¡Hola hermosa comunidad que me encanta! Siempre esperando que se encuentren muy bien ❤. En mi aportación del día de hoy a esta comunidad, quiero compartirles una historia de una mujer que ha ido por la vida fijándose en patrones físicos para poder permitirse sentir algo por otra persona: mi madre. Este tema llega luego de una charla tomando un rico café en mi casa, siempre surgen estos temas tan íntimos, por suerte la relación que tengo con mi madre ha sido tan cercana que estos temas, incluso los de sexo, son abiertamente puestos sobre la mesa sin ningún tabú.
Hello beautiful community that I love! Always hoping you are doing great ❤. In my contribution today to this community, I want to share with you a story of a woman who has gone through life fixating on physical patterns in order to allow herself to feel something for someone else: my mother. This topic comes after a chat over a nice coffee at my house, these very intimate topics always come up, luckily the relationship I have with my mother has been so close that these topics, even those of sex, are openly put on the table without any taboo.
Mi madre ha sido una persona sin suerte en el amor. No es porque ella no ha querido serlo, simplemente no se lo permite; ¿Por qué? Ella tiene un patrón físico determinado para sus parejas. Cosa que ha sido la causa de sus fracasos sentimentales, ella abiertamente lo admite. Esa tarde durante el café, ella me admitió algo que, no fue compatible con mi manera de pensar, igual se lo respeté escuchándola amablemente: "Yo tengo un tipo de hombre; debe ser blanco, primeramente, alto, muy alto, si tiene 2 metros mejor, deben ser atractivos, no tan gordos pero tampoco muy flacos, si no son así, prefiero quedarme así, sola para siempre". Estas fueron las palabras de mi madre. Así ha sido su vida, llena de soledad, querer estar con alguien sólo porque cumple con el físico de tu preferencia no quiere decir que triunfarás en el amor. Ella es prueba de eso. ¿De que vale?
My mother has been unlucky in love. It's not because she hasn't wanted to be, she just won't let herself be; why? She has a certain physical pattern for her partners. Something that has been the cause of her romantic failures, she openly admits. That afternoon over coffee, she admitted to me something that was not compatible with my way of thinking, but I still respected it, listening to her kindly: "I have a type of man; he must be white, first of all, tall, very tall, if he is 2 meters tall, better, they must be attractive, not too fat but not too skinny either, if they are not like that, I prefer to stay like that, alone forever". These were my mother's words. That's how her life has been, full of loneliness, wanting to be with someone just because he/she has the physique of your preference does not mean that you will succeed in love. She is proof of that. What's the point?
Mi padre
My father
Desde pequeña, ella ha tenido este patrón para los hombres por razones que yo desconozco, ella me cuenta que quizás se dejó influenciar por las novelas y revistas de su época. Al llegar a los 18 años, aun no había tenido su primer novio esperando uno que cumpliera con las características requeridas. Mi madre conoció a mi padre durante unas vacaciones, él se encontraba cerca de casa de mi madre, empezaron a frecuentarse. Apenas siendo unos jóvenes, se enamoraron. Ella no lo pensó mucho, decidió irse con el a su ciudad, teniendo sólo 18 años sin experiencia, hizo lo que haría un corazón enamorado; escaparse del yugo de su familia para estar con ese hombre del que se había perdidamente enamorado. Al principio todo era hermoso, como un cuento de hadas, vivían en casa de los padres de él; 2 jóvenes empezando a vivir. No pasó mucho tiempo cuando se dio cuenta que la apariencia no lo era todo en la vida; él era un alcohólico, mujeriego, irresponsable y mala pareja. Se dio cuenta tarde, cuando estaba esperando su segundo embarazo y yo tenía sólo 4 años. Fue un fracaso del que no pudo recuperarse tan pronto, quedó sola viéndose en la obligación de volver a su ciudad, a su hogar junto con sus padres.
Since she was a child, she has had this pattern for men for reasons unknown to me, she tells me that perhaps she was influenced by the novels and magazines of her time. When she was 18, she had not yet had her first boyfriend and was waiting for one who met the required characteristics. My mother met my father during a vacation, he was near my mother's house, they began to frequent each other. When they were just young, they fell in love. She didn't think much about it, she decided to go with him to his city, being only 18 years old with no experience, she did what a heart in love would do; escape from the yoke of her family to be with the man she had fallen madly in love with. At first everything was beautiful, like a fairy tale, they lived in his parents' house; 2 young people just starting to live. It wasn't long before she realized that appearance wasn't everything in life; he was an alcoholic, womanizer, irresponsible and a bad partner. She realized it late, when she was expecting her second pregnancy and I was only 4 years old. It was a failure from which she could not recover so soon, she was left alone and had to return to her city, to her home with her parents.
Mi padrastro
My step-father
Pasaron 5 años para poder recuperarse de aquel fracaso, mi padre se volvió ausente de todas las maneras posibles, incluso, monetariamente de sus hijas. Esto le daba fuerzas a mi madre para tener la determinación de no querer rehacer su vida. Cuando yo tenía 9 años de edad, conoció al que llegó a ser mi padrastro. Ese hombre cumplía con el patrón que tanto buscaba, al verlo ya se sentía "enamorada" (palabras dichas por ella misma para que la narración de este post). Comenzaron una relación; salían, se iban de viaje, iban de compras, él la visitaba todos los días. Se sentía tan bien al estar con el, que el le confesó que estaba casado y tenia 2 hijas, esto pareció no importarle en lo más mínimo. Ella siguió con el omitiendo esa información tan importante. Luego de 4 años de relación, mi madre queda embarazada de mi hermano menor. El le dio una casa propia por la llegada del bebé; jamás vivieron juntos, el se marcho a otra ciudad a trabajar. Pasó sólo 1 año cuando el decide terminar con mi madre porque le confiesa que esta viviendo con otra mujer en la ciudad donde se encontraba trabajando; mi madre quedo tan devastada, que han pasado 14 años desde entonces y sigue estando sola. Ni siquiera es por el hecho de no tener pretendientes, sólo que ellos no cumplen con el físico de su agrado. Le dije que no se podía ser tan superficial, que eso no lo era todo, me dijo abiertamente: "Entonces me quedo sola, esa es la solución".
It took 5 years to recover from that failure, my father became absent in every possible way, including financially from his daughters. This gave my mother the strength to have the determination to not want to rebuild her life. When I was 9 years old, she met the man who became my stepfather. That man fulfilled the pattern she was looking for so much, when she saw him she already felt "in love" (words said by herself for the narration of this post). They started a relationship; they went out, they went on trips, they went shopping, he visited her every day. It felt so good to be with him, that he confessed to her that he was married and had 2 daughters, this did not seem to bother her in the least. She continued with him omitting this important information. After 4 years of relationship, my mother became pregnant by my younger brother. He gave her a house of her own for the baby's arrival; they never lived together, he moved to another city to work. It was only 1 year later when he decided to break up with my mother because he confessed to her that he was living with another woman in the city where he was working; my mother was so devastated that 14 years have passed since then and she is still alone. It's not even because she doesn't have any suitors, it's just that they don't meet her physical requirements. I told her that she couldn't be so superficial, that that wasn't everything, she told me openly: "Then I'll stay alone, that's the solution".
Esta historia es la prueba de que amoldar nuestros sentimientos a patrones físicos es la formula perfecta para ir directo al fracaso amoroso. Hay cosas muchísimos más importantes que deben ser tomadas en cuenta para que una relación sea sana, feliz y duradera. Como cada cabeza es un mundo con sus propios satélites, respeto su manera de ver el amor. Hay algo de lo que yo estaré segura, el amor es algo que se siente con el alma, con el cuerpo, con el corazón, se ve reflejado en los actos del día a día, cuando abras los ojos, sin importar su físico, esa persona será perfecta para ti.
This story is proof that molding our feelings to physical patterns is the perfect formula for love failure. There are much more important things that must be taken into account for a relationship to be healthy, happy and lasting. As each head is a world with its own satellites, I respect your way of looking at love. There is one thing I will be sure of, love is something you feel with your soul, with your body, with your heart, it is reflected in your daily actions, when you open your eyes, regardless of their physique, that person will be perfect for you.
Si llegaste hasta aquí ¡Muchísimas gracias por leerme!
Las imágenes son de mi autoria. Algunas tomadas de mis redes sociales y mi archivo de whatsapp.
The images are my own. Some taken from my social networks and my whatsapp archive.
El texto es 100% escrito por mi. La historia es real, narro un poco lo que ha sido la vida amorosa de mi madre.
The text is 100% written by me. The story is real, I narrate a little of my mother's love life.
Para la traduccion usé DeepL
For the translation I used the translator DeepL
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The story of your mother's life has driven me out of grief. I have read the story written by you completely well. I blame a man and a man because there are some people in the world who can't imagine anything but their own needs and interests.