This post is a really great observational piece. I live in the UK and people always have to give the impression 'they're busy', even when they're not. They dare not say they're not busy as though it could be frowned upon or something. I mean how on earth could someone ever find the time to not be busy? That would be a lazy indolent person wouldn't it?!
I noticed even my own parents would have to subscribe to this societal norm which dictates you must always keep busy. And I think this is what you are explaining here, at least in part, with this post.
One of the classics my dad used to say when asked by friends how things are or how he and my stepmum were doing he would automatically respond well we haven't had time to stop really, again it was very important he gave the impression he was busy because otherwise he might look weak and useless somehow.
Work is important and being active is also important, that goes without saying. But you also need to be lazy sometimes, you need time for self indulgence and to unwind and destress. That's nothing to be embarrassed or ashamed of. We all need to do that, right? Perhaps if more of us found the time to be less busy, worry less about unhelpful societal conventions we might just still get things done but be a bit happier too.
Thoughtful comment, thanks!
As a piece of background, I am a Danish national, but while I was born there I didn't always live there. Of my first 20 years, about 12 were spent in Denmark, five in the south of Spain and three in the UK. Then I came to the States for University, but still went back and forth a lot for another five years. Since then, I've settled permanently here, although we do go back for holidays every few years or so... less frequently since the whole Corona circus. My mother was Danish, my Stepfather English.
My point being that some of the whole "busy-ness" tendency is likely cultural... and its extreme dwells here in the States. In retrospect, there was a certain joy to the Spanish way where so many things were done on the "mañana" principle... and the world basically rolled up at 1:30-2:00pm and everyone had "siesta" till 5:00... even construction sites, shops and so forth.
A friend of mine has dual citizenship US/Indonesia and he once pointed out similar differences. At one time — while helping US hotel chains get established in Indonesia — he had to explain local lore to western management. They were having a hard time keeping staff at the hotel, even while paying three times what anyone could hope to make locally. They would have really good workers who would then just quit and "for no particular reason." Turned out that when they had made enough money to not work for a year... they just stopped working and went back to their villages, never having changed their original lifestyles just because they had a well-paying job.
Maybe there's something to be learned there...
Yes, the whole busyness mentality is almost certainly a cultural thing, that's interesting that you believe the extreme of that mentality is more prevalent in the United States. I can believe what you're saying given the different countries you have lived in, that must be quite a broad insight and provides an excellent referent point.
I would still like to believe that the Spanish shut everything down for an hour or two each day to fit in a siesta, but not sure it's a convention that is followed much these days.
If we can earn enough money while still retaining what quality of life is left for generations that have come after boomers, then I'm all for it, no matter how you do it.