You've probably noticed our beloved social media site has been having some troubles as of late.
Here's my take on the problem from the standpoint of a crazy conspiracy theorists point of view..
Steemit's under attack!!!
You'll see and hear some witnesses today telling us it's just a simple DDOS attack, that everything's ok and it's just the site ontop of the blockchain being tampered with. They're telling us all not to worry..but I have information to the contrary and I'm prepared to share what I've learned with you all today..
The Timeline
I was at McDonalds this morning and I had to use the washroom, I proceeded towards the restroom while my wife ordered our food. Once inside I overheard a homeless man on the toilet talking to himself while he was having a shit. It sounded interesting so I did what any true patriot would do..
I entered the stall next to him and pressed my ear up to the wall. That's when I heard him mumbling about how North Korean hackers were under direct orders from Kim Jong Un to infiltrate this site and stop people from reading and enjoying @papa-pepper's blogs.
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It was all starting to make sense!
I ate my Egg McMuffin and digested even more information to prove my point. The newspaper on the table next to us had an article on the front page highlighting interior home design ideas, you know what that means don't you?
Our government wants to distract us with stories of the most popular seasonal colors and feng shui, meanwhile they're working hand in hand with Isis to currupt our freedoms and our god given right to blog for money.
It's a false flag!
Jet fuel can't melt steel people! Chemtrails are turning our frogs gay and the world's flat. Its obvious once you know where to look.
Last night and today's Steemit snafus are all a part of a bigger plan cooked up by the sneaky fuckers at the DPRK, in direct conjunction with the CIA. From what I gather they're working together trying to undermine freedoms and social media values.
It all makes perfect sense when you think about it.
You'll see posts from some of this site's caretakers blaming the technical glitches on the DDOS attack but the truth is, they've already been compromised.
That's right, they're working hand in hand with the terrorist organization known as the CIA to take down Steemit.
I always suspected @jerrybanfield had something to hide under that graduation cap. I'm pretty sure he's the ringleader in all of this too but I just haven't got the smoking gun quite yet. I will though so fear not people!
You can trust me
@goldenarms is on the case and you can bet your ass I'll get to the bottom of this and smoke a bag full of weed in the process.
Information is power people and I'm just arming you with the tools and information you need to become woke.
I've enlisted the help of 3 scrawny white dudes that a loosely affiliate themselves with antifa and we're prepared to fight...just aslong as it's on the weekend because they've got homework and strict curfues throughout the the week.
What you need to know now
I want all my followers to rest assured I'm on this and I won't let anything happen to Steemit, I'm one person you can trust!
Have a great night and God bless us all.
Banner by @bearone
nice work man.. you da genius :)
I'm just a humble man fighting for the truth, and all our other freedoms
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Pure genius right here, only someone with arms of gold could solve this case, where is that inspecter gadget guy at, probably following a false leed. How does one tell if a frog is guy??? Thanks brother, you're doing good things here, keep it up.
Well Ray, u can tell if a frogs gay by studying it's behavior. If one male frog is sucking the penis of another frog there's a good chance those frogs are gay. Also if they're listening to Shawn Mendes on their iPad there's atleast a 73.8% chance they're homosexual aswell. Thanks for stopping by my wacky ass blog bud I appreciate you!
"If one frog is sucking... "
Roflmao! Oh my sides!!!
Hahaha 🐸 ribbit
...still laughing!
Literally laughing out loud GA -- thaz some funny shit man!
I felt I owed it to everyone to find the answers :) Thx for checking out my post @thedamus
Always do my man!
I really don't read enough of your stuff man, that was hilarious!
If you only read one blog it should be this one. Such a wealth of information..😊
I know man. Just make sure you are well protected because they will be coming after you lol
It's all starting to make sense now. And I thought it was just @dan had spilled his latte on his keyboard.
I'm afraid it's something far more sinister my friend..
The whole system is a lie, the US government is trying to scare everybody to death, the Las Vegas Shooting/Pyhsop/Movie is just another big fatFBI/CIA/DAPA Lie
I knew it, and i knew that kim jong un had something to do with it, i mean jet fuel just couldn't melt steem and chrispy pancake in freefall speed. And nobodys suspecting the hallouminatti, the secret all seeing vegans.
Exactly @russelbury. Resteem this and help spread the message. We need to wake more people up
Haha this was golden! I swear I was like alright this is gonna be a very serious article...haha, of course, the guy in the stall next to you mentioned North Korea haha. Great post. You never disappoint.
You're sweet. Thx for checking out my crazy ass blog and not judging me for my crazy antics. U don't judge me right?.. 😊
Haha nope i definitely don't. I love these crazy antics 😀
Everything you said make so much sense, I am glad you are on the case. What's up with Kwaleh?
I fear they've already got to Kwaleh the whale. Haha Naw.. I just haven't been inspired to continue the epic quest. I'll probably work on it this weekend tho :)
You have such a witty and humorous way Loved this
Thanks alot bud! I'm just tickled I get a few ppl who enjoy whatever the hell it is that I do? 😁
:) have a great weekend my friend
I heard something more intimating.
I heard that Zuckerbarg is behind the attack :v
Don't know which to believe. :D
Who u gonna believe, that curly haired fuck or me? 😐
Probably you as you are claiming to hear someone talking. :D
Stoner.
Really funny.
Dont let the fact I smoke a ton of weed distract from the fact I'm highly intelligent and capable of solving steemits problems lol
Aah Dude you rock.
Great Post :-D
It's definitely something. Thanks for stopping by @blackrussian!
Amen to that, You da man 😉 lol
You are hilarious my friend and thank you for sharing this information we really need 😁😁 I love your humor.
Yeah well i love you ;) Thx for stopping by @saffisara!
Same right back at ya 🤗
This makes a lot of sense. I don't know how I couldn't see it all before.
It's all so clear once you take Ayahuasca and just think about it. Thanks hug master clay for stopping by!
Nods - I knew it
That is the scariest picture I've ever seen lol
Thanks for giving us the real scoop!
If something goes happens to me Julia I'll need u and vache to continue the search for the truth. I'm probably in alot of danger now :(
I stick him on patrol in the nearest McDonalds bathroom to see if he can get any intel!
That's a good idea. I get most of my information and investment advice from people on the toilet lol
Your a nut 😂😂😂😂
Yeah that's probably fair 😁 Thx for stopping by tho, hopefully u got a chuckle out if this madness atleast @aloa
In Captain Canada Weed Trust!
Thanks for stopping by my friend 😊
This is amazing. Cat life 4eva, brah!
This guy gets it! :) Thx for stopping by @anarchrysalis, appreciate it 👊😎
Scary stuff man, Glad your on the case. I just ignored it and did some yard work instead.
How could u ignore such a blatant attack on our freedoms??? 😊
Lol. This is pretty funny.
Did that meme always have a cat in it, or did you just add it?
That is the original artwork created by the illustrious @juliakpondsford III, not altered. U can't improve upon perfection :)
Holy shit man, I didn't know it was this serious! I'm buggin out, peace.
img credz: pixabay.com
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Lol ok
I trust you @goldenarms. I got your back. I am surprised though, it's the first I've heard of these gay frogs. Did you can David Suzuki to come have a look?
That's a good idea Bucky. David's one of the few ppl smart enough to decipher all of this, after myself of course 😁 I miss the nature of things, what a great show. Seriously Dr Suzuki was one of the first ppl to try to warn ppl about climate change..long before that greasy Al Gore bastard came around to make $ off it
Great post indeed. Thanks for sharing tbe insight with us. Steemit is a great platform and as it gains popularity, these hackers would try their level best to play a spoil sport. With stalwards like you around, i am sure nothing is goona stop steemit from reaching the heights it deserves. Upvoted and following u as always.
Regards Nainaz
#thealliance
I am one who was very scared and confused last night when I cannot access to my Steemit account, but thanks we are all back now.
@goldenarms has struck once again! ROFL... You get right on those slim balls.
Hi @goldenarms, I just stopped back to let you know your post was one of my favourite reads and I included it in my Steemit Ramble. You can read what I wrote about your post here.
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