Would you join me in exploring vulnerability today because I think this might be helpful for all of us to be more comfortable with our bodies?
What makes me feel most vulnerable?
The idea of putting pictures up of this body without any clothes on, or nude photos, that makes me feel most vulnerable.
I am inspired by my friend Tyler who is @wunderwoff here. We've played Xbox online for about eight years. His first pictures on Steemit were what he calls a bare art project where he's painting totally in the nude.
I actually enjoyed seeing those pictures. I feel like it's courageous to reject, essentially, the status quo that we have to have our bodies clothed at all times because our bodies are shameful. This belief says that these bodies are sex objects and we must keep them covered for politeness and for dignity. @steemed-open an @eveuncovered and @nakedbakers have also inspired me the same as Tyler has!
I like there's some judge's quote that says obscenity, he says in the quote, "I'll know it if I see it." That is in my opinion what gives an opportunity for all of us to essentially show our true selves, to be accountable to what our body looks like, to not have to be covered behind closed doors all the time.
I like what Tyler said. He said that if he goes and stands naked in front of his window in Oklahoma, that's illegal there. Someone might see him naked in his own home through the window and he could get charged with indecent exposure.
Now, that's crazy because these are our most beautiful creations. After all, I've been working on this body longer than I've been working on any post or any project online. I've been working on this body every day of my whole existence that I can at least remember, and even that I can guess out before that. I also think if we look at some other things as to why the bodies need to be clothed all the time, there's some really good opportunities in there.
I know, personally, that I'd like to see most of the people I follow on Steemit and I'm interested in following their future. I'd like for the option to be there for me to look at nude photos. I'd just be interested to see what everyone else's most beautiful creation looks like. Men and women, even old, fat or ugly. In my opinion, it makes it even more interesting because beautiful or young bodies often tend to look very similar. The old, wrinkled and fat bodies are more interesting.
I've felt a lot of shame about my desire to see people naked. I've felt that way since I saw my mom naked by accident. I was 12 years old and I don't know why, but I just barged into the bathroom when she was in the shower.
She used to spend a lot of time in the bathroom just getting ready, putting make-up on and doing her hair, and for some reason, I just barged in and she was standing there naked. She just got out of the shower and I was terrified, "Oh my God. I'm so sorry."
All of these things go all the way back to the Bible. The Old Testament talks about, "You shall not see the uncover nakedness of your parents." It's funny that even though a lot of us claim to be agnostics or atheists, or say "we don't practice these Christian things," a lot of these ideas about what we need to do with our bodies go all the way back to these Old Testament things and beyond.
Then we are essentially preaching and following them in every single thing we do, which begs the question, "Is there a better way to live?"
Even more than that, "What are the assumptions?"
What are we assuming when we suggest that for other people's safety, or for decency, we need to have our genitals clothed at all times?
It's even more ridiculous, I think, when you start looking at things like the woman's body.
Right now, I could take my shirt off in this video. It'd be no problem. I could take this shirt off and put this on YouTube and on Facebook. While there might be derogatory comments, that would be no issue. Just posting the photo below on Steem launched at least one entire post citing this photo as the reason I am awful!
Now, if my wife were to do the exact same thing, not even to expose anything below the waist, but if she just took her shirt off and posted a video or a photo on Facebook, even though she's been a user for a long time, she would probably get banned immediately. The photo will be flagged and taken down.
On YouTube, if she did that, she could get her channel penalized, if she had one. Potentially, if she did it multiple times, she could get banned from YouTube for literally just taking her shirt off.
I think that's crazy because of the assumptions that underlie the reasons for this.
Why is it necessary for a woman to keep her chest covered?
Why is it necessary for men and women to keep their genitals covered at all times?
Unless you're in the home having sex, which theoretically should only be done for procreative purposes and theoretically should only be done between a man and his wife, because if you're getting into all this Bible stuff that says, "We have to be clothed all the time," then you're getting into all that stuff too.
I think if we really want freedom, it comes down to leading by example. I think one of the big reasons, the assumptions behind why we can't be naked are the following: men are beasts, men are animals.
If a man were to be exposed to the nakedness of a woman, then he might commit an act of violence against that woman.
Even men on men, if men are around other men's nakedness, men are such predators that they are likely to commit an act of violence against other men.
This is the underlying assumption I see for why we need to be clothed all the time.
In the US at least, in my past especially, I used to talk down about countries where women had to be clothed like some of the countries where women have to have veils and cover their whole bodies. I used to purely see those countries as backwards and foolish.
What I realize is that while many of us focus on the women's rights, that the women should be able to show their face and maybe a little more skin than a foot or an ankle, while it's easy to focus on the women's rights in that respect, we also need to focus on the men's rights.
Men should have the right to feel that if they see the nakedness of a woman, they are not such a beast that they must commit an act of violence. That to me is one of the huge underlying shameful things that we don't talk about in our collective world and you can see it.
I noticed as a young man that there's a lot of fear between young men and young women. When I go to the grocery store, and while older men and women as well as children would very frequently make eye contact with me and smile, often younger women especially, tend to be afraid to even be near me. It's not me as a person, it's me as a man.
The fear is that young men are such beasts that if you were to present a naked woman in front of them, they couldn't really be blamed for going through with the act of violence, that young women are such victims that if they were to present themselves naked, they would just be totally helpless to do anything about it.
I think that when we're willing to show our nakedness on something like Steemit, which is a social network that is censorship resistant, decentralized, and allows us to post naked photos we are tearing down some of these huge, shameful, stereotypes or laws that have been written into our way of living.
When people like my friend Tyler have the courage to present their naked photos, we are breaking down the barriers between us.
Yet, even though intellectually I know this, I've been emotionally conditioned that it's not okay for me, that I would be a pervert to show my nakedness to anyone besides my wife. If I do that, I'm a pervert and that's why I feel very vulnerable, even considering posting pictures of simply the truth.
My naked body is simply the truth.
It exists.
It's what is underneath the clothing.
It's not something made up, and not in a sexual way either.
Just factual.
Here it is.
Then there's no more secrets.
There's no more of these little games, like trying to compensate for things.
There's the facts.
I think the world I want to live in, a world where we are not afraid of each other, is a world where we're willing to be naked and feel safe about it. Imagine a group of people just feeling safe sitting in a room naked with each other. In my opinion, this is our very basic humanity. That's a humanity where we all feel loved, safe and connected.
A humanity where there's not these weird things where a woman has to go cover up her flesh to go breastfeed, and go hide in a room or put on a cover, and that if we are allowed to see nakedness, then it won't be something we are ashamed of.
I've obviously looked at a lot of nakedness in my life and I felt ashamed about it. For the first time, Steemit is empowering me to see the nakedness of others and to not feel ashamed of it, to not feel like I'm doing something wrong or perverted by simply seeing another body.
Would you like me to have the courage to go forward with this?
Not that you would have to look or need to look.
Do you think this is something worth doing?
This makes me feel most vulnerable, that I would post something like that, and then maybe everyone would look at it. Then, any time I'd see and interact with people, they would have seen me naked at my most travel-size genital ratio.
"Travel size" is how I like to refer to it when it's essentially normal.
I value your opinion on this because I've seen several other people on Steemit, men and women, who are having the courage to open up and share their bodies, a social network that allows us to do that, and actually even pays us for our courage.
Do you think that's something worth doing?
Thank you for reading this today because some of these are the seemingly little or pointless things we might work on that make a huge change in our world, that allow us to unplug from the matrix of stereotypes, expectations, and Old Testament rules.
Even though we go around saying things like, "God damn it," or "I'm an atheist," or "I don't believe in God," or "I don't know about God," we go around obeying the Old Testament in our way of living, as if it's a fact. We condemn others who aren't obeying it as if it is a fact.
Not that there's anything wrong with the Old Testament rules, but "Hey, is this the world we want to live in?"
What kind of world do you want to live in today?
A world where I don't go through with sharing?
I already asked my wife and she said that it seems more reasonable than some of the other things I've already shared online. She sees no problem with it. I think it'd be great if she posted her pictures online.
I think she could probably earn $100 a post on Steemit. I would certainly upvote them. My wife has a beautiful body. Why shouldn't anyone be welcome to see it, who would like to see it, and to just look?
There we go, that's my thought for today.
I love you.
You're awesome.
I hope you have a wonderful day today.
Final words
Thank you very much for experiencing this episode of Happier People Podcast with me, which was originally filmed as the video below!
The feedback on the video was so positive that I spent about $100 to get this post created for you here out of the video, and then edited it prior to publishing! I appreciate you being here and I hope you have a wonderful day today.
If you found this post helpful on Steemit, would you please upvote it and follow me because you will then be able to see more posts like this in your home feed?
Love,
Jerry Banfield with edits by @gmichelbkk
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I think you are getting in the wrong path here Jerry, nudity is a controversy subject.
i think you better keep talking about the same subjects that gained you, your current position on steemit..
Very interesting post !!!
Interesting topic. I'm not ready to go there yet.
I agree! I live in Panama where women breastfeed without a cover (like I used to do in the US). I've wondered what they would think of me if I get pregnant and use a cover in public. Would they think I am the weird one? Not that I think these women are weird...that's just the way it is here and in the US. What is culturally acceptable. The indigenous used to walk around here basically with no clothes on, but have since taken over a clothed view of life. I don't know that we would have moved our children here had there been a majority of naked people around. I'm in a group on facebook and someone posted a picture of a naked lady showering in the street in Panama City. It was quite interesting to see the reactions. Interesting post @jerrybanfield.
Very different cultures for sure.
Human history proves that the need for clothes came after humans started to lose hair from their body and they had to find a way to survive on weather conditions. In other words, they never had problems to see each other naked. The problem started when religions tried to impose their beliefs into humans knowing very well that the basic instinct is the core for controlling, not only humans but every living species on the planet. Regarding the Holy Books... have you ever thought that there may be an allegorical meaning inside the scripts?
Just a thought...
Let's move on... @Jerrybandfield with respect to your face, what I get from your video reminds me the Pussy riot female music group with their "activities" running almost naked inside Moscow's Cathedral of Christ the Savior back in 2012.
No , I am not trying to be conservative, I am just exposing some thoughts. Couldn't be better instead of exposing our naked body, as an expression of freedom, to expose our truth and compassion in our everyday communication between each other? In other words, instead of being naked from outside shall we start being naked from inside for a good start ?
thx for sharing
I personally took measures I wouldn't advise of others in self-experimentation a long time back that allowed me to remove fear as a factor from my mental processes, which lands me in those rare circumstances.
Even without fear however, I still experience vulnerability.
The lesson is much the same as that of the classic trust exercise where you place your trust in someone else and fall backwards, in that it is a great feeling to become vulnerable and be caught, but it is just as potent a negative force when that vulnerability is presented and betrayed.
I have also met people who are perpetually vulnerable, and speak about how life is so joyous, but the beneath that thin veil I can see their pain and torment far more clearly than I care to. They try to deny shame, fear, and questions of self worth completely, but they are completely bound by them beneath that facade.
Vulnerability can be a wonderful thing or a terrible torment, and to me nothing demonstrates that quite as well as the vulnerability that people experience in meaningful romantic relationships.
Sounds like some one may have worked with mother nature to find a inner meaning.
OH my yes! I know some of those perpetually vulnerable people too. Authenticity is everything. This is one of the things I like about Jerry is his authenticity is very clear.
We are brought up differently, I will never lay out a nude body on the Internet.
I agree but he did say it's conditioning since birth. I'd be uncomfortable as well.
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Hey @jerrybanfield just wanted to let you know that you're the reason I'm on Steemit! I bought your $15 course off a link from popular mechanics! So here I am! Also voted you up on witness! Good luck and Safe Travels Jerry!
Well Jerry there are certain taboos in different cultures, and while something might feel right to some culture would feel wrong to some other. Same reasoning applies to religion, even legislation as you pointed out in one state.
My take on the topic, and in life in general, is to respect other people's opinions, beliefs, as long as they don't cause harm to others.
Hiding oneself 's private parts (or any part depending on culture, religion,...) is a personal choice based upon his conviction, which is part of the freedom I believe every human should posses.
Thanks for posting on such a delicate topic, in such a fun way
Nice post @jerry thanks resteem
Interesting post... @jerrybanfield you are awesome man...
thank you for sharing your friend's information.
Hehe ,this is funniest post which I saw from you :)I like to show my body because I want be popular and I am proud my body.
Hey @jerrybanfield, wonderful post as usual. Life is like a wave of thoughts, it's all about perspective. How we think becomes our reality.
Awesome Six Pack Jerry!
Everyone has the right to live their lives as per their definitions as far as their actions don't hurt others. Steemit has different categories and this platform is changing lives. So, keep posting guys and let's make Steemit a BIG success! Keep posting @jerrybanfield. Good luck to your wife with her Steemit career.
STEEM ON!
@jerrybanfield 💖 Awesome Upvoted
Nice one
human rights must be same for male as well as for women, both are equal . and we have freedom to live our own life according to our perspective
thanks for sharing such useful post, following you
Is this @jerrybanfield trying to politely ask for nudes?
ahahah good one, yeah maybe
Why do you think anyone needs to see a picture of you in your underwear grow the fuck up
Another great post. I really like your style @jerrybanfield you always speak the truth and reality and what you are feeling and you are not afraid to share it with us which is very cool and very appreciated because I want to follow people who are real and honest, and that is why I've been following you since day one on Steemit, and you are one of my most influential steemer. Upvoted like always and voted. Thanks. Love it
life is about freedom of expression and finding your own path
Thanks, jerry, the internet mostly consist of photo either SUPERmodels or SUPER fat people. Where is average? Those who have - hiding, because it's not sexy. What will you do next? You show people everything. For me, you are INTERNET MONEY MAKER. You've mad courses, Fiverr gigs, investing ... and now you turn this picture around, you are becoming, for me, real person.
Travel-size... absolutely hilarious. Great video.
Good article. Thank you Jerry.
@jerrybanfield really i like your post and you are my favorite Steemian !
Like you said, many cultures have different opinions about showing the body or not. I grew up in Germany and we all used the bathroom at the same time - one on the toilet, one washing up or brushing teeth. That is what happens when you have one bathroom and seven people in the family.
A body was a body. Everybody in a sauna was naked and there was a mix of sexes and ages. Same true for going to the beach or the pool. For example, people wear a swimming suit. But if they want to change from a wet one to a dry one, they take off the wet one, dry themselves, and put on the other one. right in the middle of the crowd, so to speak.
But in the US,it is a different story. Naked body = sex here. It is used a lot. Think of all the ads with barely dressed women and - you name it - a burger, car, motorcycle. Heck, even laundry soap sells better with a half-naked woman attached.
Oh, and breasts!!! Let's shame people when breastfeeding in public! Obviously, breasts were made to be used in ads and fantasies.
Yes, so sad.
That said, starting to put naked pics on social media might not be the answer. Getting in touch with our bodies, on the other hand, is. WE can be strong and proud of what we have - no matter how old - or ugly (there are no ugly bodies btw.)as you put it- no matter if we are naked or clothed.
That is what matters. Not what others are thinking.
your thoughts are really meticulous, you say to always close the point of the genitals, because it is the point of sex or dignity that we must guard. I agree with you.
every person must have a passion to see something that he likes, but sometimes it is too much.
You also tell me about your experience when you see your mother again naked there, but you deeply regret it, I think that's the right action, we can not see naked people, but if things do not we deliberately, I think no problem.
your story is great for today, I really like, thank you for sharing the story!
one request please read this post .
Hello my friend great article...I can take away and say I have learned something
Wow I cant believe how good this article is. I love it.
First, I love this. It covers so many important topics.
As a mother of boys, I appreciate your attention to this infuriating issue of men being seen as sex crazed maniacs.
As a mother of girls, I want them to be free to show whatever they do or don't want to show without fear.
As a mother who has nursed four beautiful babies, I wish people would stop harassing women for feeding their babies.
As a woman who has carried, birthed, and fed four kids with a body that reflects that, I've come a long way in loving this body as it is, grateful for the magical things it has done. Living in Belize where all body types are loved and appreciated has helped a lot.
As a survivor of sexual assault, I'm a ways from being comfortable to post pics of my body on social media. There's a lot of good men. I've raised one (with another still raising). There's also a lot of horrid ones. There are horrid women too, but most of them don't threaten my bodily autonomy. Maybe it's weird to care what someone does with an image of my body, but it still feels violatey to think of someone seeing it as anything other than a beautiful creation.
Thanks. It's a good start to some necessary conversations.
thanks for sharing @jerrybanfield , quite interesting , but i think the trend at which fashion is going , with time people will go naked in the name of fashion
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good Earnings @jerrybanfield
Just opening up to someone makes us vulnerable. Anyway, it's always great to read your posts. Thank you for sharing your thoughts :)
US got the KKK, Germany got FKK 😉
Congratulations @jerrybanfield!
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Hi Jerry,
I love this topic! the subject "matter". I am a 50 year old woman who has worked on my body because it is an expression of the beauty that I am which comes from within.
Take a look at my blog photo. What you have brilliantly captured here is precisely the reason I posted the picture that I did.
I am one of those who "share", because it is an expression of how comfortable I am with myself and others it conveys openness and being approachable.
I am of Caribbean decent and just most comfortable this way. I know who I am, a connector and unconditionally loving human being. Thank you for delving into this subject this way. I visit your page to hear about crypto currency. The resonance with this subject is quite a pleasant surprise. With appreciation @JerryBanfield
Hugs and Love,
Jeanine