It's so easy to develop bad patterns without even realising and ironically it's often our lack of self esteem that puts us into these downward spiralling patterns. We push everyone away from us without realising we're doing it or even how we're doing it. Yet the hardest thing to acknowledge is that when relationships continually go sour for us, the common denominator is ourselves.
It seems like fate brought you quite a gift with your neighbour.
Bad patterns as easy to develop and so tough to break through, but there is always a guiding light which keeps giving us directions and we need to follow that, else as you mention the denominator will always be us. Thank you for sharing your views @minismallholding