I’m wondering what you are doing right now? Are you doing your best now? Sipping coffee with the love of your life? Catching stars in the night sky? Are you already pulling the pieces back together now? I have so many questions to ask, but I know you are happy and contented. Don’t ask me how I know. Just trust me, I know.
I just want you to know that as I'm writing this to you, it feels like everything is just falling apart and everything stops making sense, everything and everyone is at war. It felt like everyone was already competing with one another and I am here now, trying to find the exact meaning of life. And these thoughts suffocate me. It’s like rain doesn’t stop falling on me and it’s been a long time since I saw a star in the sky. I’m hoping every day that one day I can sit at the top of the mountain away from the loudness of the world and feel that I am here now, and let the surroundings know that I’m still existing.
I remember when I look back, I always told myself that I wanted to be an astronaut. Besides the fact that I really love to do stargazing, I want to study the moon, the stars, everything that we see from the earth, and everything that makes me wonder. I just want to ask them how they still shine so brightly even if sometimes no one appreciates them. Why are there so many of them but they are just happily sparkling without hating each other? But as I grew up, I just wanted to become an astronaut not to ask questions but to thank them, because of the dark, the empty spaces between the stars and how unorganized they have reminded me that it would be okay, that of all the darkness I have in my life, everything will be alright. As long as you are there, sparkling and doing your best, we can create a beautiful constellation.
There are days that were just like today, that I don’t want to talk to everyone. I just want to be silent and take a break. I will recalculate everything and focus on my dreams. I know, someday we will finally get there, and we will remember the dark days and storms that’s do not stop falling, we’ll thank ourselves because we never stopped walking, we let go of our umbrella and we danced in the rain as we see rainbow in the sky as a message that there’s still hope. We will hold onto that.
Wherever you are right now, please don’t come back here. Don’t look back. Focus on being happy there, you deserved that after all the pain that we experienced. Smile a lot more. Feed your soul. Breathe. Chase your dreams. Be alive. Go to that party. Travel around the world. Drink more. Get that house and car you ever wanted in your life. Find your loved one. Run. Please run and don’t let these things ever find you again.
I also just want you to know that there are people along the way that I leave because that was the right thing to do. I don’t want to leave but I need to save myself. Oh, God knows how I wish they stayed. It’s never the same anymore, I’m still loving them from afar although I know that everything changes, and they already forget the good things we ever did. Those late-night walking on the streets, beach getaway, the heartbreaks we all shared, a beer with a spice of the stories of our lives. I still miss them today, but manageable. Sometimes I’m scared, because I know that everything will happen in my life, Ill face it alone. But you know what, when they leave, they are right when they say that things will eventually turn out to be just fine. Life really doesn’t stop there.
Keep pursuing our dreams and never stop searching. But I just want you to know that there are things that we need to give up along the way because life doesn’t allow it to happen even if we don’t stop trying. Just keep on track and life will get you there, the place where we are supposed to be.
As I’m writing this to you, maybe you are now in your favorite place while listening to your favorite music. Remember indie music that you love? Rock music that when we hear we keep on headbanging? Linkin Park? Yes, your favorite band. The band that saves you. Are they still your favorite? What’s your favorite music genre now? I hope when you read this, you are not afraid to shuffle music anymore. You’re not afraid that when you shuffle music, it’ll play those songs that remind you of heartbreaks that you experienced, music that you used to dance to with the people you love but are not on your side anymore. Those revenge songs, I hope you already find peace in your heart. Those songs that keep you calm, when you feel like everything gets loud. Are you still playing that particular playlist you once shared with your friends? It’s fun to go back, isn’t it? I know you really love music until now, because it’s the only thing that’s on your side when everyone decides to leave. Music stays, that’s why you hold on to that. Remember when we dreamt of making a music album? Pursue that! Give them those messages that you survive after every storm that you have passed, inspire them that you’re still standing today because you believe. Give those people something to hold on to, they need that.
I hope you already learn how to forgive. Those people that hurt you. Those people that leave without leaving an explanation why, the cause of your heartbreaks. And yourself, for thinking of not being enough. I know that all this time, you keep trying. You fail, but at least you’re trying. Release those self-loathing thoughts that once weighed us down. Be free.
I know that you’ve been strong your whole life. I know that you already realized that crying doesn’t make you look weak. Me as your past self, I don’t cry a lot and I don’t even know when I last cried. But you know what makes me cry? When things make me FEEL and beautiful things make me feel the most. Beautiful things remind me of hope and to move forward. I don’t know but when I see a beautiful mountain, a sea of clouds, a sunrise, beautifully written music, wholesome videos, kindness, good friends support, passionate people, and love, they make me feel alive and make me want to cry. I think my soul desperately needs to believe in a better world. So maybe these tears are tears of hope. Good hearts and places are so beautiful. I cherish those kinds of moments.
As I’m saying at the start of this letter, I know that you are happy and contented now because starting today, I decided to change everything, step one closer and be the best version of myself. Remember when you always told your friends about the butterfly effect phenomenon? Which is the phenomenon where “the sensitive dependence on initial conditions in which a small change in one state of a deterministic nonlinear system can result in large differences in a later state.” I’m doing it right now; I’ll be better starting from now on. I’ll be wiser, stronger and healthier, happier, be more confident, be more observing, so that I may be a mighty lion like you today.
I know that you’ve already learned what I’m writing about, I just want you to not forget all of this, we both wish you a good and a happy life. We both run just to get away from here. I can see you laugh or smile or cry as I’m writing this letter to you, yes, I know that you can’t believe that you are in a good place now after all these things that we experienced. And I can see that you have a lot of good friends now, a lot of things have already changed. You’ve grown so old and way richer than me. Always remember if you have a bad day there, because we know it’s not happy all the time. Send me a letter here. I’ll be here for you as I always be.
And to end this, I want you to know that I’m starting to create a new chapter. Remember this day as I’m writing this to you because this is the day that everything starts to change. I’ll be like a roaring wind that can cause a big disaster for those who are trying to stop me from getting there where you are right now. No one can stop me now. Everything may seem too blurry, but I already see color. It’s shiny, golden like daylight. I already see the way, and now I know what I truly want, and I will make sure to get it.
I like the idea of writing a letter to your future self. It gives you a glimpse of how much you've grown and changed. Keep chasing your dreams and create unforgettable memories!
Yes, it is. Thank you @cthings 😊
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@nachtsecre...
It's late Friday evening, in my world, and as I looked through our community notifications. I saw your post and thank you for choosing to post in our community. This reminds me of those books they used to sell... a way for Fathers or Mothers, to leave daily notes to their children. Then share them with them, when they are old enough to grasp the understanding of the meaning. With all the negativity in the world... This would be a wonderful thing to pass down to our children, friends, and loved ones; life is indeed, so very short. Why not let others know how we feel? Especially, when it comes to our own moral compass. I like the energy you are creating here, and hope you might consider stopping by our community again soon... I hope you have a wonderful weekend, my friend.
Wes...
!LUV
(2/10) sent LUV. | connect | community | HiveWiki | NFT | <>< daily@nachtsecre, @wesphilbin
! help(no space) to get help on Hive. InfoWhat a nice words. Thank you @wesphilbin ☺️