Seeing as there is no blatant incest going on, I think it's pretty sweet that you and your husband found each other, and were, quite literally, attracted to something familiar in one another. If I'm understanding the genealogy correctly, it's almost as though you get to make up for that connection you never got to piece together with your totally checked out biological father.
Also thinking, maybe it hurts terribly for the bio-dad to even think about having a daughter whose life he has completely missed, so he doesn't even want to go there. His complete refusal for a connection is about him, not you.
I keep forgetting that, btw. That his refusal is about him, not me. Thank you for the reminder.
I'm going to put it on a post it where I can continue to remember that. It's often the simplest of things even professionals like me are remiss, from time to time, in applying to ourselves.
Glad to provide the outside perspective/reminder! If we could get it all right all on our own all the time we wouldn't need anyone else and life would plain suck. I'm still learning and re-learning this every day. Thanks for reminding me, lol.