Title - Orono man gets 5 days jail time for stuff behind his garage.

A short story by professor poppycock

Chapter one – Hello Kitty

I never would of thought anyone in a million years could ever be sentenced to jail for 5 days because they stored ladders, firewood and some harmless homeowner stuff behind their garage, that's tucked back in the woods so far you would need a search party to find.

Well wrong again, seems to be a pattern lately in the world today, and most recently in Orono, Minnesota "ya don’t u know." Apparently in Orono they don't like that kind of stuff, and will go out of their way to prosecute these kind of unruly, home owning, taxpaying, worker bees and die hard Viking fans with stuff behind their garages.

So, some three years ago some nice Orono city employee comes snooping around, pulls right into the driveway with one of those fancy luxury suv and starts taking pictures of stuff behind said tucked back in the woods garage.
Not knowing what she might find and taking great caution as not to alert any wildlife that could alert anyone of her position, successful in her photo journalism project she rush of to the Orono gang hideout to document the outrageous items that must be illegal for anyone to obtain , let’s see , … wait for it ..a 10 year old bicycle, unprofessionally leaning up against a wall, a scary spare tire, and some not so in fashion assorted home remodeling plumbing items, who knew puke green was just a fade.

Excited with her find, she painstaking scoured through endless volumes of city code books. Wait , she paused .. what am I doing, is this what i want to do with the rest of my life, how is this bettering my fellow man, are my intention noble, are my action for a greater good or am I just a mindless drone programed by an authoritarian educational system that does not want me to think for myself. What the heck just happened, destroy these object collectors and shall my wrath be inhumane, unjustified and painfully corrupt to the untrained eyes of most and yet give my socialist coconspirators that warm fuzzy feeling around the water cooler at feeding time.

Fresh from a night of bloodletting puppies, city inspector planner esquire wonder girl had a new bounce in her slightly squishy from puppy blood black pumps... Time to bring my irrefutable nonsensical photos and cumbersome code violation to the higher ups, surely they will understand my willingness to violate any ethical human traits and praise me for understanding the ways they themselves came up the ranks of corruption... Dam I’m good. Maybe they will let me get that hello kitty phone in my slave cubical.