"Introvert Talks" is meant to be a new initiative or theme, where I myself as an introvert, just talk about reflections and thoughts about my life, or maybe share more personal stuff. :)
This is my weekly post under this "Introvert Talks" theme and let's see where it takes me and us.
I don't have a topic today.. So I thought I would just go with the flow and just share some of the thoughts that have been bothering me, or rather, just occupying my mind. Maybe writing it out will at least feel a little better...
One moment, life can be good to us, and another moment, everything can turn topsy turvy. March was just another awful month for me, but I am glad that I can take comfort that a big part of the "worst stuff" is over and hopefully, I am nearing the light at the end of the tunnel.
I got to spend more time than usual with my parents, because they had follow up medical appointments this month. I realise they are getting older and their movements are getting slower, and their minds are a lot less sharp. It made me wonder if I would be like that when I reach my 60s or 70s. Will people around me be patient with me? Will I struggle to keep up with all the society? Somehow it feels scary, because even in my 30s, I already see a difference in my body now versus 5 or 10 years ago. I know it's a bit of overthinking on my part, but it counts as a reflection too right?
I created "more work" for myself by engaging a specialist to inspect my place for mould infection. It's not an uncommon scenario given the tropical climate and high humidity environment in my country. It all started with a little bit here and there, and I tried to clean it on my own, using white vinegar, using chemical solutions. Success was mixed and it was quite tiring physically especially for my arms. Anyway, the mould kept coming back so I thought I should just engage the experts, to assess the situation and also to do the hard work of disinfection. Long story short, the disinfection was done and I thought they did a pretty good job. It's a costly service, but with personal health at stake, I think it's worth it.
And then the next step is to get the painting done. I am still in the process of arranging it, and I hope everything can be sorted out by early or mid April. It's always kinda messy to do painting when there's stuff in the house to shift and all that, and it's another costly service, but I guess the positive thing is I get to choose new colours for my place (even though to be honest, I am pretty fine with my existing ones).
Finally, work. With all of that happening above, I had to take time off work to deal with those personal and family matters, and my work deadlines just bunched up and it was quite disruptive to be on leave and at work on and off, having to catch up on stuff, etc. I guess people with kids probably also face the same issues as well, having to juggle work versus life. And then there's also a reduction in manpower for my team as well. Not surprising considering all the cuts reported in the news, but it's demoralising nonetheless. Life goes on I guess.
The weather isn't helping too. It has been raining cats and dogs the past few days and everytime I head out, be it for work, be it for lunch, my shoes will always be wet despite carrying an umbrella. I feel like I should go for a nature walk to get some fresh air and soak in some sunlight to lift my moods, but it's not possible at the moment.
Alright, that's all I have. First time doing such (negative and whiny) ramblings, hope you don't mind, and thanks for reading if you made it this far. Don't worry about me, I am fine. Humans are always resilient I believe. In the meantime, it's just about being patient and making my way to the end of the tunnel, where the light is. :)
Ah I hate a case of the gloomies! That sucks man, hopefully they fixed the mold issues once and for all!
I hear you with the parents stuff. My parents are getting up there as well, and I can tell from talking to my dad when I get to. He slowed down on his side hustle work, even though they need and like the money. He couldn't do it anymore, and in a weird way it's also because I wasn't there to help him which he understands and gets, but it just makes you feel a little bad, you know?
I think taking time off of work is important, because if we are working all the time then we will just get burned out which is also not good. As difficult as it is to take it off with deadlines and things piling up, the good thing is that I think it proves to the team and management that we can't be walked all over. We do have obligations you know! Yes it gets quite the juggle with kids :D
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Thanks for taking time to pen this. Really appreciate this.
I just opened a post and wrote whatever I felt yesterday, and then call it a night and went to sleep. Slept for 9 hours straight.
Yeah I think as we grow older, we just have more responsibilities and obligations, and at times it's challenging to juggle so many balls at once, especially if they bunch up at the wrong timing. But of course, we will and have to manage in our own ways.
Sorry to hear about the situation with your parents too. I think we try our best to balance our commitments and I am sure you are doing your best to set aside time for them too. :)
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