It's been a while since I have posted a lesson from the hack, and that has been very intentional. I'll most likely write more about WHY I have chosen to pause that for a while (probably this week!) but for now - let me just address something very real.
Let me start by saying, I thought I was very very silly for feeling this way, until I read @elizacheng's post a while ago, where she expressed VERY similar feelings. Then, I knew I should share this with those who might benefit from it.
PHSD.
Post Hack Stress Disorder. Obviously, I'm making a play on letters there - however, if you've been hacked a significant amount - you'll know that it really truly is a trauma. Is it just like PTSD? Oh, I'm fairly sure it is not as significant as that. However, there are probably some similarities worth noting. I think knowing that you're not alone in it, helps. I think knowing that others feel the same, provides a bit of relief.
I happened to be hacked through my Metamask wallet. At some point in the day on April 29, I was rushing through some sites (trying to transfer money to someone in a timely manner) and I was hasty. At some point, I do recall clicking on my metamask and putting in my key. Metamask will sometimes log you out, and ask you to log back in using your seed phrase. I thought nothing of this - until approximately 12 hours later, my wallet was cleaned out of $18000 USD.
Devastating to say the least.
But what happened after?
I had some odds and ends in that wallet (that were more precious to me because they were MINE, not because they were WORTH much) that I transferred to a friend and then I promptly closed the wallet.
There was something about knowing that THAT WALLET was the access point of the violation that associated all bad feelings with it, and closing it made me feel safer. I knew I could open it at any time, and I actually still have the wallet. (nothing is in it) But I DID NOT WANT TO. I didn't analyze that too deeply - I had been hacked, I didn't want to open the wallet, Simple.
Several weeks ago, a friend asked if I had been holding some tokens, and told me to check THAT wallet. I hadn't opened it since April - so I thought - hmmm I MIGHT have had tokens on the BNB side of that wallet.
But the strangest thing happened.
My heart rate went through the roof, I started to feel panicky, and I actually physically started to tremble. It was almost the equivalent of going back down the same road where you had gotten mugged/assaulted. I kept telling myself to calm down - it was just a silly wallet! But it was almost as if I felt like opening that wallet would somehow trigger the hacker that I was there - asking for more abuse.
I confirmed that I didn't have any tokens in there, closed the wallet, and then kinda brought myself back to a place where I assured myself that all that I was feeling was in my own head. Take deep breaths, and relax. It was over, I'm smarter now, use the lesson to just be more careful in the future.
But I couldn't help feeling absolutely ridiculously foolish for this PHYSICAL reaction to an ONLINE attack that had happened 4 months ago? And yet - it happened, and most likely happens to more people than feel comfortable to admit.
So what is the point to all this?
I guess the point is - sometimes we feel like we're alone. We blame ourselves for these very real, very plausible, very understandable reactions. We get caught up in the "oh my gosh - this ONLINE WORLD is not the same as the OFFLINE WORLD" - and that is wrong. In my opinion, the online world can sometimes be MUCH MORE REAL and AUTHENTIC than the offline world.
Here is my advice.
TALK ABOUT IT
Share what you went through. Don't drag it out - because that can be more harmful! But when the opportunity arises - SHARE with someone, HELP someone, and unload those feelings. Unpack them, and then LEAVE them to go make BETTER choices and live life.BE CAREFUL,
but don't live in fear. Fear (as we know from these last two years) has a way of destroying your mind and breaking you down into parts of the whole. Live with eyes wide open, but do not expect an attack at every turn. Adrenaline is good in spurts - not for your day-to-day existence.MOVE ON.
You do NOT need to open up that SAME wallet (and probably should never hahaha) - but CHANGE your keys, get a wallet you trust, do your research, and then take the steps to feel secure in what you're doing. Maybe it's a new platform, a new wallet, a new token. Whatever it is, take the time to get back on a horse that is SAFE and "ride like the wind, Bullseye"
(hehe - quote from Woody, Toy Story)
This post is part of the DreemPort Challenge this week, where we have linked arms with @wesphilbin and his #thoughtfuldailypost community. We will be shining the light on his community for two more weeks, encouraging others to participate, showering Dreem and HIVE tokens, and engaging with writers of all platforms that care to join! If you have a community that you would like DreemPort to come alongside in the future, please feel free to contact me!
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When I was much younger, my Instagram account was hacked and i almost cried, but reading your post i feel stupid crying over an account worth nothing.
You really handled your hack experience like a strong captain you are🙂 Some people might actually consider suicide after such a hack
please do NOT feel stupid crying over that.
that is the WHOLE point of the post!!! hahaha
that YOUR EXPERIENCE - and THAT VIOLATION was ABSOLUTELY REAL AND AUTHENTIC AND OFFENSIVE TO YOU!!!!
so - you are 100% within your rights as a human being to feel that hurt and express that emotion.... just dont' get caught up in it hehehe
Express, release, learn, and then go flourish with that knowledge the situation provided
i love you DozeyDoz!!!
@doziekash I totally agree with @dreemsteem
Crying is not stupid. Don't feel bad at all. Crying is a way of letting go and chasing away those negative vibes. Crying can make our thoughts clearer (at least it does to me). Sometimes is not about the monetary value. It's much more than that.
After crying, get back up and start again. Either at the same place or somewhere else whichever we are comfortable with. It's ok to slow down and stop for a while, as long as we don't think it's the end of the world and do things to harm ourselves, then I think it's fine.
With love ♥️♥️♥️
!beer
Indeed crying makes thought clearer and after that you get up dust yourself and start moving.
This is so true, sometimes it could be the connection you have built with people there, it could also be your business contact you could only communicate with there and so many other things.
Thanks A lot for these kind and beautiful words of advice
so agree with you!!! of course!!!
hope you're doing better with each day my friend!
These are really strong comforting words. Thanks A lot ma'am
The online world is really as real as the offline world, i've actually met some people who build their life, relationships, and what have you online. It's almost like they are dead in the offline world and now live online.
Now I'm blushing so hard☺
Love you right back Ma'am
hehehehe i'm probably very much like what you described. not so much dead offline - but definitely more ALIVE online hahhhaa
to me - it is much more real.
think about how people have to put on all these masks and coverings in real life!!! I think that is not present as much in the online world.
maybe some disagree hahahaha but my experience has been that i see more of the REAL - in the online world hehehe
p.s. love to make you blush heheeh
That's quite true, people tend to be comfortable to be free and be real online, then offline they prefer to hide in masks.
That is so true, i mean you are always online. I'm beginning to think the only time you are offline is when you sleep lol
hahahahahaha and maybe i'm even online then??? LOLOLOL
Yes, sharing it and talking it out loud to someone really help. Facing it and putting it behind us is a life long learning. Until this day I still "curse" the hacker(s) on and off. But I am back into the game. Paranoid a bit, taking extra precaution and sometimes scare myself a bit by overthinking certain things. And yes, I do have the similar physical reaction like heart racing at top speed (feels like it is going to fly out from my chest anytime), cold and sweaty hands, trembling inside out. I know I need more time to deal with it, maybe it will go away someday or maybe it will follow me throughout my entire life. But I am not stopping down. I will not let this stupid evil hack ruin my life. I think sharing our experiences will not just help us to recover, but it can help others too. A lot of us just think nah, it's not gonna happen to me until it struck.
Sending you all my love♥️♥️♥️
And to all of you out there, better be safe than sorry. Guard and protect our own wallet and asset!
!beer
i know exactly how you feel - EXACTLY. paranoid - but sometimes scaring myself too! lol
isn't it so crazy how our physical reaction is????
I think as time goes on - we will get over it. truly - but lets not try to push ourselves and just let it happen, right? it will come 😍
and that's right... we don't back down. we stand strong! and help and love and encourage... and all of it!
and you're so right - my husband even opened up crypto stuff about 4 months before my hack. and he was telling me to do all these hack proof things that he had heard... and I kinda teased him about being so sensitive as if "I knew better"
we truly don't think its gonna happen until it DOES!!! lol that is the truth!!!
love you!!!! thanks for chiming in!!!! with both of us encouraging people - maybe we will just touch one person??
At least we have touched and encourage each other. The next person will be a bonus. And the next next will be double bonus. ♥️
Let's keep spreading the love and positivity and SMILE to everyone.
Amen my sista :)
The Hack, and the PHSD is almost definitely the same feelings and stress that ANYONE that gets robbed feels. PHSD, while a newly minted name, is real. As real as the stress someone who gets robbed at knifepoint in a parking garage. Most people chose to NEVER go back to that garage. and it makes perfect sense to NEVER go back to that wallet, for you!
You totally get it! that's exactly the feeling - and if you read Eliza's reaction - and Sofs also in the comment section and Dozie's too... its super common - but I think rarely talked about
hopefully this starts the conversation!
@dreemsteem
Oh my dear friend... I often emphasize the fact, that there are people behind these screens.... And no differentiation, between On Line and Off Lineweren't alone. As we've discussed before, like minded people gravitate to each other. And you emphasize this when you said the following:. I also felt the importance of creating my #thoughtfuldailypost movement, to let people know (that's right) they
So then... I am truly sorry that you went through this terrible situation. But here we are now... being thoughtful, and letting other's know they don't have to feel alone...
A wonderful #thoughtfuldailypost! And certainly a fitting #dreemportchallenge submission!
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thank you my friend!!!!!!
I'm so glad that you saw that too - cuz that's what matters.
we're not alone, are we???
we just are not alone!!!
thank you so much for the luv and the wine!!!! hehehehe I shall drink it thinking of you! 😍
it's going to be fun to see these posts tomorrow hehehe
This is the first time I've heard about PHSD. Thank you for this helpful post, and I appreciate the tips to overcome this disorder. 🙌
oh - it is just my definition about what happens after a hack :)
but for me - it was absolutely 100% my experience!
and i pray you NEVER get hacked - so you NEVER have to experience it! but if you do... come find me and I'll cry with you for sure!!!! 🤗
and then i'll help you get back on the horse again 😊
Oh I see. But your insights are noteworthy, and it made me think about the reality of this situation. It's pretty serious. I am glad you were able to recover from it and bounce back🎉
yeah me too, I hope I never ever get hacked🙏and I hope you won't ever experience it again as well
I appreciate that! and it really is so serious. It's evil that hackers would hide behind their computers and violate people right and left - but... they do!
and they leave behind a wake of victims who are confused, angry, scared, hurt, etc...
the more we talk about it - the more we help others! I truly hope that you never get hacked too! it is an awful awful nightmare!
Being hacked is a violation. Every bit as much as the dude who levelled the rifle and robbed my parents store those many years ago. I still feel a jolt when I see someone with a face covering, especially a balaclava. I have no doubt there is at least a level of anxiety when you open your wallet.
Yes - I felt so silly when it happened - and so relieved when I found out it happened to others!
thank you my friend @stayten hehehe and @innerblocks !
I am not saying much, every time I have to power up I feel that fear come on.
I thought of you as I was writing this too Sofs!!!!
it's really palpable isn't it????
i mean -i ts been 4 months for me - and it is still VERY much there
So very palpable that I don't want to go there at all.
Ouch... sorry to hear this happened (I also read that you are also sick at the moment?). Sending you the best wishes from the other side of the Atlantic!
Oh no! I am so sorry to hear about that. @elizacheng is a good friend and she told me when it happened. I can't imagine what you both went through. But I think that if it was me, the PHSD would be because I felt like my personal space was so violated and I couldn't do anything about it. I mean one moment there and next moment gone and you don't even know what hit you. Stay strong! With the bull market still on us, who knows the things that can happen! I hope that all good things will happen to you from now on!