People that play the role of the victim and all the other mind games are just using techniques they found that work – at least in their minds. We can’t tell them when they are wrong or being irrational because they will perceive it as a threat. They often act as if they are never wrong so they can forgo the embarrassment or even guilt of having to admit they were wrong. And if they happen to be family members we often have no other choice but to do the next best thing and placate them. It becomes a vicious cycle and we are the enablers.
Another aspect of “emotional immaturity” comes from deep-seated insecurity. People that lash out at others are usually covering up their own lack of ability. Ever notice that the biggest critics often have no talent themselves? They pretend to know all about a subject by criticizing it to no end but they would be hard pressed to provide a real workable solution themselves. It’s the persistent fear of being exposed as a fraud that produces a lot of the bad behavior you describe.
Right on.