Hello and blessings to all.
2023 has not been a good year for me. Coming on the heels of my sister Dorothy's passing in February, I find myself weeping once again for the loss of my oldest brother, Michael.
He passed away a few days ago, just one month after his 72nd birthday. I am heartbroken.
I find myself walking around in kind of a haze, with tears and joy as I remember my dear brother Mike. He was always so protective of me, always including me when we played basketball or flag football with all the neighborhood kids. He would warn the other boys to go easy on me, I happened to be the only girl playing. At that time, there were no other girls my age who wanted to play, but I loved all these games because my brother knew it meant a lot to me to be with him. I always looked up to him, he was my pal.
Although there would be five other siblings to follow us, I was the youngest for the longest, it would be four years before my sister Crissy was born.
I was the little princess.
The years flew by, as all of us #silverbloggers know, but so much life will be remembered. A good life, with sweet memories.
Like most families, we shared birthdays, Christmas holidays, graduations, weddings, and new babies. We also had our share of pain.
In October 1994, Mike was out in the woods hunting alone, he knew he shouldn't go out alone, but he was an outdoorsman who loved nature, and he had been hunting since he was 16 years old, he had plenty of experience. His plan was to just go out for an hour or so after work that day.
It was around 4 pm, out into the woods Mike went with his bow, off to find the tree stand he and our other brother built. In short order, the tree stand was located, and Michael climbed up without a problem. But as he was settling in a weakened plank gave way and he was hurled to the ground landing him upside down with arms outstretched.
Amazingly, he never lost consciousness. But both arms were shattered, and his neck hurt, his bow was still strapped to his back, and as he lay on top of it, his neck pain increased, and he found he just couldn't move. He couldn't get the bugs out of his eyes or the raccoon off his chest, he had to just lay there waiting for the creatures to move on, scary shit stuff.
It would be another eight hours until he was found. His wife was working late at the hospital, and she was the only one who knew he was going hunting. She didn't know he never made it out of the woods until she got home after midnight.
As panic set in, family phones started ringing, Mike was missing. It took some time to get the police and the family out searching but it was less than two hours to get him out. The paramedics were top-notch, the chopper was on its way to take our brother to the trauma center.
Much worse than we had hoped.
Our entire family waited hours, helping each other to stay calm and positive, but when the trauma team came to speak to us, we listened to every word.
Mike was paralyzed from the neck down. We were crushed, the cries and gasps flew through the waiting room.
We still had hope, the surgeon explained that he had not severed his spinal cord, but compressed it making it swell, hence the paralyses. His arms would need surgery, but he would regain the use of his arms, if and when the swelling in the spinal cord receded.
It took eleven months for us to see his one big toe move. We jumped for joy!
After another year of living at a rehab center, Mike took his first step.
Talk about true grit.
My brother worked so hard during the years that followed his accident, he was able to walk, not perfectly but he still got around. His arms were another story. The combination of the cord swelling, and the multiple fractures had left him unable to bring his hand to his mouth, hence, he had to bull through learning how to feed himself, dress himself, you get the picture.
He did it.
Hours and hours of rehab and another year gone by, my amazing, strong brother was able to eat all by himself, always joking about how he needed a bib and that his methods may not be pretty, but it gets the job done.
He was only forty-three years old. With both his children in college, life would become
financially challenging. But he nor his lovely wife ever complained about it, life was the most important thing to them.
SO VERY HAPPY.
A huge highlight in my life was my daughter's wedding, simply said pure joy.
Want to guess who said..." I wouldn't miss it for the world", you guessed it, Brother Mike and Kathy would be there to share our happiness. It was awesome.
I will never forget my brother; he was such a big part of my life.
May you rest in peace, and Bro, keep an eye on us, we all can use a bit of your strength, faith, and love now and again.
Much love,
Jackie O
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I am sorry you’ve lost your big brother. He sounds like such a kind person. That accident was horrific, lying in the woods all that time. I’m glad he was able to regain the use of arms and legs.
You've had a rough year for sure, and my heart and thoughts go out to you.
Good morning @goldenoakfarm, we just got back late yesterday from Jersey, we had a funeral mass then a luncheon for my brother Mike it was bittersweet. We were sad then happy, regaling his life.
It was his time to go, he suffered long enough and now he's at peace. As always, my friend, thanks for your kindness and support through this sad and painful time.
Be well my dear friend.
It’s good when it turns happy and the stories roll in. For my husband I set out nice journal books and people wrote stories in them. I keep them near where I sit and write more stories in if I can remember them.
Thoughts are with you and the family, our siblings leave a massive chasm in our hearts, always there for each other.
Knowing each other through so many special times spent together, life is not easy when we say goodbye. !LUV
Good day my friend, @joanstewart, I really appreciate your kindness and understanding. Friends and family are what gets us through these sad and difficult times.
Be well.
Take care with lots of love.
!LUV
Oh wow I can't imagine what you are going through. Even thinking about one of my brothers leaving makes my heart ache.
This tribute would make him proud and our world is better for your relationship.
Condolences. :(
Good morning @zekepickleman, thanks for your kind words. Losing a loved is always so painful, when you hear those words, your brother has passed away, it hits hard. Even though in the big picture, he suffered enough, and it was time for peace.
Now I have another angel looking over me.
Awe no Robin, I only now read about your very sad news, am crying with you my friend. How tragic that both your siblings had accidents that affected the rest of their lives!
I am so very sorry about the loss of your brother.
Life can be so wonderfil but at times, it really sucks, to put it bluntly!
That is a beautiful photo of the 3 of you. My heart cries with you my friend💔🙏🏻
Hey @lizelle, just got back home from New Jersey, we were down for three days to mourn my brother's passing as well as celebrate life. All kinds of emotions were flying, but when you have a family to support you it makes the world of difference.
Thanks so much my dear friend, I feel you.
I can remember the day of his accident like it was yesterday. He was a fighter like no one other person I have ever known. This tragedy would have left most others not only paralyzed in body but also with a paralyzed will to live, not Mike.
As is always your way, for the first couple of years following his injury you put yourself out there on the front line once again. I'm not sure how you do what you do for so many others. After his release from the Kessler Institute, you were his personal chauffeur, driving him to the rehab center three days a week for over a year. Not only did you step up to the plate, but you were always concerned about cheating our family of your time. We all knew that you would not have it any other way. As I have said so many times, I would choose you above anyone to be with me in a foxhole.
Your passion for those you love is beyond my ability to put into words.
May you rest in peace Michael as you join your sister Dorothy in the heavens above.
I love you; we are so blessed to have each other. I think of you as my rock and myself as the pillow, what a wonderful combo. Thank you for always being there for our family.
My heart aches knowing the overwhelming sadness you are feeling. Hope that knowing Mike is with Dorothy now gives you some comfort and solace.
Rest in peace, Mike!🙏
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Hey Nina, great to hear from you, thanks for your kindness and sympathy. I know you also have had some terrible losses in your life, yet you remain strong and positive, you inspire me, you are one strong lady.
Be well my dear friend and have a blessed day.
Please accept my deepest condolences. I have not experienced losing a sibling yet but neither have I one who was as strong and determined as Mike. His is the stuff that legends are made of. You must be really proud of him. I would be too. My prayers for his eternal rest and peace, wherever that place is where legends go after this life 🙏🙏🙏
Hello Ruel, thanks so much for your kindness and sympathy.
My brother was such a big part of my life, and I am going to miss him very much.
Mike was so strong, never giving up, always looking at the bright side of life. I truly admired his grit.
I appreciate your prayers and your reference to him being a legend, in my mind he truly is one.
I am so sorry for your loss. It is really hard losing a sibling.
Your brother had such a warrior spirit. Thank you for sharing a part of his life with us. Xxx
"Warrior spirit" great name for my brother. He was such a fighter, he had a good life, and he was loved by so many.
He will always be in my heart.
Thanks so much for your kind words, I feel the love.
So sad, and I read this story twice to Marian, as we still feel the hurt of my last sister passing away a few days after her 70th birthday last year. It hurts like nothing else can and our prayers are with you during this period Lady Robin. All peace and love to you.
!PIZZA and !LUV
Hello there old friend. Losing our loved ones is so painful, it really hurts, and it shocks our system. But I know my beautiful brother is at peace now, no more pain or sorrow.
It was Mike's time, he fought the good fight, and he will be missed.
At our age, we must remain stronger than ever because we know that not one of us can skirt death. It's the memories of a good life, well lived with love and joy that will remain.
Have a blessed and beautiful day.
Warm greetings to you Lady Robin.
You are so right and the shock and hurt is always so sudden. Mike is indeed in a much better place, and he certainly deserves a peaceful rest. I am absolutely sure that you guys did all for him that you could during his journey on this earth. The good memories will always remain.
We do indeed have to appreciate every moment, as we draw closer to our departure every hour.
Our prayers are with you guys.
PIZZA and !LUV
Thanks for those encouraging words and also all the prayers.
We are having a memorial service for my brother Mike on Saturday, a mass said in our childhood church, St Francis of Assisi, Roman catholic. Then a quiet luncheon with close family. I know it will be a tearful day, but I will go home peaceful because I know he is with the Lord and his heavenly family.
What can I say Lady Robin, as things are very emotional and difficult during these times.
The final goodbye at the memorial service is only meant for this life, as the greetings will come again, with much delight, when we are all re-united in our real home. We have to remember that we are all just on a temporary journey in this world and much greater things await after our departure.
We will be with all of you in spirit on Saturday and all strength to you.
!PIZZA and !LUV
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I am so sorry for your loss. Your brother was a warrior. I hope you find comfort in the good memories you have of him.
Big hugs.
Hugs right back at you! Thanks for your kindness, I know the sorrow will slowly drift away and those sweet memories will come into my heart and mind.
I So appreciate your comments.
Have a blessed day.
I'm so sorry to hear about Mike's passing @farm-mom. He sounded like, and I'm sure he was a very strong willed man, and loved by all. May he rest in peace and join Dorothy in looking over you all now
Thanks so much for your kindness and sympathy, my brother was an amazing man, he had such a strong will to live, and I admired his strength and courage.
So nice to hear from you, my friend.
Have a blessed day.
I'm very sorry for your loss... I've already experienced it so many years ago, 23 to be exact... only the best memories of our lost beloved ones remain and encourage us to keep going.
Big hugs to you.
Oh, my you must have been very young, so sorry, if you don't mind me asking, was a sibling, or parent? Gosh, life can be so painful sometimes. But you are so right, only the sweetest memories remain in our hearts and minds.
Thanks so much for your kindness and understanding.
Have a blessed day.
Hi again,
Yes, I was rather young, just in my thirties like my dear sister. The pain you experience in life it helps you fully enjoy the happy momments you find along the way.
Wish you a blessed day too 🤗
Oh man, life can suck sometimes, again, so very sorry, but you are so correct, the sorrow can help us appreciate life more, not take it for granted.
Thanks for the chat, I am feeling better.
Good night.
Jackie O, I am so sorry for all your sadnesses this year. Sending strength. You are in my thoughts.
Hi Fiona, how are you?
Losing our loved ones is so painful and it takes time to recover from such sadness, but we all must experience this human condition, we can't escape it, as you well know.
I give into the sorrow and cry whenever I feel like it doesn't matter where I am or who I am with, I let the tears flow. Then I pray for the beautiful memories to fill me up and recharge my spirit so I can move forward once again.
I pray you are recharging dear friend, stay strong, you had a beautiful man.
I am up and down. I am fortunate and blessed to live in a village surrounded by people who hold me.
Nice to know you have so many who care for you and share your grief.
It must still be so strange to not have your hubby around. I am sure with losing your soulmate, the shock, pain, and sadness take a lot longer to heal. My heart goes out to you.
Sending hugs and thank you for your kindness.
Much love to you, mama! My condolences.
Hello old friend, hope you and the family are well and happy.
Thanks for the love, your comments always make me smile.
I laugh when you call me mama because I think to myself, he could be one of my boys. hehe
My brother was really one of the good guys and I will miss him terribly, but it was time, he had suffered enough. Now he is at peace. Another angel to look after us.
I am so sorry about your big brother Mike and the terrible year Jackie O, my thoughts are with you and your family.
Hello, my friend, thanks for your kind words.
Losing someone you love really hurts, and we all will share the experience sometime in our lives. I am old enough to know, I can't escape the fact that losing loved ones is going to happen a little more often, so I embrace the pain, I cry whenever it hits me, and then I pray for the sweet memories of a life well lived to flood my head.
My biggest hope is that my own passing will be in the right order. I have too my friends who have lost their children, which I think would be unbearable.
Life is a roller coaster, and I am hanging on tight.
Every minute is precious.
My deepest condolences. Physically losing someone we love is without a doubt the most excruciating sensation one can feel. It seems that life loses color and sadness moves into the soul. I wish you a lot of strength in this process. Blessings.
Good morning @belkysmargarita, I truly appreciate your kind words and support.
All of us go through this journey, it hurts. But we have to accept this is part of life, embrace the sorrow then slowly the sweet memories will flood in.
Have a blessed and beautiful day.
Thoughts and prayers go out to you @farm-mom - thank you for sharing this heartfelt story
Thanks @pandamama, life is so fragile and we need to focus on the happy days and not the sad ones. I really appreciate your kindness and prayers
Keep strong @farm-mom
You also my friend, life is beautiful, worth the battle. You never know what tomorrow will brink.
Your brother - the tree stand - the fall. Eight hours before he was found; two more hours (almost) getting him out; a year before he could wiggle a toe; how many years before he could walk. Paralyzed at 43.
Losing two siblings in a year - I am so sorry!
What a great tribute to your brother!
Good morning @carolkean, thanks for stopping by.
It took nearly 2 years for him to walk again, quite a challenge, he was a fighter.
Life can sure throw some snowballs.
Have a wonderful day.