because I refuse to hold onto any such bad experiences to make them my identity.
Yes <3 So agree with that. A lot of people like to play it like they don't have a choice. But I don't see why you'd ever cast yourself in that role.
Someone once asked me "what is my story" in an attempt to see what connection they could make, or just wanting to apply a label to be able to "relate" to me.
Also a good way to manipulate, once you wheedle out one's traumas and insecurities. They're putty in your hands, or might be. Which is why you want to be careful who you share any sorrow or fear with.
Thank you! I'm glad you found yourself in this post.