Keeping a relationship smooth is not a matter of joke. It's like a continuous effort to make it flow. But it's true we can't guarantee that there will be no argument. Rather I would say, sometimes arguments are good for relationships to make clear many things. But there should be some boundary while we argue.
You will notice because of anger and anxiety we react and respond while arguing something we may not do in any normal situation. We may not do it intentionally but the impact of this will also not be temporary. That's why we should be aware of what we are saying and what we shouldn't in an argument. And I'm not talking about an argument with your partner, this is applicable to all kinds of relationships.
- Personal attack.
This is enough to ruin a relationship. You should present your logic but never use any personal attack as and open.
- Defending.
Not accepting your misdeed is the biggest mistake we make to defend ourselves. We should accept and move forward.
- Bad words.
Maybe you don't use any slang but you insult others personally while you argue. Using bad words, contempt and insulting are no good.
- Not making space.
If you don't listen, if you don't give other the space to talk then there will be no potential outcome from your argument. And the relationship will also not work.
Keeping these points in mind is nothing difficult. But our emotion doesn't always let that happen. It needs our intention to make a relationship work. If you promise yourself you will not make it worse through a bad argument then you can do that. Just remember to keep the personal boundary and respect. Other things will come automatically!
Well said. Arguments are moments that have the power to either improve the relationship by allowing us to understand each other, or be destructive by not following these guidelines.