This is what people think of me too. They think I have nothing to worry about because I don't share my worries to anyone, I prefer to do that with my siblings because they only can understand me. So, people assume all is going well with me. But I don't bother about that.
Just like what you did thinking a lot of things and even learning from the moonlight, that is one way I let out my worries and pour them out to God to help me and I have always had this different peace that calms me down. I believe it is God talking to me. Do you believe in Him, too?
I think keeping things secret is good. At least nobody gets any chance to know the weakness of mine.
Nature and natural things are very good in healing and I feel there are hidden blessings of God and very effective in healing.
!PIZZA
Yea. That's what I do now. To keep secrets but not with my siblings because they are the ones I can always trust to be there for me.