Ladies of hive #219: Traditional weddings in my culture

in Ladies of Hive2 days ago

Marriage being a unique celebration which differs based on the traditions, cultures and beliefs of a place is what intrigues me. Also, the way my country Nigeria which is diversified by many cultures celebrate marriage is also fascinating.


[Source:https://www.pexels.com/photo/a-group-of-men-in-african-clothing-playing-drums-27291181/]


Coming from the southern part of Nigeria, the language spoken from one of the states is Ibibio and the approach to celebrating marriage is a bit different from other parts of the country.
Here the processes involved in getting married traditionally is seen as a fun-filled game and exciting time involving different kinds of games and dance.


There are different stages involved in the traditional wedding.

The first stage which is introduction is a stage where some of the groom's family together with groom meet with the bride's immediate family to declare their intentions. If the groom is approved,he is then instructed to come with his extended family to the bride's extended family to her hometown.


[Source:https://www.pexels.com/photo/portrait-of-man-in-traditional-clothing-20094335/]


Here, which is the second stage is called "Ndidiong ufok" meaning to know the house of the bride. In this stage, the family of the bride welcomes them to the house and introduces them to every member of the family. Then the different local delicacies such as sliced cassava,edita iwa also called tapioca and different kinds of soups are brought out and introduced to the family.


[Source:https://www.pexels.com/photo/cooked-food-on-white-ceramic-plate-8166269/]
After this is done, the "List" is presented to the groom's family which includes requirements from each member of the family for the official ceremony as well as members of the bride's community; also penalty techniques are observed for example if the bride was already living with the groom or is expecting his child then it is added to the list, and negotiations are also done concerning the list.


The third stage is the "Search", while all the stages above are done, the bride-to-be is not present so this stage is to usher her out for both families to see. Here,a woman from the bride's family appears with two different ladies on two different occasions to make demands from the groom's family on which one is the actual bride and payment is made. On the third trip, the bride is brought accompanied with a long train of women who sing and dance her into the building.


[Source:https://www.pexels.com/photo/woman-in-a-bright-dress-and-headscarf-posing-with-a-white-fan-at-a-celebration-19581285/]

After it is done, prayers are made by the eldest member of the family for the couple.


The last stage is the official ceremony where members of the community are invited and before this happens, it means the items on the list have been presented to the bride's family, so that in the course of the celebration the items for the community is presented to them as well.

Then the couple are involved in one or two games and a lot of cultural dances as well as food are displayed on that day.


[Source:https://www.pexels.com/photo/people-laughing-and-celebrating-15899543/]


The ceremony is all about sharing the beauty and uniqueness in our culture and way of living.


Thank you for reading

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What an interesting set of customs! Thanks for sharing!

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I am interested to know about the list. What does ot contain? Clothings or furniture or something else? The custom seem interesting and opposite to subcontinental culture where groom family recieve gifts on the wedding