this was an interesting read and had me reflecting. I started to become aware of a legacy, if you will, of types of behaviour I had and the underlying reasons for it. It took a lot of years to recognize why I did, avoided or was compulsed to do certain things. Then upon realising the whys It was a matter of drawing a line under it, apportioning no blame so as to let it go and take steps to free myself of those compulsions and behaviours. We are moulded my a number of external influences when young and they can be amazing helpful in conditioning and very destructive also. Its not always easy to navigate on your own as quite often others will recognize traits you have that you may not have picked up on yourself. I am still learning, shedding and embracing so many of these adopted behaviours having recognised their roots from my youth and why they came to be.
This self-reflection on our early experience can tell us a lot. As a parent, there are so many parts I don't want to repat for my child, but at the same time, I don't necessarily know any better. At least, I don't know what the right way is, just a different way.
A lot of growing up and maturing, is unlearning what we were taught were the right ways to behave.
It is an endless journey, but how do you think you are doing with it?
I’m a pa with things cos I understand the origins of so much now. Also my son is 24 and has turned out so well,. I take no credit for it cos I am unaware as yet whepat behaviors he will attribute to my parenting in the future. We get on good though so I’m not overly worried haha
Best you can really hope for, right? :D