Friendship and Distance: Or, what it's like to keep in touch with a friend you can no longer have around...

October 2023, one week before the 20th of that month. One of the best female friends I have ever had the opportunity to know, and a fabulous human being; brave, strong and exceptional; out of the most absolute nothingness tells me: "I must tell you something". I immediately knew that something would not be the same. Rarely did she use drama for anything.... Then she informed me of the inevitable: "In 5 days from now, I will be leaving for Massachusetts, in the United States. My aunt has made the arrangements to be able to emigrate." I won't lie to you, the news gave me a lot of joy, but being a somewhat lonely girl, seeing how my only friend living in Venezuela was leaving, hurt me; and a lot....

Now, this story is not, precisely, about how she and I separated physically. It is about how the miles of distance have changed absolutely nothing. And yes, some people might say that as time goes by, it will be inevitable that we will part ways.... What I do believe, is that it is perfectly viable to grow through distance. She is there for me, and I am there for her. We never wrote to each other on a daily basis; even living close to each other, but from the substantial. From there, my admiration and love resides and remains.

She is a woman who has always had a strong and tough countenance. Something that I will admire her for the rest of my life. My characteristics are more her antonym. I am more about ideals and romance (generally speaking) than she is. If there is one thing she has that I have never seen in another woman I have met, it is to protect herself through logic. I myself have learned a great deal from her to recognize when someone is really worth it and when they are not. And not from an unfair point of view, but from what those people are capable of demonstrating; not talking. Action over words...

That last night together physically, we decided to share it with a bottle of Grant's (an inexpensive whiskey), chocolates and talks. I swear it was an experience I will never forget. I think she always loved the ease with which she always felt being around me. Being someone always with her guard up, you could rarely see her more relaxed, laid back and completely cheerful version of herself. Something, that without a doubt, today when I look back on it; not only brings back precious memories but is something I treasure quite a bit.

I guess, the best explanation lies in getting along. I met her not too long ago; about 5 years ago. But from day one we clicked. And I think she would also say the same as me. I love to hug, kiss and show affection; she is quite the opposite. If I got 3 hugs from her in 5 years, it was too much. But her warmth didn't start from there, but from the quality of her company. She has always been a staunch advocate of equality and the strength that women must hold in "a cruel, and stubbornly unjust world".

I use quotation marks, because I have quoted her verbatim.... It is incredible how distance makes certain things that we consider normal, routine and even not fully appreciated at the time, become something with a special added value. I suppose, then, that these lines that I write here are a tribute, but also an emotional outlet about what she has meant to me. I am still not completely used to her physical absence (she literally lives in another country).

Sometimes I even pick up my cell phone and halfway through a WhatsApp message within our chat, I realize that what I'm about to send cannot be..... We can't see each other, nor can I visit her for a bite to eat or tell stories for hours. That's the negative of absence and distance. That as a small trauma that is separation, rehabituarte to that need for physical connection, is something that costs a lot .... Less than 5 months have passed since the last time we hugged when we were together. She didn't cry, she was close, that's for sure. The truth is that we talk daily, and I feel her human quality in spite of the pains.

Photographs that are inside the body of this post, are a sample of our union despite the distance. She, someone who values the positive within vanity, always asks me for my opinion (woman to woman) about whether or not she is beautiful in a certain photo, posture, angles, etc. Obviously, I give her my opinion and thus the exchange of usefulness is guaranteed. With her I learned that real friendship between two women can be real. Without demerits, envy or criticism. Support, consideration, empathy, admiration; companionship and loyalty. She is my muse, my friend, my proud one. This is written by me, not knowing I could, but it is totally inspired by friendship.

From woman to woman, friend to friend, this is my vision for you, dear Lid. And many thanks to the people who read this post.