wasting his life sitting behind a computer screen, with no purpose, no drive and no benefit to himself or the greater community? There was a lot of expressed disappointment that this is where the unschooling path could lead, and a possible huge waste of his human potential. A lot of fear and discussion was raised about the gaming scenario, and we all watched with bated breath while Quinn held true to his passion, in spite of all the judgment, and rose quickly to the top of his league, creating many characters and activating opportunities for intense challenge.
I was close friends with Quinn's mom. Quinn and my son were both gaming at the same time, so we had many many opportunities to share our insights and fears of the unknown. Quinn continued to play the game for a solid year from the time he awoke from slumber with fervent drive to play, until he could barely stay awake and on top of his game. He literally lived in the depths of that gaming reality! Quinn told me that there was nothing as challenging in real life as when playing, and that everything and everyone else paled in comparison to his exciting experience of WOW!
Quinn became one of the most valued speakers at his mom's and other unschooling conferences around the world, sharing his vast experience in a life of freedom, including his play in the world of games.
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From my experience with my son and in knowing Quinn through the years, I have come to a few realizations:
- Playing the game to the deepest and fullest place possible, without worry about getting in trouble, being coerced away from it, timed or limited in any way, one can truly receive the magic of the experience. Full on, moment-to-moment presence is extremely powerful.
- Organization, on-the-spot judgment calls, constant re-evaluation, rapid response, critical thinking, and awareness of multiple realities at the same time are all greatly enhanced.
- Intense, uninterrupted focus heightens that ability on other facets of this physical life as well.
@quinneaker is one of the most focused, inspired, capable, inventive and passionate people I know. I believe that unschooling helped to keep Quinn's mind open and allow infinite possibility to enter. His enlightened awareness of infinite possibility sparked his inspiration for creating the @gardenofeden, and playing WOW has been an incredible asset in his ability to not only implement, but efficiently and effectively run, this multi-faceted cutting-edge operation.
Although I cannot attribute all of his strengths to playing a video game, I am certain, from first hand experience, that it has benefitted him greatly even years beyond his play, as he is addressing all the most important facets and ills of this world's existence through creating an entirely new paradigm, with many challenges, and the need for creative thinking, rapid recall, decision making and maneuvering through obstacles.
Immersing oneself to the depths of the soul in true passion is something that few ever really experience. Surrounding ourselves with people who encourage and support our passions will help us build our lives on those things that make us feel alive!!
Building our lives based on passion makes life truly rewarding.
Just imagine being surrounded by people who are living their passions--
oh what a different world this would be!!!
All things considered, what else is there to do?
Quinn is writing here on Steemit about parenting (as he is on subjects of great importance).
Introducing the Amazing Qiqi. My First Born Daughter
New Interview with VoyageDallas Magazine
Introduction to My New Paradigm Perspective on Parenting and Education
Here are a few of my other posts on parenting and children:
What Can We Do Besides Disciplining/Punishing Our Children?
Disciplining Children - Questioning the Norm
Simple Joys of Nature - Living with Children and Mother Nature
Life In Community - How Does That Play Out For The Children?
No Shoulds, Have-Tos, or Musts - Growing a Life of Freedom - Empowered and Immersed in Unconditional Love
My Golden Steemit Best Undiscovered Author Award Winning Post - Imagine the Potential for Life If Children Grew Up With True Freedom In a World of Self Design- A living Example
Parts 1, 2, 3 and 4 of What's Up With School Anyway?
Parent of a Gamer I
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This was a really interesting read for me @everlove! I would love to know more about the 4 years of meditation. Has he written about that?
I don't believe he has @richardcrill, but it will be a great read when he does!!! I've never known anyone who has had the experienced outcome he has--it's fascinating to witness every single day!! Glad you're here Richard. Thanks for the read.
Thank you @everlove! I will be looking forward to that. Glad you're here too :)
Grateful to see your interest. There are MANY things I would LOVE to write about here on Steemit. The more demand the more likely my supply.
Bless~*~
My dear, thank you for this article. I am always thinking how you can grow the child for him/her being able to live his own life not something the world dectates him/her to be. You series just makes me feel more relief what it could be done and with great success. I especially thank you for sharing your own experience - it has been a talk with my husband for the whole evening that I am so happy I found you here and can learn a lot. We do not have children yet but the question of raising them with free spirit is a constant discussion for us. It helps so much knowing that there are people who are doing the same! Much love and blessings to you!
Awe----how great it is that you are already on the path of engaging what is in the best interest of your future children. I am always so stoked to witness people who have that much enthusiasm and awareness to be looking for solutions even before there are questions.
I'm so glad to have brought you some information of value and know that we have much to share--our meeting is no coincidence. Thanks for your presence here. I am thrilled to hear of your dedication to freedom. What a blessing you are giving humanity. Keep on questioning--it's a wise move indeed @sashagenji.
Thank you, dear. As always I am reading your comments with a smile on my face%)) Yo are definitely a great source of answers for my endless questions! Thank you for being here and being always you%)) A shiny women with an enormous heart full of love%))@everlove
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Awe dear one! What a great comment and a sweet piece of true beauty to top it all off. My life is so full of blessings. Thank you @sashagenji for finding me and for engaging the questions. Our lives are all better for the gifts from one another. So grateful to share with you and for this beautiful gesture!!! <3 <3 <3
Maybe it is just because you are true blessing yourself so the other blessings are attracted to you. I saw your collaborative Art project - it is a true masterpiece - now I am thinking what to do with the image you suggested! I have an idea so hopefully will manage it in few days! Love and blessings, beautiful soul!
YES!!!! I am so glad you're inspired to join us. This artists' community is truly amazing--so much love! I am blessed with many blessings and so grateful to be in alignment with that! And look---here you are!!!
Interesting how this turned out to be a gaming post by a parent and they wrote about how they became part of the experience. My parents always ignored the games and used the video game stuff as a way to ignore me and keep me home instead of going out and partying as a teenager.
Yes that too is a very valid experience @jamie-smith. You are definitely not alone. Parents use television, computers and videos as babysitters as well. People express their fears and dysfunctions in interesting ways. It truly is up to us parents to change ourselves so this next generation has a chance to really thrive instead of just survive, or up to the next generation in the know that there is something different, to step into their power and make it happen. Hopefully this new generation is not as fearful and limited by conditioning as their parents who often feel powerless to change what they don't even know they can change. I truly appreciate your comment.
Love and look forward to meeting with this philosophy in person.
May we be blessed for it to be so @virtualgrowth!!! <3
May it be so~*~
Very interesting and surprising read @everlove. I might need to adjust my way of thinking when it comes to games.
I know I had to adjust my way of thinking--or just feel uncomfortable about it all the time my son was playing. It felt way better to adjust my perspective and be in support, rather than to use my energy on trying to control him or keep him from doing what he loved. So glad I found a better way to look at and feel about it. Changed my perspective on a lot of things!!!
Glad to have you here @opheliafu. <3
Read this with great pleasure (even despite the fact my english is a bit not enough:).
You're wonderful! If I understood all the text right - you really are:)
In fact I never had any problems with gaming (I mean worrying my parents with it), cause when I first saw World of Warcraft I was already somewhere around 25 and was married. So, my husband introduced me to the game. I didn't stuck for long, but it really helped me.
How?
The games graphic is something out of this world, and it game me A LOT of inspiration for drawing and improving my skills:)
Oh so grateful for your coming here even though English is not your first language. This is a great way to challenge your language skills.
There are lots of adults playing games and I think it's really cool how a couple can share such a powerful experience when they both engage such a reality.
I have sat through many a game being played by my son and @quinneaker. I couldn't have cared less about the game, but the graphics were astounding!!!! The colors and everything about the design is incredibly inspiring and I too gained much from WOW without even playing as artists take advantage of such opportunities. Great point @inber. Thanks for your comment.
Great to read this. Just what I needed :) My eldest son (almost 8) is a gamer, he watches gamers on youtube, eats, drinks and sleeps games. Of course he does other things too....But even though I was worried a bit about the time he plays, I noticed the following: he pretty much taught himself to read. He read 3 and 4 letter words, when he was 4, now he's not even 8 and he spells out words a child his age wouldn't know in school. He is great at maths, and he loves solving problems. He wants to learn about programming and he just started an online course for animation. I never told him to do this, he came up with it himself. And all of this came from his love for gaming. I'm a lot less worried, he'll be just fine. (at the same time he is also an outdoor child with a ball),
It's funny how fearful we are about the unknown. I applaud you for holding space for his personal interests to take form and for observing the great rewards he is receiving from following his passion. It's pretty hard when we see them "just sitting", even though we don't really know what is happening while they "just sit"!!! Children are wired differently than we are, high techno capabilities are already part of their reality.
My son was an international swimmer and was very well socialized and got a huge amount of exercise. It feels really good not to worry or be concerned for their abilities to engage in what is valuable to them. I'm sure your son is already benefitting not only from the game, but from your support. It sounds like you are providing some powerful opportunities even for such a young child. Way to go!!!
So grateful you stopped by here @misslasvegas. I appreciate your comment.
Upvoted and also resteemed :)
WooHoo!!! Thanks @wvw. I'll stop your way too and see what inspires you!
You got some really great photos in here. Nice piece, thanks!
Thanks!! Photography and children are two of my passions. I'm grateful to share it all with you @rawpride. Thanks for being here.
I like your writing @everlove
I really enjoy line to line at this articel .
Thank you for sharing .. Keep steem on @everlove
You're welcome @azissuloh. I love it when we can share things that are important to us. Thank you for coming to my blog and for your comment on my post. I appreciate your taking the time to write.
As the mother of an unschooled 12-yr-old son who enjoys a lot of time on his computer,
this is encouraging to read.
Thanks,
Thanks for your comment @canadian-coconut. I know when I was parenting my younger children that I would have also loved to hear a perspective that could calm my fears. I'm grateful that you found it of value. It's truly great how Steemit is connecting us so we can all up our game, so to speak!! I appreciate you!
Hay @everlove Wow lovely photos Nice Post Voted & Followed
I always follow your journey whether it is Travel or Other !!
I Wish You Would Also Follow and Upvote My Post @funnystuff
Really I Liked What You Do Every Day
And Always Join - Upvote - Comment and Reesteem
I wish the same
Thank You Sweet
Thanks for the upvote and follow @funnystuff. I also stopped your way. Love the healthful things you share. Upvoted and followed you as well.
Grateful to share value with you!
Very interesting. I didn't know you've known him for so long!
Gaming has always had a 'bad' reputation among parents. Their kids seemed off, uninterested and there has even been research on if it made kids more aggressive and violent or not.
However, also gaming has adapted by communities. My guess is Asia is where it stared, but eSports have become a giant thing. People make a living out of playing games in championships or just streaming on a daily basis on Twitch. And they earn A LOT. Also education has shown some interest by introducing eSports scholarships.
However, I still think it is sometimes stuck in people's brain that gaming is bad, because you're not engaging with your surroundings. You're not social, you're locking yourself up and what not. But in the end, gaming can also be a great solution.
Thanks for commenting @sjennon.
We have become a society that has accepted norms, and even when those norms don't harm anyone else, we still feel the need to control. Not being social is one of those things that people are afraid of as it emphasizes their own social anxiety or if they are gregarious and very social, they often feel others ought to be too.
There are so many opportunities that require the skills of gaming. It will be interesting to see how the future unfolds in alignment with gamer skills.
Loved your comment!!! Thanks for your input! <3
I enjoyed commenting on your post! It's a very interesting perspective.
I couldn't agree more. I am looking forward to see what the future brings.
I have no doubt it will be surprising!!!
Wonderful read - and o so true - what a wonderful world it would be ....
It is possible if we all were brave enough to take the step for ourselves. Thanks for your presence here @anneke.
I read all wow @quinneaker is like a hero!!! ^ ^ AMAZING
A super hero for certain! Great job recognizing it @yusaymon!
Hello please kindly like my post too thanks
https://steemit.com/advice/@romantic4/dream-big
Your going to have to do a lot better than that to succeed here. UP YOUR GAME.
Provide something of value.