I have often read in articles where people are dismissive of advice coming from older people as being tone deaf and out of touch with the current reality - because when they were coming up, the situation was different. Sure, it was - but does that mean that the advice isn't valuable? At least as I have observed, many of the people who dismiss the advice haven't actually tried to follow the advice at all. For instance, one article today had a millionaire (who worked for his millions) say that young people should "live within their means so they can build assets"
Terrible advice?
The advice has always been the same.
And while it might be harder to live within means with cost of living pressures, there is also a lot of expectation about what is necessary to live, with many people making lifestyle choices over wealth choices. Sure, that is not an issue - but one can't then complain about not being able to build wealth, if doing things that are working against wealth building.
I have also seen stories where some younger people have taken the advice and spent a few years "going without" what their peers can't do without, and have been able to invest into real estate, or generative assets like stocks and are doing quite well for themselves.
Is the advice out of touch?
It is not a case that if someone can do it, anyone can do it, but if people aren't putting in the work to even attempt it, they shouldn't be dismissing the advice as if it doesn't work. It is like stretching - anyone can become more flexible than they are currently, unless they don't stretch. And a lot of people wish they were more flexible, but because stretching takes time, effort, and a fair bit of discomfort at times, they don't. Similarly, a lot of people visit a personal trainer for a program, but end up just doing what they want anyway.
Was the trainer wrong?
A lot of the entitlement in today's world stems from a belief that an individual can do as they please, but should still be getting the results that they want to get. Even when what they are doing is counterproductive. A lot of what people are doing these days across many fields of want is counterproductive to what they want to achieve, or how they want to feel. For instance, I wrote a piece about mental health and what I see is a lot of people who want to blame others, than taking responsibility for themselves.
For example, a lot of evidence suggests that one of the reasons that young people are struggling with their mental health is because they have been raised on screens, on social media, on impersonal connections, and have been conditioned to be hypersensitive to how they fell, under the assumption that how they feel is the correct way to feel. Yet, how many young people are getting off their screens? How many are disconnecting from social media? How many are working out how to acknowledge their emotions without reacting to them, to manage their feelings, rather than be driven by them? How many are really working out what intimacy means?
Close to zero.
Because they are under the belief that despite them not getting what they desire in their lives, they still expect to be able to do all the things they want, in a way that they feel comfortable in doing it. This attitude of entitlement is holding people back in so many ways, but because it is there, like a narcissist who can't see themselves as what they are, they believe it is all someone else's fault, someone else's responsibility.
Young people are not alone in this - there are plenty in the older age groups too, but there is a key difference. The young people have a long life ahead of them, and if they don't start working their shit out now, they are going to be in for a lifetime of suffering. And no matter who is to blame, it is of little comfort when life is filled with pain and disappointment - especially without the tools to accept it, let alone be able to have a chance to overcome it.
Simplify.
One of the biggest personal challenges we face today is the amount of choice we have at our fingertips for how we spend our time and money. One of the benefits of the older generations at the same age, is that they didn't have a smorgasbord of options available, so they didn't have to expend as much energy or willpower to make decisions. Simpler times can be created, if we just look at all of the complication and mess in our lives, and clean it up. If we investigate our environment and look at all our activities, unless we are coping well in life, we should be looking to reduce what we do, that we don't need to do.
The idea that we can do anything is a fallacy.
It is not doing us any favours to believe we can have it all in our lives. It is not possible, at least for the enormous majority of us. So, we have to recognise that we can't, and some things on our bucket list will remain in the bucket. Take the top 10 things you want to accomplish in your life. Rank them in importance from 1 to 10, and then cross out the the bottom seven.
Keep it real.
And when it comes to those top three, work your fucking ass off to get them. Perhaps you might do really well and be able to move onto four and five, or perhaps you will only get number one - but it is better than living a life chasing everything, and getting nothing.
But what do I know.
I am out of touch.
Taraz
[ Gen1: Hive ]
I'm randomly reminded of one of my daughter's gymnasts who at the end of last year declared she was going to quit gymnastics for footy with the mistaken belief that she would then be able to do whatever she wanted. She looked disbelieving when we told her that she would still have to do what her footy coach said. I don't know if she ended up joining footy as well but she did end up coming back this year XD
So did the old people once. Seems some of the narcs that are the same age as us or older are really feeling it now, but it is of course the rest of the world that's the problem, none of this is their fault. And some of the ones I know of predate screens.
I only know of the ones I know about second or third hand because I don't deal with at all these days, people just like to tell me things
Why did you bother with a top 10 if you were going to cross the bottom seven off just do a top 3 XD
The thing that gets me about dismissing advice from older people (and I swim in that as a parent of teenagers) is the fallacy that we are not alive and interacting with the current world. It is not like that anymore. I know! I saw it how it was, saw how it has changed, and am more engaged in the current world than you are. Besides wisdom gained from decades of learning and failing and achieving, perhaps the fact that we live in the same house, town and society might be of some value to you?
The one thing I have to check myself on is acknowledging that everyone has to take their own path. That and dumbass mistakes / skewed viewpoints based on convenience and entitlement are a part of the learning path they and even we take.
I can explain it for them but I can’t understand it for them. So, I won’t paint them with the wide younger generation brush and just be here to pick them up when they fall, even if it was because they jammed a stick in their own spokes.
Well said. These people are in their 20s and 30s, talking about people in their 50s as if they have no idea about what is going on. And, have children that they have engaged with, and observed the many issues too.
For sure. But if the path is to blame others for the path taken, isn't that something that should be highlighted?
I can clearly see my mother saying to me, more that half a century ago
hahhaa - mine didn't say it to me - but I heard her say it to my brothers :)
I've definitely started to realize that some of the stuff on my bucket list is just going to be unattainable. It's not for lack of trying either, but things like traveling to different places in the world just isn't as safe as it used to be. In addition to that, barring some kind of massive windfall, I don't think owning a house on a lake is likely going to happen for me. Again, not for lack of trying. The real world just has other plans it seems. Who knows...
But I wonder - what else you have done in the same time. What if you had done less in other areas and focused on only one or two things - would it make a difference? I think we are often spread too thin these days - which is the curse of too many options in font of us.
Yeah, that could be part of it. It is hard to say. I know there are definitely areas that we could change things that might help towards those other goals. I just imagined somehow all of it would be a bit easier I think. I'm fine that it's not, but it's crazy how much the world has changed from when dreams were conceived to where we are now.
I think we all have. I think it was easier in the past, because we had less to focus on and the goals and paths were pretty clear. Now, people seem to value a lot of things that have no real value, other than personal feelings. That is fine too - but it comes at a cost.
As a parent of three teenagers, I often console myself that yes, now I am the dumbass. So I dole out advice with the knowledge that it may or may not be followed, and that my teenagers will venture forth and make many of the same mistakes I did, that I could have avoided, and that they could avoid, if we'd just listened to our parents... but maybe the lessons wouldn't really have stuck if we had? Watching our cyclical nature play out is kind of fun once you surrender to it.
I don't know - my parents never really had any good advice for me! :D
Hahahahahaaa
I understand your reflection and, while it is true that we live in an era of greater distractions and choices, I also believe that technology and science have changed the rules of the game. It is not just a matter of "living within the media", as you mention, but of adapting to different economic and social realities. Today, for example, access to information makes it possible to explore alternatives that did not exist before: digital entrepreneurship, collaborative economies, and so on. However, I agree that without discipline and focus, any advice, however valuable, will be useless. As you say, "simplifying" and prioritising is still key, but adapting these principles to our times can make a difference, don't you think?
I answered this before, but it wouldn't go through because the comment got deleted before I could submit...
It doesn't matter what tools we have avvailable - if we don't learn how to use them, they are useless.
Saw you were an SPS validator.. you got my 602k SPS vote.
oh no!! I appreciate it a lot mate - but I don't have a full node. I can recommend a few though!
@vugtis / @azircon / @seattlea
Ah okay. I got two of those guys on my votes.
As Agatha Christie's Miss Marple said, "Just because people ignore good advice, it doesn't mean you shouldn't give it."
Even when it isn't welcomed :)
I am not getting much money but I still I invest some in Hive, splinterlands or now Bitcoin. Next few months I will probably not have the funds to invest(because I will be saving money to buy wood briquettes) But I hope that after that I will return to the right path.😛
May the force be with you...
When I was child as well as teen, I didn't care the advices of older people much; however, after growing into adult, I recognized that they are important. Even, I have started to give advices to youngs :)
I am quite sure that when these people "grow up", the ones who were able to be successful will largely be telling the same things they heard from older people.
Buckets are starting to get filled. I think I need to find more buckets. Life is good!