It's because I wasn't creating, and a creator that doesn't create, it's a little bit like a river that doesn't flow, it either floods the land, or dries out.
I'm glad you had the intuition to realise this and get your creativity back to life again. Many before you didn't and lived out a sad and despondent life of what ifs.
The truth is every one of us are walking talking miracles of engineering and Darwinian evolution. All around us are free wonders, nature's colours and smells, birdsong, friendships, love and everything in between.
Embrace the good energy of people and repel thr negativity like you convey below, and one wont do to badly.
Always remember this, the person that criticizes you is mostly projecting their own insecurities, on to you.
You have it well figured out man, you are present and are now living your best life, free of irrational worries. Worries certainly exist but so many people carry around irrational 'what ifs' and 'if only i hads'. Life is too short for that excess weight of projection and nostalgia. We've gotta live in the now and smell the flowers while we can.
Peace out bro.
Man, that was beautiful 😍