Video games are social!
And
Video games are ADDICTIVE
Some people are lucky enough to be able to play once or twice a week, and stop whenever they please.
For them, video games have little negative impacts on their lives.
But for those of us who play daily, the negatives impact gaming has on our lives is undeniable.
You Probably Wouldn't Be Able To Stop Gaming If You Tried
If you're like me, you probably think,
" Fuck yeah I can stop whenever I want!"
"Piece of cake!"
You see, I used to think I really LOVED playing video games, and it was my own free will which kept me playing everyday.
Besides! I couldn't see how bad gaming really was for me, I was too busy thinking about getting that next rank on CSGO.
But, it wasn't until I started college where I started to realize.... Hey, I think my gaming hobby is really getting in the way of the things I have to do...
What Happened Next Made Me See That I Had A REAL Problem
The constant procrastination caused by playing video games was an issue, so I took one night to take a deep look at my life.
My grades were poor, and I was in panic mode. I knew this decision had to be made.
So I decided I would QUIT playing video games for good!
I've tried slowing down my gaming a couple of times, but that never worked. I couldn't control myself and would end up gaming for hours on end.
So in order to help make sure I quit cold turkey, I had to try new tactics.
I joined a sub-Reddit called StopGaming, in order to learn more about how people made the switch to quit, and so I can be part of this community that can maybe give me encouragement to stop.
I also told a few of my close friends that I was quitting, so I could have some form of accountability I would have to hold up to.
Then came the hard part...
The First Day
Easiest thing I've ever done.
Not once did I sit down at my computer or even think about getting on there to play.
I went back to the gym and hung out with of few of my friends that day.
After coming home, I took care of some household duties and spent some time with my family.
That night, I was EXTREMELY confident that I could hold this quitting streak forever.
Until reality set in....
If you think gaming is just a hobby, you are so very wrong.
People are social creatures. We NEED and Desire physical social interaction and movement. We are not built for the gaming lifestyle.
But we are fooled into thinking so.
You see, video games are designed to trigger the brains reward system.
Whenever you complete a task or an objective in a game, you are always rewarded some how be it by points, score, exp, etc.
This then causes your brain to release Dopamine, which is a neurotransmitter that control the brain's reward and pleasure centers.
Dopamine makes us feel good. It effects our mood and our way of life. Activities that cause a dopamine release can become extremely addictive; activities like eating, kissing, listening to music, all cause a dopamine release.
Drugs like cocaine and heroin also cause a huge dopamine release. The “reward” associated with that release can lead to drug abuse and addiction.
Once you cut off that high dopamine releasing source, which in my case was video games, the low levels of dopamine which your brain is not used to getting causes a wide range of symptoms...
Soon after the initial quitting stage, I started experiencing symptoms EXTREMELY similar to those experienced by drug users who relapse.
And worst of all, I felt sorrow.... sorrow because I realized how much of my life had been wasted doing nothing.
Achieving meaningless goals online that had no value.
Sorrow because I had wasted so much precious time of my life that I could have been spending with family, spent in front of a computer monitor like a zombie.
I realized how many friendships I pushed away because of my gaming addiction.
I realized how many opportunities I've missed because of my gaming addiction.
But most importantly, I realized I did not love gaming like I thought I did.
I realized I Was Addicted.
I now know that I was using video games as a way to hide from issues that I never wanted to confront.
Video Games was my drug.
I didn't need Weed or Cocaine or Alcohol
because I had video games
and in the eyes of the public, video games are no-where comparable to these drugs.
So I could play my entire life away and nobody would see it as a real issue.
But let me tell you something.
It is a very REAL issue.
Unfortunately, even after my realizations, it wasn't enough to change my ways.
After about 2 weeks into quitting, the temptations became too much and the only way I could make myself feel better was to keep playing.
I think it's because the problems I was hiding from all along never truly went away, and when I didn't have video games to distract me from them, I fell back into my old ways.
I'm not sure if I will ever quit.
But, I really hope this post can help shed some light on the issue of gaming.
Maybe you can relate to this. If you think you really love playing video games, take a moment to ask yourself.
I didn't really speak about this in my introduction post because I wasn't sure if I would stay on steemit for long.
But, I felt it was time to share a little more about myself.
Here's some links if you want to learn more about video game addiction, or if you think you might be addicted and want to look for help:
My Original Post On The StopGaming SubReddit 1 Month Ago:
StopGaming SubReddit:https://www.reddit.com/r/StopGaming/
Some Info About Gaming Addiction:http://www.addictionrecov.org/Addictions/?AID=45
Info About How Your Brain Responds To Drug Use And Dopamine Release:https://www.drugabuse.gov/publications/drugs-brains-behavior-science-addiction/drugs-brain
I do not own any of the images used in this post
Here's links to the images used:
(1)
(2)
(3)
Sorry about this more personal post, they aren't very well received, I know.
But, if this post makes anyone realize that they might have a gaming addiction too, then it was 100% worth it.
Thanks for sharing your story @illestbambi . I personally feel it's good to open up rather than being mute about it. When you open up you that means you have at least realized the problem and are at least conscious about it. A lot of people out there are suffering and the sad part is they don't recognize it. I have been a gaming lover myself but thankfully it never was an addiction. There were times when I played 12 hours a day. The only suggestion I can give you is to accept that it is just a phase in your life and be okay about it. In parallel consciously start to reduce the play time. Even 10 minutes each day reduction would become an hour after just a week. All the best!
I appreciate the advice and support man :)
My play time has definitely decreased significantly compared to my high school days, but I still gotta work at it.
Thank you again!
hey @illestbambi!
Man, this resonates pretty deep with me. I definitely have some addictive relationships with games. It's intense, huh. I really appreciate you sharing this with us, though...it's always better to get it out then to hold it in.
It's been a THING in my life. Much like yours it sounds like. I don't know how...but by some grace of the universe, I think it's becoming less of a thing. I have realized that I need to have places to focus my energy. Steem has been part of that lately for me. Also, I've been building a house.
At any rate, I think there is going to be a strong need for us all supporting each other around this. Your experiences are really valuable, and I truly believe that your higher self(soul, spirit, godflame, whatever, YOU) chose the path you did because it is important, and because there's something there you wanted to learn, but god I can fucking resonate with that feeling loss, of seeing how all those hours add up. It can be crushingly hard to witness...
I once heard someone say
So we're halfway there!!! =) ahah, anyway brother...the fact that you recognize your relationship and have the bravery to stand up to it is amazing!! and you're cutting edge. There are SO MANY PEOPLE who haven't yet been able to stand up and acknowledge this, and they're going to want help, tomorrow...the day after, next week, ten years from no...they're going to need people who've been through the trenches.
Definitely following you, looking forward to what may come =)
Thank you so much for the feedback man, I really appreciate the encouragement and support.
It definitely isn't an easy thing to overcome, even after realizing the issue I still find it hard to fight the urges.
But like you said, half way there.
I followed you in return :)
This post received a 21% upvote from @randowhale thanks to @illestbambi! For more information, click here!
Nothing is healthy in excess. I do not care to admit it but I was addicted to buying brand new game systems as they came out. But I had a change of heart and realized a fancier one will come down the road a few years later. My wallet thanks me.
It is tough to put such a personal post on here. Hang in there. We got you :).
Always yours,
I'm glad you were able to make the change!
Thank you for the support too!
Congratulations @illestbambi!
Your post was mentioned in my hit parade in the following category:
Hi Illestbambi! thanks for your honest account. Like any drug, the dose makes the poison. A bit and it is medicine, too much of anything will kill you (even water!).
I think you have figured out that your are nearing the bad end of the spectrum. That is actually great!
I found Jordan Peterson to have some fascinating insights: Here he is talking about video games in particular:
The fragment is part of this one but unfortunately could not find the context:
the whole video is pretty epic in scope and starts off with some political stuff in which Peterson got caught up in.
But it expands it to very interesting discussions about having a purpose in life and how not having any impacts us (especially if you are a young man)
His explanation of psychology is one of the most accessible and yet profound I have found so far.
Basically the first fragment is talking about how people feel that they have no control over life retreat in video games. Because there they do feel they have control. The solution he seems to suggest is to find a purpose in a responsibility to shoulder.
But you should start with cleaning your room of course :)
(seriously) he started this internet meme but the idea behind it is quite profound I think!
I just watched the full interview Joe Rogan had with Peterson,
and man that guy Peterson has some interesting ideas.
It's funny because I actually do have a fairly messy room and I've had a manager at my job tell me before that if you're room is messy, then it will reflect in your every day life.
Thank you for the encouragement and for sharing these videos, they are quite interesting.
Glad you liked them : it's funny that some guests of Tim Ferriss also had a related hack ( all in his book "Tools of Titans") : Several of them start the day, no matter what, with making up their bed . The reason again is deceptive : it's not about the tidyness. It is a brain hack, by doing that you start your day with a sense of control and accomplishment, no matter how small the task.
Another thing I'd say is that you don't need to just quit, you need to replace it with something meaningful (to YOU!). Like Peterson says : we do better with responsibility. Try to help someone today, even if it is helping your Grandmother do groceries as a matter of speaking . Don't overreach, build in ever expanding concentric circles, increasing your competence. Volunteering for something might be an interesting experiment. Research some more about digital addiction and distraction : it is a huge problem . I know professional adults who are starting to get in trouble with their professional commitments because they miss appointments because they were messing about with Facebook, Whatsapp and such. Experiment on yourself with tricks and hacks and then help others !
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Hi, thanks for posting this,I am a gamer and also have challenges getting my head out of the monitor but recently I have discovered occupying myself with other things create less time for me to sit down for hour playing video games... Sometimes i even take my console to my neighbors place and let the kids have it for some time so I don't really get to see it or have the temptation to play so often
Thank you for sharing!
I thought of giving my pc and consoles to a friend for a while but that didn't work well for me.
I'm glad it worked for you though!
Excellent post about trying to give up something you enjoy too much. As a writer for a video game website, I understand playing too many games. Ironically, trying to write about them for a living was what pushed me to back off on the hobby a little bit. It's like reading a great book for school: never as much fun when you have to read it as it is when you chose to read it.
I wish you all the success the future holds, Zey.
Thank you, I appreciate the feedback and the support :D
Great discussion that I agree needs more attention. My brother and I used to spend days and nights nonstop playing videogames, especially once we figured out how to connect a LAN network and play together on our computers. Looking back, I believe we were very much addicted to it.
It really affected me in my relationships and in my early college years as well. I believe part of the reason my ex-fiance left me is that I spend so much time playing videogames rather than giving her the attention she deserved. Again, looking back, I probably was addicted and couldn't stop rather than thinking this was just to pass the time. I'm not saying its the main reason, but I can certainly see it as a part of the reasoning.
I spend countless hours on videogames in college as well and I do believe I could've been a much more impressive student had I spent that time studying and preparing for a future. Even in my later years of college life as I began to focus on my major, I spent a large amount of time in videogame world.
To this day I still spend probably far more time in videogames than I should, but I will be honest, it's just much easier to enjoy a game than deal with life's harsh realities and, I think, that's a big part of what gets people hooked.
Thank you so much for sharing man,
I can relate to a lot of what you're saying.
It's a very weird feeling you get when playing video games.
When you're playing, its almost like you're living in a care free world. No stress.
But, when you aren't playing and you look back on the time spent playing, for me at least, I feel regret.
Not to say that I haven't met great people playing video games and had amazing fun, but it's just a drastically opposing feeling I get when I think of the time I spend playing, as opposed to when I'm in the act of playing.
Thank you again for sharing!
While it can be bad, you're right, there's good to be had from it. I would argue there are far worse things to be addicted to.
Absolutely right about that one.
@illestbambi Thanks for sharing your story with such a great informative post. I have a little brother who I've warned about the dangers of excessive gaming, but my advice has had little resonance with him. I will show him this post along with the links you provided and hopefully it will paint a better picture of the dangers for him.
Thanks again, keep up the great posts!
Absolutely man,
I'm happy to help in any way I can.
Hopefully your little brother will outgrow gaming as he gets older, I know a lot of people who have!
Good luck, and thank you for the support!
Yeah I have faith he will grow out of over indulging with his xbox, thanks again, all the best!
This is a really helpful post, and I can imagine it really helping parents of children who love to play video games, and perhaps spend a bit too much time on them. Especially with today's society, where interaction with others and outdoor time seems to have taken a nose dive to almost nothing at all, it is very important to know when video game playing has become a problem instead of a hobby. Did you manage to repair any of the lost friendships that occurred during your video gaming addiction?
Thank you for the feedback!
I cannot agree with you more about helping parents deal with something like this.
If I'm honest, I wish my Mother would have done more to keep me away from video games, but I can't blame her, at the time there was very little information out there about video game addiction and there still isn't much.
It's scary to see what the world is coming too.
Everywhere you go, people are on their phones playing games or texting and just so engulfed in this virtual world that isnt real!
And to answer your question, some of the friendships I managed to keep, because they are amazing people and forgave me for the time spent away from them.
But, some others I wasn't able to, and I if I'm being honest, I really regret that.
Our friends and family are more important than anything you could possibly have or want. I still struggle to live by that statement, but I'm working on it.
Thank you for the support man!
Great post let me see if I can do something to promote it
Thanks man, I appreciate it!
There are thing in which I agree with you and others I do not have the same opinions.
Actually a lot of communities think off video games as drugs and actively fight against them.
In the end its not videogames that are the evil, its yourself. There are a lot of gamers that live fulfilling lives as well
You are right about that, I should have maybe been more specific with that statement.
I think putting the blame on the person affected by video game addiction is not exactly fair though. For a lot of gamer's, we were introduced to video games at a very young age, where it became part of our life.
If a child who is surrounded by drugs his whole life ends up becoming a drug addict, I wouldn't call them evil. Mislead maybe.
I also think there are more people who are current gaming addicts who are not living fulfilling lives, than those who are. I am not talking about your average gamer, I'm talking about addicts. But, there are always exceptions and I don't have any statistical data to argue this so I'm not saying you are wrong.
Thank you for your feedback!
As an ex addict I can say that it was a way from running from reality. Once the affected person identifies what causes him to play in the first place it becomes clear on the actions to take
100% true, I only wish the answer was in black and white.
Maybe I do know what caused me to get to this point and I'm just afraid to admit it,
but to this day I still can't seem to stop playing and I don't know why.
I had some friends that were addicted. They eventually snapped out of it though and are now leading fairly normal lives. I remember their college house would be nothing but desktop computers in their living room for playing WOW.
I know people like that too,
luckily I never got into WOW, people get really tied into that game.
Thanks for sharing man!
Sir, I applaud you for being so brave to tell this about yourself and pointing this out. I really hope that you can get over your addiction. I am a gamer myself but I have one thing that keeps me in check and that is my partner (who is anti-gamer). But this is about you. Have you tried getting professional help?
Thank you, I haven't really shared this anywhere besides here and reddit.
I play considerably less now than I use to, mainly because of work.
I'm not really into sharing my feelings and stuff like that so I don't think professionals would do much good, but thank you for the question.
You're lucky to have someone who cares about you keep you in check.
They're a keeper!
This is very real man, I used to be addicted to games as well. I think what really helped me with my addiction is finding something else to replace it. When you quit all of a sudden like that you need another activity otherwise you will be bored and that's when anxiety kicks in.
I recommend this book "The Power of Habit" - by Charles Duhigg
Hang in there man!
You are 100% right.
A lot of people say you need to occupy your time with other things.
I've tried A LOT of different things, but I always just come back to gaming.
I still enjoy my other hobbies, it's just hard to break the gaming addiction...
Thanks for the encouragement!
I was (and still) so much addicted to video games that i had to skip classes just to go home and play. I was also able to finish mu bachelors degree for 8years instead of 5years.
But i dont regret it, never did and never will.
Buy because of work i had to lessen the my time playing games. I can only play on weekends. Every now and then i play on my mobile.
Following you for future posts.
Upvoted!
Thank you for your support!
Yup, I'll admit im addicted to gaming. Even if im not gaming, I'm probably on the PC.
You're not alone man
I have to say, I spent a large amount of time playing games. Now a days, I don't really play much. Somewhere along the line between back then and not too long ago, I realized that life moves on, and that I was wasting it. The moment I realized that life was catching up, video games had become un-enjoyable. Perhaps.. If things were different, I may have continued to be addicted. I guess, if you really wanted to stop playing video games, just come to the realization that you have things to do, and time is ticking away. That's just my 2 cents though, great post btw!
Thank you!
I'm sure some day I'll be able to stop playing all together,
It's gonna take a lot of work though.
I used to be addicted back in the Xbox 360 days ... gears halo call of duty ... but now the games are mediocre
Yeah I used to be into console games pretty heavily,
I remember grinding prestige's every single COD that came out.
Once I got into PC games, it just got worse because the games got better lol.
Thank you for sharing!
I used to be a gamer. Weed and playing games is all I did and yes it was very addicting.. Happy that I have changed
What an effort. Upvoted and followed.
Thank you!
I really appreciate it.
hi, great post. I am not gamer anymore, but my little brother (he is 13 now) is a gamer, but at this young age ofcourse he doesn't see it as a bad thing and just doesn't want to stop being one. The problem is, i see the consequences. He doesn't go out very often, his grades are poor, he is too lazy to do anything, his brain is just used to different level of enjoyment. I am quite sad about this, i tried several things to help him, but i can't. I read him your post, but he did not want to hear it, i hope he will realize in the future. I guess he is too young now.
I'm sure with time he will start to realize there is much more to life than playing video games.
It took me almost 15 years to even come to that realization, and I still have much more work to do.
Just be there for him when he needs you, and hopefully he will overcome it!
Thanks for sharing and thank you for the feedback :D
I'm right there with you, def had a gaming addiction for a long time! I have my moments here and there but doing a better job at limiting the gaming. Good luck!
that was a great post !
Thank you!
I'm following you to know you better. Feel free to connect with me @lulita 😀