Life waits for no one. I've heard that turn of phrase numerous times throughout my lifetime, and I suppose it's true, time does march on. It just feels like when you are afflicted with autoimmune disease that life is barely in your view most of the time.
That sounds a bit morose, I fully admit that, it's just that since I have returned home from our Vegas adventure I have been in the cusp of autoimmune illness flare-up hell.
Postmodern tech-infused life is a balancing act to keep up with as it is, there are so many demands baying at us constantly, especially if you have a family. And honestly, I love taking care of things, my family, people, land, you name it, but when your immune system is trying to end you it makes something that is already challenging downright hellish.
There are days, like today, where I am hurting so incredibly badly, have pushed myself for so long just to keep up, along with trying to implement all the wisdom of proper care of the self, where I am just ready to lay down in the yard and stare at the sky.
The thing is, I know I am not alone, and that gives me that little bit of oomph I need to pick up my carcass and keep on keeping on.
On the philosophical level, I know that keeping up is just an illusion. We don't need to keep up with anything. I do desire to do good though, which is why I don't quit.
But let me tell you my friends, there are days I just want to hang it all up and stop.
Trying to do advanced college math or write a research paper while being choked by your thyroid gland and navigating a foggy and inflamed brain is a bit trying, but I would probably feel this way anyway at this point in my life, so I'm just gonna push through.
Might take a nap though later.
That's the art of the act of keeping up. It is an individual tapestry as varied as the view each human sees when they look at the night sky. No single composition is the same, no single experience lived is of the same color, yet they are all struck on the same palette. There's peace to be had in pondering our shared yet unique experiences.
I just need to be mindful of that.
So today, if you are feeling as I am, overwhelmed a bit by it all due to the fallible, malfunctioning reality of living in a physical, decaying meat sack, then I am here for it with you. You don't have to keep up with everything, but that you try to keep up with anything, especially in the face of pain and challenge, makes you an awesome and amazing creature indeed.
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Hmm
Trying to keep up with everything may be stressful and at the same time may even make us confused
We gotta let go of a few and keep up with some
Well said for sure! I am always evaluating what I should let go and what I should keep. Sometimes that's a chore too lol!
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Indeed. There are days where I swear I can feel my fallible, malfunctioning meat sack decay over night. Then I think of the math trying to extrapolate how many such changes can a body possibly live through. It sucks and can wear on one's soul. Be as well as you can be, Kat.
It definitely can wear on one's soul for sure. And it most definitely sounds like you get it, my friend, I'm somewhat more well and I hope you are beyond swell or at least slightly less decaying!
!PIZZA
I slowed down deliberately on my return trip homeward because I can feel the fatigue levels creeping up. Besides, I needed a Laundromat break so I have clean clothes for the last few days of driving. No one wants their unmentionables getting re-used several days in a row! I hope I don't have a serious crash myself, because while seeing the eclipse was fun, the journey has taken a lot out of me.
No. No one wants that at all! And I'm glad that you are taking your time and taking care of yourself. It sounds like you have a had a blast, and I am hoping you have no crashes of any kind!
See ya soon!
!PIZZA
Well, yeah, obviously a literal crash is also to be avoided if at all possible.
Never a truer word was spoken
@generikatThis feeling of having to keep up or keep going, is one I'm all too familiar with as well. I feel that sometimes it is a positive and constructive mindset, as despite the pain the feeling of satisfaction in completing tasks counteracts the suffering, but other times it's just better to put the feet up and give in.
After nearly 10 years living with chronic illness it has become instinctual when to keep doing, and when to accept that it is OK to just be.
I hope you feel better soon 🤞 at least you have a lovely little fur ball moggy to comfort you 😺
I do a lot more feet up-putting these days, I have to, and I know you get it my dear friend, because ten years is a long time to endure.
That said, I am really working on this, it's really hard for me to be OK with just be, but between hearing awesome others re-enforce the necessity of it along with fur ball support, well, I am getting there.
Hope you are feeling well as well😊
!PIZZA
My biggest challenge these days is sleep deprivation. I wake up multiple times during the night, and am often awake for 1-3 hours. Recently I've even had troubles falling asleep when I go to bed, a previously-rare problem. And some days I can't even nap. I get up in the morning just as tired as when I went to bed, and wonder why I even bothered. My brain does not do well without sleep, so I'm forgetting things and misplacing things at an alarming rate. It's the pits.
I long ago gave up trying to keep up, decades ago in fact. I do what I can, get help where I can, and rest when I have to. Stuff gets done, but nowhere near what needs to be done...
I admire how you have persevered where you can, asked for help when you need it, and let go of the rest. I know there will always been things that need to be done and at some point they will get done, or they won't, and that's okay, so it's the letting go part that I am definitely working on these days.
Good thing I have such awesome examples😊
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