The Ties That Bind

in Silver Bloggers4 days ago

Is it possible to turn the clock back? It turned back in my neighborhood a few days ago, on Halloween night. Or at least that's the way it seemed. I felt as though I was in Mayberry, circa 1955. My community became the quintessential small town, with people sitting on their front steps and greeting passersby. Others were walking through the streets, with or without children. Many wore costumes.

My daughter met more neighbors on Halloween night than she has met in the year we've lived in this community. I watched, and let her do the socializing.

Halloween actually began in this community more than a month ago. That's when I noticed people starting to put up Halloween decorations. I'd never seen so many decorations for this holiday in my life.

There were witch covens--several, on different lawns, in front of different homes. There was a larger-than-life skeletal dog that barked and growled when I passed by. There was twelve-foot werewolf, with a torn shirt, and glowing eyes that blinked.

One house had the entire yard covered in animated glowing, blow-up characters. The picture below was taken early in October.

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As the days passed, the home owner kept adding to the display. By Halloween night, the blow-up characters extended to the edge of the yard. There were even sound effects.

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My family was ready for Halloween, we felt, though we didn't have the theatrical aspirations manifested by many of our neighbors. My daughter decorated the house, mostly with items she had saved from years before, and from a few inexpensive accents purchased this year. Here's how the front window looked.

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She fashioned the character from stuffing (an old U-Haul drop cloth), a well-worn shirt, and pants.

She decorated the shrubs in front of the house. Here you can see a skull, a crossbone, and skeleton arms extending from the branches.

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She even fashioned a ghoul to haunt the front yard. This she made from an old Halloween costume, which she draped over a small tree.

halloween ghoul.png

We had candy piled into colorful platters. Here is a picture of one platter after goblins had visited and filled their treat bags.

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My daughter dressed the dog in bat wings.

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And put on a modified version of the costume she'd worn to work that day (she works in a school where everyone wore costumes).

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She sat in a chair on the yard with bat dog, and waited for trick-or-treating goblins.

It was quite an afternoon. Everyone was in a festive mood. People stopped and introduced themselves. I was upstairs and could hear them in the street.

Sometime after seven my daughter and the dog came in. We left the candy out, but took it in a little after eight. We had no concern there would be mischief.

That night we walked around the neighborhood. People were going from house to house, socializing. Backyard parties were in evidence. If anyone passed us on the street, we'd get a friendly, "Hello". Neighbors were sitting on their porches.

There were also skeletons on the porches :) Some of them had skeleton dogs with them, as this one did.

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It felt almost as though I was in a TV sitcom. Everyone seemed to be in a good mood. I finally understood what all the Halloween decorations were about. The community was getting ready for a holiday, for a celebration of shared culture.

Most days, I walk around my neighborhood at least a couple of times. I do it for exercise, and also to walk the dog when my daughter is at work (it's her dog). A little while back I started noticing political signs going up on lawns and porches.

One house on my block has a huge Trump flag where there used to be an American flag. In the back window of that neighbor's car is a decal that says, Kamala, you're fired!

Almost directly across the street from that home is a house with a large Harris Waltz sign. Other signs this house displays read, We're not going back, and Women for Harris.

This country, my country, is poised for conflict. We are divided. Passions run high. Oh wow did we need Halloween.

Nobody cares who you're voting for, or what your political beliefs are on Halloween night. We don costumes, walk around the neighborhood and keep an eye out for the children who are trick or treating.

Another collection of Halloween blow-up figures.
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The much-contested election is just days away. And yet, everyone came together on Halloween night.

That is the function of ritual, of custom. These are the ties that bind. We can disagree about so much. We can be different. Have different religions. Different political views. We can have vastly different incomes. Some of our homes are grand, and some are quite small, and old. But on this one night, when ghouls and goblins are invited to stroll the streets, a spell is cast. It is a spell that says we are a community. We care about each other. Differences may distinguish us, but they don't separate us.




Before I end this blog I should make clear that I'm not what is called a 'social' person. I won't be having my neighbors to tea, and I won't be sitting on their porches. But I hope to bake the nearest neighbors cookies, and hand these out in fancy tins at Christmas.

I like my front door. I like the fact that it closes and locks. But if my neighbor's car won't start, or a dog gets lost, or the neighbor seems to need help of any kind, I'll be there.

A friendly, "Hello". A shared sense of good will. That's what community is to me, and I think after Halloween night I'm well on my way to having that.

alpy in doorway.png

Thank you for reading my blog. Peace and health to all my readers. Hive on!



***All pictures in this post were taken by me📸

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This post made me cry, @agmoore. But everything about togetherness and kindness makes me cry lately. I'm tired of outrage and anger. I want our country to heal and our people to come together.

I heard the most amazing program on This American Life yesterday. It was about a couple who had married a little later in life (second marriages for them both). She was a Democrat and he was a Republican. In the early days it didn't matter. But once Trumpism came on the scene, the divisions between them in what they believed and what kind of news they trusted came into focus. Their marriage began to suffer. Neither would listen to the other when it came to politics, freedoms, beliefs... etc.

They vowed to find a news source that was impartial and unbiased in its reporting. Seems impossible, right? Well, it turns out it's quite possible, and a guy by the name of Isaac Saul has achieved it. He created Tangle, a "non-partisan politics newsletter that gives you a 360-degree view on the news. No spin. No clickbait. Opinions from the left, right, and center so you can decide." I was amazed to hear about this incredible project. The readership is divided in thirds — left, right, and independent.

The couple mended their relationship. The husband, who was absolutely certain the 2020 election was stolen, read the deep-dive into the facts that Tangle provided and came to the conclusion that it was not. Biden legitimately won the election. Now, whenever there is an incendiary topic like that, they look for true story on Tangle.

Well, your story is about Halloween! But I love how it serves as a symbol of how people can come together for a fun and spooky and genuinely non-divisive celebration, and just enjoy being out and about, and being neighbors.

 4 days ago  

♥️

These are hard times. I don't know if my husband and I would get along if we didn't agree on this. I'd wonder about his values, if he could approve of that man. But we have to get along, and realize people on the other side can't imagine why we believe what we do.

Thank you very much for the Tangle reference. I'm going to check it out right away.

As for my neighbor with the big Trump flag in front of his house. I was shocked, but then realized he must have his reasons. And he must think they are valid.

You're correct about the blog--it's not really about Halloween. It's about people coming together and looking past their differences. What great feeling that was.

Disclaimer: I live in Houston, TX. I have voted for Harris already.

I have been listening the Ira and This American Life for 10 + years. I consider Ira part of my life. Brian Reed who produced this show is a big shot. I first started paying attention to him at S-town Podcast, which was an amazing show. I have listened to the same show, you mentioned. I was wondering...

I am 48. My wife is 50. We are college class mates. Thank heavens we met early on in life, much before politics became this toxic. I am thankful we have the same political view, because if we didn't, and knowing how militant she is (god bless her!, I don't believe in god); I don't think we had any chance of being together. We dodged a bullet. Our two daughters dodged a bullet.

On the same note I am going to reach out to J D Vance (yes, him!), he recently said:

“If you’re discarding a lifelong friendship because somebody votes for the other team, then you’ve made a terrible, terrible mistake and you should do something different,”

Kudos to JD for this! I have hope in humanity.

Also if you read his book he said a lot of the things regardning why we are here:

“What separates the successful from the unsuccessful are the expectations that they had for their own lives. Yet the message of the right is increasingly: It’s not your fault that you’re a loser; it’s the government’s fault.”

from...J.D. Vance, Hillbilly Elegy: A Memoir of a Family and Culture in Crisis

I have no idea what will happen on Tuesday. I don't do prediction. However, today, I have been reading about J D Vance; believe it or not!

I like this quote from him!

"Mr. Trump is unfit for our nation's highest office."

J. D. Vance

https://www.nytimes.com/2016/04/04/opinion/campaign-stops/why-trumps-antiwar-message-resonates-with-white-america.html

 3 days ago  

That is a fascinating article. Vance is very astute. Very smart and calculating. I looked up his statement about casualties in the Iraq War. He's right. They were disproportionately white. That he would know this is pretty impressive. He's got his facts straight.

He 'sees' Trump. He understands the political appeal. And knows absolutely that Trump is unfit. Vance says the dumbest things, and he is not a dumb man. He will be one step away from the presidency, if Trump should win, and Trump is an overweight 78-year-old man. Scary on all counts.

Yes. And not just that. He is 40 years old. He can potentially have a full political career ahead of him. Trump is doing his very best to destroy the GOP, with Vance they might have a hope in future.

His wife is Indian. A telegu. Comes from a whole family of academics. They were class mates in law school. Certainly she is not a lady to marry a stupid man. I am Indian, and no modern educated Indian young lady will do such a thing. So bottom line the speeches JD is giving now is not the line he will walk in future. He is too smart for that. He is taking a bet on himself for the reason you mentioned. Next in line alongside a 78 year old lunatic who can be manipulated.

Holliday and festivities bring people together in your community. Something to look forward to on Christmas.

 4 days ago  

Something to look forward to on Christmas

Yes, you're right! It was fun and for a few moments we could forget about all that other stuff that isn't so nice.

Thanks for stopping by, @asiaymalay

There’s so much tongue-in-cheek fun in those decorations that it has to make your heart light. I love that you can walk around in your neighbourhood in the evening, because that’s a luxury afforded by living in a first-world (safe) country (if we did that here we’d be mugged). The entire experience sounds wonderfully joyful.

 4 days ago  

Walking around in the evening is not something I used to do comfortably in my old neighborhood. Even now my family won't let me do it alone if it's not daylight. They think I look vulnerable, but I pity the fool who tries to pick a fight with me😅. At night I always walk with my daughter and my dog.

It is joyful. This seems to be nice place to grow older.

Thank you my friend, @itsostylish for stopping by and reading.

Cookies? Homemade cookies? I love cookies. Do you post to neighbours further afield by any chance?

I'm about as social as yourself. A big smile, a short conversation and I'm on my way, but I'll always lend a hand if needed. That is community to me and it looks like you found yourself a good one.

 4 days ago  

Do you post to neighbours further afield by any chance?

😅

It's been years, but I used to make a mean cookie.

I did find myself a good community. We thought we might have overpaid for the house--we were so tired of looking and not finding anything suitable. Now we truly see that we bought a home, not just a house, and that has value.

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 4 days ago  

Thank you very much, the Inkwell🌷

!LOLZ

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All that time and nothing to chauffeur it.

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@agmoore, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of vaynard.fun

(5/8)

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