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RE: The Job of Living

in Silver Bloggers3 years ago

I'm sorry, Lizelle. Supporting your parents in this stage of life is so hard sometimes. Seeing everything my Dad had to go through with battle with Alzheimer's then passing from Covid a little over a year ago made me think hard about the end stages of life and how fragile it all is more than I ever have before. Most days I still can't believe he's gone but I go about my business just fine but some days are darker and just really hard. I start thinking about all the times I missed with him since we lived so far away.

I love that quote you've posted, "Whether we think you can or you can't -- either way you're right." That is so true. We must "keep on keeping on" no matter what. During the dark days I go seeking for a glimmer of light. Your Mom is so lucky to have such a great daughter to take care of her.

I see my Mom getting less mobile and more fearful now too, almost like she's retreating into a shell. We invited her to spend time with us in Sedona but she won't come due to her fear of flying. I don't always understand her decisions or thought process but I try because I don't want to impose anything on her that she doesn't want to do. Her freedom of choice is about all she has left but I feel time slipping away and I just want to spend all the quality time with her that I can.

Keep your head up as best you can, I will do the same. Good night my friend!

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 3 years ago  

Thank you my friend, it's been a harrowing time! Yesterday and last night seemed to be the worst, I was ready to throw in the towel and accept my brother's offer of a day nurse, but Mom will hate it as she already feels she's lost her dignity with hubby having to help with lifting her as I cannot do it, she's tiny, but a dead weight! This morning there's an improvement in that she's able to take in liquids without spilling and choking too much and is trying to use her one good leg (her right side is almost paralyzed from the tumour). The inflammation around it must be subsiding.
I was thinking of your Dad when my nephew told me they want to discharge her from hospital asap as there are too many bugs in hospitals and she would be vulnerable.
Thank heavens we all got Omicron and not one of the previous nasty variants of the Coronavirus!
When Mom's brother in law recently passed away after a bad fall, I was so sad but Mom quietly reminded me that we'll all walk that path one day. The circle of life not so!
It's such a pity that your Mom is afraid of flying, but like you say, we need to respect their wishes even if it doesn't make any sense to us!
They can get so stubborn at times! I wanted to treat Mom for Christmas by taking her on a golf cart tour of the Botanic Gardens but she point-blank refused!
You're so right, we need to keep on keeping!
Hope your wife is much better and that this is going to be a better year. Somebody once said when you've fallen down, there's only one way, and that's to get up and keep on going.

I'm sorry to hear about your struggles, Lizelle, but I'm glad things are improving with your Mom! Unfortunately there's no other way to get my Mom to Arizona except by air so that'll mean she won't be joining us. They can be SO stubborn. I guess this is the universe's payback for what our parents put up with from us during our teenage years. ; ) My wife is still having good days and bad days but we're trying to make the most of the good days, that's really all you can do. I hope you have a wonderful week!